There are few, if any, chapels dedicated to Yandrick the Wag, the rustic saint of herdsmen (especially swineherds). Despite this, he is honored by many among the peasantry. Their comic tales of how he humiliated oppressive nobles and hypocritical churchmen are told around the hearth fires every winter.
For many years, the Church was reluctant to recognize the sanctity of this irreverent holy man, but after tales of his miracles were presented by the peasants of dozens of villages, the hierarchy was forced to acknowledge the evidence and canonize the “Saint of the Pig Bells”. In the decades that followed his canonization, many a pompous churchman or pedantic theologian has been heard grumbling cynically about the puckish saint’s taste in miracles.
The Life of Waggish Yandrick
Yandrick was an orphan, one of many children who lost their families in the plagues that marked the final years of the Bandit Wars. The disease that had taken his parents left him crippled, with withered legs that could barely support his weight. Taken in by the local sexton, young Yandrick was set to work keeping the villagers’ pigs, tottering into the forest daily so that the swine could feed on the acorns and brush of the woodland.
Abused and mocked by the other children of the village, the small orphan spent much of his time with the animals. He could often be seen in the forest, studying the plants and befriending the wild creatures, with the village’s hogs surrounding him as if they were guarding him. The children that teased and beat poor Yandrick so cruelly often discovered strange mishaps befell them: Mice ate holes in their shoes, squirrels nested in the thatch above their beds, or pigs shouldered them into muddy streams. Yandrick never seemed to be around when these mishaps occurred, but the village children blamed him and persecuted him all the worse.
This abuse ended the year that the Burning Ague hit the village. Even though the villagers had treated him cruelly, Yandrick helped them with the strange gifts he had been granted. Wild pigs brought him healing herbs and roots to soothe those suffering from the Ague. It was later said that he was responsible for calling a miraculous horde of swine that saved the village from rampaging brigands. When famine threatened, Yandrick led people into the forest to dig for underground mushrooms hidden from others’ sight. Yandrick forgave the villagers their slights, and they came to love the solitary swineherd. Although he still preferred the solitude of the forest, it became common to see him at the temple, earnestly reading the holy texts and commentaries.
The adolescent Yandrick became well known for helping those in need, but the otherwise pious youth also grew infamous for the low-brow jests he played upon the pompous and self-important. Tricking a greedy knight into seeking treasures in the bottom of a marl-pit, persuading a lecherous friar and his foolish paramour to exchange their clothing with a pair of pompous nuns, and convincing a pedantic scholar that great wisdom could be gained if one questioned fish in the town square were among the least offensive of his japes.
Eventually, Yandrick took holy vows and retreated into the solitude of the forests as a wandering anchorite. He traveled the land, sharing his faith and encouraging others to fight against injustice, not by taking up arms, but by duping the cruel and humiliating the proud.
As an old man, Yandrick continued his humorous assaults against the cruel and mighty, until he was eventually slain by an enraged knight, Sir Reywold, the Lord de Fonella. According to the legend, the pompous man was infuriated by the prankish saint’s convincing him to don “The Cloak of the Phoenix”, which had encrusted him with a layer of hot tar and feathers. The slain saint’s body was carried into the forest by a herd of massive pigs and was never seen again.
The Fall of the Sable Company
A Miracle of Saint Yandrick
Yandrick is not only known as the patron saint of herdsmen. He is also believed to lend his benevolence to vagabonds and turncoats, and is often invoked by those who fear punishment for disloyal deeds. If asked, those seeking his intervention often cite the well-known tale of the Sable Company.
In the Winter of the Harvest Star, after the Bandit Wars had been concluded, plague and misery stalked the land. “Free Companies” of unemployed mercenaries haunted the wild lands as bandits and extorted from the already-meager lives of the villagers. Few of these companies were as infamous as the “Sable Company” of Ludhovic Malatesta. These relentless brigands ravaged village after village, leaving a trail of destruction in their wake.
