Damn 'ol thing it tis. Itches like nuthin I e'er felt. Stupid bugs, your the Poosker ye fool. Help me get rid o' these damnable things.

I hate to tell you this but you have what we liked to call, 'Puces Barbe Morts', or undead beard fleas. And the only way to be rid of them is to cut off your beard and then burn the hair.

No! Just kill me it's less painful that way.

Looking for Dwarven proverbs, sayings, euphemisms, quotes, and anecdotes? We are too! Please help the fledgling Dwarven Guild in its infancy stages! Looking to make a list of 101+ with the help of our beardless brethren!

Beard grooming is a life-long process divided between two schools of thought: harsh mineral treatments or more the natural approach. The popular naturalist approach requires beard-spiders that live off lice, fleas and other small insects.

A grab-bag of draconic goodness, ready to plug into a variety of settings from Steam-Punk to Modern to Fantasy.

Hi Ho, Hi Ho....not included

Tis but a scratch, send the guards and make sure they capture that joke of an assassin

He stood before me, a freankenstien of a man beast that towered twenty feet tall or more. Its rigor colored flesh stunk of eons of decay both sickly sweet and of putrescence beyond what the mortal mind could fathom. I tried to gag it from my throat but my stomach refused to relieve its contents and for that made me more uneasy.

Former Cult Leader who outlived his usefulness

The true depths of darkness travel far deeper into the hearts of mortal man than the darkest and deepest cave I have ventured in. What once could have started as an innocent trek into the unknown for the sake of curiosity I have seen lead to the blackening of the soul and the withering of all those around it. All in the name of innocence and knowledge.

The following are my findings on the subject, as horrible as they are. I just hope I can finish this before my mind is lost to me. I feel the ebb and flow pulling inside me, no that is to simple an explanation. I feel my soul losing its hold on me. The more knowledge I gain, the more I know I am lost.

Kormak Cabeaza, Scribe and Scholar to Lord King Vyrkril the Just of Camerial

All dwarves in the Ven mountains are familiar with this simple game. Though elaborate and colorful game board have been craft, the game is simple enough that you could out line a board in the dirt and play with four handfuls of stones.

CRTF's first resident goofball animal mascot.

A joint French-Canadian company, Chalopin-Barkin of Mars is one of the pre-eminent manufacturers of space mining equipment and exotic vehicles.

Madmen, Riddles, and Worms

A recently re-discovered odd treatise

30 wierd, wonderful and wacky wedding customs for your worlds.

The door to the building is open, but inside is nothing but darkness. The lights are out: What do you do?

A Mastersmiths' guide to metals of worth and the knowledge you will need to become a true Master of Metals.

by Master Blademsith Cethrik Hammerstone

Master of the Thirteeth Blade, Bladesmith to King Regrare Alderkin, Maker of Caldebane - The Ever Cutting Blade

Local farmers and foresters have the greatest bow making wood in all the land, they also have the skill to protect it.

A fine cloak that allows the wearer to see from a statue's eyes.

'Aye, I've been to Bloodmaw. Its out in the ocean, and lies right on the Abez-Evetepor trade route. Or at least where the trade route would have been if it wasn't for Bloodmaw. Its this maelstrom, perpetually spinning and swirling, abou' 50 yards across? And the sea around the whole thing is a deep crimson. The color of blood. And around the whole thing is a storm. Some days the Bloodmaw is sated, and isn't as violent. But some days ye can't hope to survive. On bad days it can take a ship that a mile away. Thank the gods that it didn't take me.'

-Old Gerald, man in the pub

A sadistic murderer.