1Â Where you going lad? it is your turn to work the bellows.
2Â I said Mountain Hall not Mount Them All
3Â Her husband looked up and said 'This tastes like soap'
4Â Then the Gnome says 'I can't smell any gems in there but I will keep my nose in it'
5Â All my spikes are flush
6Â Yes that is a beard in my pants
7Â Pull me a pint from Groemdigger's stout
8Â Take it easy, don't forge it.
9Â He ended up with a piece of blue-fairie pie
10Â The mining guild member took out two wooden planks and said 'all tunnels need at least two pieces of shoring before a Guild member can work'
12Â Two days later he pulled out a diamond
13Â I don't understand, I have been hammering the dagger for hours and the steel still isn't pink
14Â A beard in the hand is worth two in the bush
15Â She is not what she a beard to be
16Â A toothpick
17Â Cause the next day you piss splinters
18Â That is not a arquebus but it is loaded
19Â The human would ride in the boat and tip the bar maid
20Â Then the male goblin says let just stay here till we out number them
21Â After 59 minutes the dwarf got up to leave saying, 'You said a 100 gold an hour, if I stayed another minute I would have to pay'
22Â You said treat it like a masterwork sword, so I offered it to the king
23Â The guild woman who usually does that part called in sick, but the Harriah will make you breakfast and Bella will take your money
24Â Everyone knows Dwarves only eat once a day
25Â You were supposed to look for shaved coins
26Â She is just whistling while she works
27Â That Gnome just spit on me!
28Â Then the gold miner's daughter said 'I was just following the vein'
29Â The entire mining guild is working the shaft, my lord
30Â I thought you wanted red meat off the bone
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? Responses (7)-7
Definitely dwarven, but not what I was expecting.
This would be an easy 5 for me, if the jokes to the punchlines were included. Regardless, #'s 2,15,28, 29 made me laugh.
Why can't you tell jokes online timing
forgot to vote
Some I just didn't get. Others were plainly obviously. At first I didn't like it, then I accepted it, then I enjoyed it.
Amusing in its own right. I agree with Muro that including the jokes would improve the submission, but as it is I can still bring the PCs in at the tail end of a dwarven conversation (if you'll forgive the pun).
I actually liked that you had to fill in the jokes yourself. It made me laugh :)