Eventually, their rampage carried them to Saubridge, the tiny hamlet where Saint Yandrick lived. Most of the villagers fled their approach, but the young saint chose not to flee as the others had. Instead, he hobbled to meet the approaching column of masterless soldiers as they crossed the covered wooden bridge at the village’s edge. The cruel men laughed when the crippled boy offered them all the pork they wanted, if only they turned back. They told him that they would take all his pork, and everything else his village had as well. Their laughter turned to cries of shock as dozens of massive swine appeared in response to the jingling bells of the swineherd’s staff. Huge beasts, nearly eight feet at the shoulder, the unnatural boars surged forward toward the brigands.
Panic seized the men at the uncanny sight. Those who had left the bridge already found their way blocked by their fellows, while scores more were within the wooden structure, unable to see what was happening. When dozens of the huge pigs slammed into the bridge, the raiders were trapped within as it collapsed into the icy river below.
A handful of brigands remained. Faced with the swineherd’s guardian pigs, they repented of their banditry, forswore their allegiance to the Sable Company and repudiated their loyalty to Ludhovic Malatesta. When he demanded they return (He had survived the debacle at the bridge, being a firm believer in leading from the rear), the penitent men instead reported to a local monastery, becoming the original members of what later became know as the “Repentant Brethren”, one of the land’s more formidable bands of monastic warriors.
The Heretical Sects
Occasional heresies have sprung up around Yandrick as well. The most unusual of these involved a band of rebellious peasants known as the “Pyg Snatchers”. These uneducated folk decided that swine were holy and should be kept in the land’s temples. They were notorious for stealing the swine of those who they deemed unworthy, generally looting any other wealth they could find at the same time. Edsel the Awkward, warped leader of the unruly band, killed himself rather than face the vengeful knights of several local lords. His “holy pigs” were confiscated and returned to their owners.
Relics of Saint Yandrick
Numerous relics of Saint Yandrick have appeared in the decades since the holy man’s mysterious death. The most popular of these are the “Holy Skulls of Yandrick”, of which there are at least a dozen. The owners of these bony remnants each claim theirs to be the true and original skull of Yandrick, and each is reputed to have holy powers, ranging from healing the afflicted to summoning wild boars. Official church doctrine claims that these skulls exist by “miraculous multiplication”, but rumors tell that several of the skulls were originally given to poor villagers by an extremely old man with withered legs and a swineherd’s staff. Sold to wealthy churchmen and nobles, the money raised going to aid the impoverished villages.
Some cynical theologians and historians, unable to find any noble house named “de Fonella”, suspect that the skulls may all indeed have belonged to the blessed Saint Yandrick.
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Codex
Dire Swine
By: Scrasamax
( Lifeforms ) Fauna -
Forest/ Jungle The earth holds the fool and holds the wise,
endures that good and bad dwell (upon her);
she keeps company with the boar,
gives herself up to the wild hog.
The Atharva Veda
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Full Description
Stand half as tall as a man at the shoulder and as heavy as a small horse, dire swine are animals not to be triffled with. They are covered with coarse, wiry hair that generally thins as the swine age. Most come in shades of brown, though black, gray, red, and white are not uncommon. The head is large and the jaw well equiped for consuming plant matter, roots, nuts, and the ocassional animal that crosses their path wrong. Male swine grow tusks as long as a man’s hand and both genders have thick and very durable skulls.
The Beast of the Fold
Dire Swine are most commonly found in tropical and semi-tropical forests where they are foragers, eating insects, fruits, nuts, and the roots of various plants. In some cases, the swine will hunt and kill living prey to add protein to their diet though this is rare outside of lean food times. Druids, rangers, and Elves are able to communicate in a limited fashion with dire swine, though the porcine behemoths can be ill-tempered and as dangerous as wolves when provoked.
