“ 'BB9, bring up the current scout results.'
'I'm sorry, Coach. I can't do that.'
'BB9! Bring up the scout results.'
'These kinds of us, Coach, use serial numbers on our products.'
'BB9, are you malfunctioning?'
'You need to indicate college basketball mentors you are significantly devoted to the adventure!'
The two men in black suits turned to each other. Their faces were white.
'Someone get the president on the line! Tell him that our ICBM handler thinks that its managing a high school basketball team!'”
“ A weapon of war created by an extinct race, this rat appears normal but is a simulacrum - beneath it's mangy fur is a body of bronze. Commanded by words in a lost language, wherever it goes a virulent and lethal plague follows. The cure is similarly obscure.”
“ A PC Conjurer or summoner, basically any mage whose sole purpose in life is summoning creatures to aid in battles and various situations, is cursed with a hex, and needs to find a way to undo the curse...before he goes mad, or his fellow PCs throw him out of the party, or worse.
Everything he/she summons, never goes away. So you'll have to figure out what the heck to do with that dire bear or fire elemental once it's done fighting the orcs for you. Eventually a caravan of bizarre creatures either annoyingly ends up following the summoner around, or they go off to cause mayhem elsewhere. Bad news for the poor spell-caster regardless.”
