Third Kingdom
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Rating: 4.25
Condition: Normal
ID: 3438


December 14, 2006, 2:46 pm

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Buzurivambavas, the Scuttling Apothecaries


Buzurivambavas is Bastard Demonspeak, and comes from the true Demonspeak bzhuu’vhambv’s, which means “carrying and crawling one”, or “one that carries and crawls”. They are a subtle kind of demon, and do not exhibit the terrible rage and bloodthirst of some other demons.

The Scuttling Apothecaries are human-like, generally, and around 5 feet tall, and have a hunched, heavy appearance. They have large, round potbellies which hang over their pudgy thighs. They have long, knobbly arms with large, six-fingered hands, and they are extremely bow-legged. Their feet are wide, flat, and have no separate toes. But on their backs, they carry shells like those of ladybugs, which can split open to reveal huge, translucent, and useless wings suitable only for show. These shells, rather than having a black and red pattern, possess the image of a grinning porcelain mask with painted face. Buzurivambavas have stumpy, insectoid heads which are fused into their shoulders and shells, with big compound eyes and snapping jaws. Their human bodies are very hairy. They rarely wear anything more than a kilt of woven reeds, and carry their ingredient and raegent bottles on their belts or hanging from their shells and arms.
Buzurivambavas possess no real fighting capabilities; they are slow, scuttling and trundling of movement, and are easily overturned and slain. They coat the palms of their hands, however, in alchemical greases and pastes, dying them bright colors, and when they touch mortals with these greases, they cause terrible, agonizing alchemical burns.

The Scuttling Apothecaries are solitary wanderers of Hell, nomads who travel Hell’s insane wastes and wilds in search of the millions and millions of ingredients detailed in the holy book of the Buzurivambavas, the Orange Book of the Disgusting Gods. The purpose of the Buzurivambavas existence is to gather the ingredients and to create the medicines and alchemical brews which they peddle to their demonic customers. Any alchemical substance which can be made, any medicine which can be fabricated, any miraculous brew which can be produced, has been made and sold by the Buzurivambavas.

All Buzurivambavas are technically vassals of the Infinitely Horrible Vizier of Hell, who tries, but not too hard, to reign them to it’s will. However, the Scuttling Apothecaries hate the Vizier, who frequently regards them as delicacies and eats them alive or spitted on their own bones, and they flee from any attempt of his to control them.

Buzurivambas are delighted by new ingredients and raegents which they have not seen before, and love hearing talented poets scream out verses from the Orange Book of the Disgusting Gods under pain of hideous tortures. Sorcerors summon them to procure their incredible talents in alchemy.

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Comments ( 9 )
Commenters gain extra XP from Author votes.

Voted Scrasamax
December 14, 2006, 13:13
Beware the attack of the forward slashes!

I really like these splendidly comical and vile creatures and their less than sympathetic master. Spitting them on their own bones, nice touch.
Voted Wulfhere
December 14, 2006, 13:16
I've always found odd alchemists amusing, and these fellows are certainly odd.
Voted Cheka Man
December 14, 2006, 13:30
No wonder they flee from the Vizier.
Voted manfred
December 14, 2006, 14:48
And the slashes have been made to go away. CP knows how to make an interesting demon.
December 14, 2006, 15:09
Another interesting demon coming out from the woodwork! :)
Voted Murometz
December 14, 2006, 22:35
just got home, long day, and I decided to read just one new sub tonight (from the plethora of new ones). I picked soley based on the names and titles of the subs. I figured whichever one grabs my attention, thats the one I'll read. You can guess the rest :D

Nice Cap!
Voted valadaar
August 10, 2007, 11:56
Upgrading vote - really like these critters...
Voted MoonHunter
August 10, 2007, 14:06
Intersting look, nice additon to the hellish socio-ecology. Good color piece.
Voted Moonlake
July 3, 2013, 22:35
Like these low-level demons (in terms of fighting ability) that are preyed upon by the Vizier and have their own unique uses as alchemists.

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       By: Murometz

The food that eats you back.

Creatures of nightmare, the thankfully rare Mesnoi have unique form and attributes. Only one Mesnoi at a time will ever be "encountered".

In appearance, a Mesnoi resembles a walnut-sized chunk of freshly-roasted red meat from some uncertain yet familiar, edible animal. The insidious creature camouflages itself quite appropriately whenever it can, by slowly making its way amidst feast tables and trays of roasted meats.

Once eaten by the unsuspecting, the Mesnoi sinks down to the stomach, reforming if chewed, and begins to lap up the gastric fluids, digestive juices, and bile that it craves, like a sponge.

The Mesnoi carrier will experience mild to severe stomach pains during this time.

After a few hours of this (this is the only time that the Mesnoi can be purged with magic, or other mundane means), the Mesnoi transforms into its true form inside its victim, that of a miniature, once more walnut-sized, pot-bellied, devil-horned, snake-tailed imp. This horrid little creature then begins to chew and eat its way out of the victim from the inside out with its tiny, razor-sharp teeth, like a rat forced to do so via torture.

The victim almost always dies a slow, agonizing death. That much is certain. The devilish imp then exits its victim and begins its seventy two hour existence of mischief and malevolence, until it once more turns back into a hunk of roasted meat with the movement capabilities of a snail.

Ideas  ( Lifeforms ) | December 4, 2015 | View | UpVote 6xp

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