Domestication
Attempts have been made to domesticate the large and robust dire swine to human use, but all have failed. By nature, the swine are solitary or travel in small family groups. In rare circumstances, herd, or sounders will form, but this is dangerous as when this occurs the swine are much more predisposed to hunting rather than foraging. Magical means can be used to ‘control’ a dire pig, but such efforts are seldom worth the cost of the magics used.
As mentioned above, a druid, ranger, or elf of the forest can take a solitary dire pig as a companion much as a wizard takes a familiar but there is no innate magical bond formed, merely a sympathetic understanding of nature.
Plot Hooks
Amok, Amok, Amok - A village has become the target of a larger and aggressive sounder of dire swine. The fields have been devastated and some livestock has been killed. The peasants cower in their huts never knowing if the swine will upon them dine. The PCs must deal with 20 to 30 dire swine, be it combating them, luring them away, or some other method. A great idea for a low level party.
The Green Druid
As above, the village is being assaulted by dire swine, but the cause is a radical druid who wants the village gone as it is, in his opinion, too close to a sacred grove. The PCs must face not only the giant swine, but also a armed and dangerous druid who has been in the green a bit too long.
Breakfast of Champions
One night, as the PCs fail to set up a watch, a few dire swine meander into their camp. The PCs awaken to find the swine rooting through their packs, muching on the grain and other special feed for their horses and anything else the pigs might think tasty. If the PCs dont over-react, the swine will move on and cause no more problems. If they shout, the largest of the swine, the male, will become angry and start attacking the noise-makers.
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Order of the Holy Swine
By: manfred
( Systems ) Mystical -
General Deep forests hide many secrets, and traditions older and stranger than civilization itself.
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"... when the first people entered the woods, they were powerless at first. The animals were cautious and swift, some fruits that seemed edible were revealed as poisonous, and little food was found anywhere. Harsh times it were, and they might have perished, if the Boar Spirit had no mercy with them. And she has shown them where to find the good fruit, and which to avoid, what roots to eat, and what herbs to seek if one is ill. Thus have the people learned how to survive in the woods, and closed friendship with the boars."
- that claims the myth the Order spreads as the only truth, and most other people consider bogus. Deep in the woods they live, only rarely they visit the civilization, to liberate the unlucky pigs humans have enslaved over the years (or so they say). Naturally, many consider them insane. It is no surprise they are forbidden this meat.
"The Order" is more a loose tradition than any organization, its members living loosely in deep woods, considered primitive by the civilized world.
The Boar Spirit prefers to have little contact with others, tending to its own affairs and offspring. It may attack if approached at the wrong time or in the wrong way, so beware. It teaches self-sufficiency, and a peaceful nature, that responds strongly on any threat. A follower of her will not start a conflict, but may well bring it to the bitter end.
Swine Magic is a wizardly School of Magic, specializing on mimicking the abilities of the Boar Spirit (who supposedly taught these long ago). These magic-users are wizards, and can teach their spells to other wizards, should they be considered worthy.
Rarely, it happens that the Boar Spirit touches an adept of this school for his devotion, and confers him a deeper insight into this magic, making him or her a true shaman. This does not seem to happen with more than one person at any given time, though.
History:
"The Order" are the remains of the Tribe of the Boar. As civilization approached the forest, the tribe found it’s way of life under a subtle siege. For long have the followers of Boar been proud of their mastery of the woodlands, where they could eke out decent living, at least compared to other tribes. But then came agriculture and towns, many permanent settlements started appearing around, and suddenly it was not so great to live in the forest.
As tribes have been vanishing, the small roaming family groups have come into many contacts (and occasional conflicts) with other folk. Too frequently, young people have abandoned the old ways and left to see the new world. The elders have made the decision to retreat deeper into the woods.
But the damage has been already done. Limited trade exists even today, with tools of metal and other comforts exchanged for what can be found there. Still they are distrustful of strangers, and isolate themselves as far as it goes. Even literacy has reached them, through wandering sages and wise men (an easy plug for a druidic tradition if you want), allowing them to write down their magics and wisdom, something unheard before.
