"Tired of lugging about heavy quivers full of arrows? Or are you constantly buying the wrong arrows to suite your tactical needs? Well, your hassles will be but a memory with the Fundarin Mages Conglomerate's Vendo-Quiver!
Yes, finally you will have at your fingertips the entire line of FMC's quality projectiles! And with its patented Pay-as-you-go enchantments, you can get what you need with just-in-time delivery! Simply drop the appropriate payment into the quiver and the selected arrow will magically appear, ready to be cast into your foes!
No credit accepted. All items provided as is. No refunds. No guarantees. You are not intitled to any additional rights based on your jurisdiction. All arrow designs and intellectual property are the sole possession of FMC. Void where prohibited. Prohibited where void. Verboten in the Void. Not for use by anyone under 48" in height. Please use with FMC only brand long and shortbows. Please enjoy responsibly."
Full Item Description
A somewhat garishly decorated, but well crafted quiver of doeskin leather. It is brightly painted with the colors of FMC's corporate insignia.
The Vendo-Quiver is essentially a normal quiver fitted with a special, bi-directional magical portal. Items of value dropped into it are transported elsewhere (the FMC's well hidden and secured arms facility) and selected arrows are transported into the quiver. The user may speak the type of arrow desired as payment is made.
Arrows purchased in this manner typically cost 10x what the normal price, though this can of course be set by the GM, but in no case should they be normal priced or less. Inferior payment might be offered, in which case, the buyer will receive 'B' grade arrows which will have major problems - missing fletchings, arrowheads, warped shafts, etc.
Actual costs can be made known the Quiver's owner through various means, including trial and error, finding a price list in the quiver or stamped on the side, a pamphlet found with the quiver, etc. Of course, this information could be out of date.
Each payment must be either a single coin or gem, or contained in a small pouch - a loose handful of silver would get a bunch of poor arrows rather then a single good one, for example.
The payment collection and dispensing is carried out at the remote site by a complicated, somewhat unpredictable machine, and so the actual arrow received may vary greatly from that requested, but generally never better then what was asked/paid for.
It is possible one could adapt this to be non-silly, but the idea of a vending quiver strikes me as irretrievably silly.
It does allow the bearer to access such things as Cold Iron and Silver arrows, though at inflated costs. It is also a good vehicle for introducing various odd Arrow Types (such as from Murometz's Fletcher's Delight submission.
The highly inflated price it charges can also serve to drain down PC's gold supplies if they get addicted to magic arrows.
The PC's might get it into their heads to find where the money is going and well, help themselves. The FMC's secret installation of course would be defended by all manner of strange and wonderful magical defences...
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? Responses (7)
It is silly, but it's fun and quite entrepreneureal. I like it.
Allow me to softly chuckle on this item. It is silly, but certainly applicable to some settings. Kudos for the highly inflated price (that can change), and its campaign impact.
Good work - and funny too!
Please enjoy responsibly
Hahahaha, funny, val! And great for the right campaign, as manfred implies.
Void where prohibited. Prohibited where void. Verboten in the Void
Had to use Verboten. Love that word.
LOL Silly but funny and useful as well.
I love this item... Just plain silly and could be so much fun...