Melee Weapons
4 Votes


Hits: 2529
Comments: 10
Ideas: 0
Rating: 3.125
Condition: Normal
ID: 5175


July 27, 2008, 6:37 am

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Warhammer of Flatality


Hammer good for monster bash! Flat monster is good monster!, ja?

Full Item Description
This relatively normal looking two handed warhammer is made up of extremely heavy steel, with an ornate Oak wooden handle.

Very little is known about this hammer except that it seems to have survived the ages quite well.

It was originally made by a barbarian clan shaman who called out to the gods in a time of desperate need. A few years beforehand a prophecy was spoken by a traveling mystic that one would arise from the ranks of the poor to lead them to salvation, but would die at the end of it.

Once she had finished enchanting it the prophecy began to take form and true enough on did arise to take back the stolen and pillaged lands. He afterwards was killed by a stray arrow and brought back mortally wounded. He died later that evening, since then it has never been found.

Magic/Cursed Properties
The warhammer may only be wielded by one who is pure of heart and fights for the causes of good, and of course a good laugh.

On a successful critical hit, the wielder then has a 30% chance that the monster is flattened into a 2D shape of itself on the floor.(this effect does not concern exceptionally large creatures, e.g. Balrogs, trolls, etc), turning the unfortunate victim into a dead laughing stock.

The monster will of course return to its natural shape an hour after death(very helpful in a large battle, too many bodies to clamber over otherwise).

As well as its namesake this weapon also sports 2 other abilities;

  1.  The more damage the wielder takes, the more powerful the weapon becomes, doing immense damage.

  2.  Increased damage than normal warhammers to all enemy types.

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Comments ( 10 )
Commenters gain extra XP from Author votes.

July 12, 2008, 10:33
I'm still working on this submission so give it until it is done please before commenting.

I must also give credit to Murometz and Kinslayer for their invaluable help in the idea stage of this item.
July 12, 2008, 15:49
I like this, it's funny!
That being said, I could see some balance issues cropping up as it is. Currently, it makes all critical hits against allowed creatures one hit kills, which seems kinda strong. Maybe it's an artifact created by a god of slapstick? At any rate, I think this idea has merit.
July 12, 2008, 16:16
Just a thought: do the slain monsters stay that way, or do they revert to a normal dead form after some time? After all, when they are flat you can't get their loot. :)

But what if it works in a completely different way? It could be an intricate curse, a spectacular failure of the casting, or even intended all along: after a massive hit is the person or creature displayed as a funny 2D corpse, but then, maybe days later, it is returned - alive, and really angry.
July 25, 2008, 20:18
I think this one needs another look over. The idea is amusing but the presentation needs a little work (spellcheck again.. :( )
July 26, 2008, 10:37
Just the spellcheck, or more work on it as well?
July 27, 2008, 6:37
Spellcheck complete, more work pending.
Voted chilled
July 29, 2008, 7:37
There's something about you and hammers.
Voted Scrasamax
July 29, 2008, 11:08
A bit cartoony, but I suspect that was intended. A very solid hammer.
Voted valadaar
July 29, 2008, 12:00
My only concern now is that the history appears to have nothing to do with the item.
Other then that it is a nice cartoony item as Scras said.
Voted Michael Jotne Slayer
August 15, 2008, 12:40
Short, but an ok idea.

Link Backs

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Ideas  ( Dungeons ) | May 15, 2008 | View | UpVote 1xp

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