Divine/ Spirit
6 Votes


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Comments: 10
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Rating: 4.0833
Condition: Normal
ID: 2282


March 21, 2006, 11:25 pm

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Cheka Man

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Yr, the Flaming Sun


Worshipped by the barbaric warlike people of the southern deserts this sun god takes on the cruelety of the desert sun.

Worshipped by the Kazi, a warlike, nomadic people that wander the desert for their entire life, he is a vengeful god.  He cares little for the suffering of his worshippers, he demands that they be strong and upright.  His priests say that only the strong get to heaven, and that the only way to strength is through adversity.  Because of this belief his worshippers very rarely live past their mid 30’s, often dying in the middle of some heroic exploit.

The sun is Yr and Yr is the sun.  He was there in the beginning, and through him everything began.  In the beginning he begot his children, the angles, and they begot the various species of the world.  It was then that he laid down his commands, foremost among them to love only him.  But some of his children were ill-content to serve him, and with their children, went about to kill him in his sleep.  But his only daughter, Moon, realized the evil they were about to commit and at the last moment betrayed the conspirators and woke her father.  In his anger he cast out the unfaithful and changed their children so that they no longer resembled him.  His faithful he called the Kazi and laid out new commands to them.

His commands are this:
Be strong and show no fear in adversity;
Kill no one in treachery, in this lies only the ways of the Fallen;
Show the heathens no quarter, they will show you the same;
Hold no other gods beside me;
Do not lie to your brother, nor steal from him;
Honor your father’s father and your mother’s mother, in them is the truth;

His teachers say that he has no sympathy for the decadent.  And the eventually, when the heathens have sunk so far into decadence and decay there is no hope of them ever recovering, he will cleanse the world and give it all to his chosen ones.  When this happens the dead will rise in a final, apocalyptic battle, and those who survive to the end will have been deemed worthy and will live in eternal bliss for the rest of time.  Those who die, and are viewed as unfit for Ys’s presence, will be cast into the abyss, to spend eternity in torment, replaying the worst moments of their lives over and over.

But until that time there is the land of the dead, lorded over by Moon.  This is where one goes to await the Apocalypse.  Here the people are exposed to Yr’s wonderful presence, and deprived of it, given only the abyss.  It is a torment, but it serves only as a grindstone to remove your imperfections until the end comes.

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Comments ( 10 )
Commenters gain extra XP from Author votes.

Voted Cheka Man
January 31, 2006, 22:21
Very Old Testamentish. I like the abyss idea of Hell.
Voted Scrasamax
January 31, 2006, 22:51
Not bad, a very Pagan sun-god whose demands echo with the sound of the God of the Old Testament.
Voted Dragon Lord
February 1, 2006, 10:26
Small inconsistency with the race write-up:

In the write-up for the Kazi race - "The Kazi have no wives, instead sharing the women of the tribe among themselves and their guests. Because of this family lineage is not tracked through the father but through the mother"

Here, in the write-up for their god - "Honour your father's father and your mother's mother, in them is the truth"

How could they honour their father's father when they do not keep track of paternal parentage, and indeed cannot do so since, giving their mating practices, no individual can know who his father is?

A law demanding the honour of maternal parentage is fine, it helps to cement the tribe and define who is "one of the tribe", but demanding paternal honour makes no sense.

You need to change either the culture or the rule - personally I would suggest changing the rule and leaving the culture alone

Apart from that this is extremely good - 4/5
February 1, 2006, 16:59
You and Scras are finding all those little inconsistencies, aren't you. It'll get fixed eventually.
February 15, 2006, 6:35
Actually, that could be slightly metaphorical - the command speaks generically of The Old And Wise - and since all the older males could have been father, you've got to show respect to all of them, buddy!

Aside: anyone that is so old as to have adult grandchildren is of a venerable age, and should he keep to the commandments, then he will be wise as skillful - a source of wisdom for the young ones.
Voted MoonHunter
February 2, 2006, 14:11
Can you link all these up. Sure we can follow the freetext, but not everyone knows how to do that.
February 2, 2006, 19:18
You're so demanding, you know that Moon. First you demand originality, then you demand usability, then you start saying that it needs to look nice. What next, do you want me to have little green demon things dancing around it?
February 2, 2006, 20:17
Now everybody chill..
Voted Murometz
February 14, 2006, 21:17
YR. So unlike the typical gods of fantasy. I'd be scared to piss him off!

repetitive comment- very old testamentish

Voted valadaar
May 16, 2014, 13:05

How do you pronounce Yr? Yaaar? Yer? Ear? :)

A very good desert god!

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Random Idea Seed View All Idea Seeds

Hooper McFin's Two Shot Portal

       By: dudeington

Now, this ol' ramblin fellow tends to walk his talk a bit too far down the train sometimes.. So I'll be brief in my recantin' of how it was my Tavern "came to bein'" on the multiverse as a weave of it's own spell.. And how I'm even alive to tell the story!

You see it's simple really, trust me.. that's my specialty, keepin it elementary. And you can trust this old Bard.

Anyway, this one night these wizards get a ramblin' on about the temporal exististance of space and time and how it could be manifested in a weave of super dimensional space. whereupon the folded space would give rise to an infinite number of entrances and exits to one or many spaces. Now, seein' how my talkin' sometimes get's locked into the way us folks used to talk back in the ol' west. These wizards didn't know I was a master of the word. and I had heard everything they said. They were also a bit over the wagon, while I was steerin' the show.

So that's how it came to pass, I struck a bargain with the wizards. They come to me in the morning and conjure up their idea into reality and I'd pledge them my life, my existance.. in essence my soul. but in a much nicer sense of the word. So they came by in the morning a half remembering our talks the prior evenin'. And I recanted their words verbatum, and that's how it came to be. The spell was complete that afternoon. My tavern would be the super dimensional cube that would exist in this weave of space and time, folks could come and go as they please, knowin in mind some of the rules and limitations set forth.

A few of 'em as follows.

No feller can be causin a ruckus inside any of my fine establishments, as always rule number one god damnit.

n' second the portal works kinda tricky. When ya outside ya cast the spell and lend your will to luck a bit and regardless the doors to the bar will appear, the windows a luminescent amber.. you can hear the chattee but ya can't see in. And the catch is the door might be locked, in which case you chalk it up to lady luck and go walk off and try again in an hour. Now most times the door pops right open and from the outside you always come in the front door, immediately greeted by myself or one of our many fine patrons of Hooper McFin's Ale & Steakhouse.

Now when ya cast the spell from inside the Tavern, another catch comes up. The back door is mainly a secret for the non-initiated staff and the regulars but for sake of the prose let's assume we all know there's a secret door in the back with a portal there. Now when you go on through this one, you got two scenario's you oughta be aware of. One is ya pop outside relative to the same spot you came out. The other is, you walk back on into this one or another of our many Hooper McFin's Ale & Steakhouse.

so it's a clever quantum railroad I got my tavern and my people's caught on. But, Hey the show's sure as always goin. ohhh' rutin tootin skidoodle -

** And that's it.. that's the only notes I found on the spell, apparently out there somewhere is a Tavern caught on the mighty ebb and flow of the multiverse. Well. at least I can put to rest my torment as to the condition now referred to as "Hooper McFin's Teleportation Paranoia".

Dr. Clarke T. Mulligan - Professional researcher of Time & Space.

Hooper McFin's Ale & Steakhouse

Ideas  ( System ) | June 21, 2015 | View | UpVote 4xp

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