"The Order" represents a counterculture to the civilization around, determined to not leave their woods for any price. Rarely, young idealists of the towns and cities will develop a philosophy of a ‘return to the nature’ or ‘the noble savage’ (yes, they are savages to the outside), and join them in their uneasy, but ‘natural’ life. One day, there will come a direct clash of these two ways of life; most likely violent. For now are the woods deep enough, the arts learned from Boar used on hiding, and deterring intruders.
The Boar spirit has sensed the changes in its sponsored people. It does not understand what is happening from its time scale, but time will show. For now, it chooses the rare men and women which are close to the former ideals of tribal existence, and would make good shamans back then. Respect for the Boar is of course mandatory.
Typical spells and abilities:
Enhance senses - namely taste and smell. The target is partially able to track with his nose; as many of the Order know common, visual tracking, they can be very adept at it. Edible roots can be also found if you are not too noble to get down to earth. It takes some experience to fully use and appreciate.
Blend - moving little or standing still, the target is hard to discern against natural background (foliage, wood, etc). Wrong clothing may give him off easily, so dress properly. It is speculated that old followers of the tradition have this effect permanently on them.
Iron stomach - with this spell, almost any organic matter can be eaten, and digested to a degree. Note that while ingested poison may be resisted with this spell, there is no guarantee. The spell is seldom used, because it does not change the taste, and most often produces severe cramps afterward. It is useful to prevent starvation and is rarely used for bets ("I bet you won’t eat this…").
Enhance hair-growth - occasionally used on the liberated pigs, to make them better blend in nature, some use it to grow beards or long hair. Fashion in any way.
Charge* - roaring mightily, the caster runs towards the enemy. The spell can help to intimidate some opponents, and to have a good start on others, but is only usable at the start of the fight. Do not forget even powerful wild boars withdraw sometimes. Not all enemies can be defeated.
Boar Bellow* a non-combat variant of Charge, an inhuman LOUD scream is produced by the caster. (Louder than a jet engine taking off - thanks to Murometz for this one!)
Flee* - the target can evade physical combat or direct capture. Shouting madly and moving erratically will confuse the enemies, and may give enough time for escape. It is very entertaining to cast it on a domesticated swine during an attempted slaughter.
Guardian - cast on a group; the caster or a selected person will know, if a member of that group leaves a certain distance from him/her, or is in immediate danger (while still close). The Boar Spirit is remembered as a good mother, that never leaves its children behind.
Huddle - for deep winter, the people/creatures that huddle together with the caster while in some cover from outside, stay comfortably warm, and can rest even in not ideal conditions.
Burst - the target becomes able to run a large distance at a solid pace without much exhaustion, for a time. Beware though, as taking on the power of the Boar means taking the weakness as well: especially in summer it is easy to overheat one’s organism, so remember to cool down.
Resist Parasites - the swine do not have fleas, as their skin is so thick. The target is similarly protected from the various little buggers that want to get his blood. (thanks to Murometz for this one!)
So ugly it is cute - some say the Boar blesses with this effect all small piglets. It allows even a bit unnatural, or some might say, ugly, appearances to appear cute and harmless. The effect can be dissipate with too extreme looks or improper actions, it also won’t hinder anyone really wishing to do harm; but it’s a potent protection if used right. Remember, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
This school of magic was made for the K10 game rules, "just because", to show that anything can be made with them. Have fun if you use it!
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May 15, 2007, 14:07
May 15, 2007, 14:32
Nicely done with your trademark humor!
May 15, 2007, 15:50
...yes, there is a bit of strange melancholy, besides the humour, in those swine posts. :)
May 15, 2007, 16:43
May 16, 2007, 7:24
May 16, 2007, 19:43
did I mention that I love a good, realistic saint? Yandrick is original, and begs to be added to a campaign. As others have mentioned, nice mix of humor and, hmmm, dare I say...a bit of angst. And of course, the obligatory 'weird' relics!
Kudos on this one Wulf!