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March 18, 2008, 11:56 am

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101 Post Apocalyptic Cults

By:

Some of the more bizarre cults which could conceivably be found in a post apocalyptic setting

I’ve always had a fondness for some of the strange groups and cults that tend to spring up in post apocalyptic settings. For some reason I forget now, I once decided to see about creating a whole bunch of such groups. I decided to go for a mix of serious, crazy, bizarre, and pun-based cults just to see what kinds of strange stuff I could come up with. This list is the result.

01 Aliens
This group of cultists believes that a great queen will give them rebirth as powerful agents of darkness.

02 Ambulance Chasers
These, strangely well-dressed, though disheveled cultists follow battlefields and congregate at accident sites to engage in strange discourse and arguments.

03 Ape Supremacists
Anthropomorphic/Alien/Mutant primates who advocate a caste system where primates control the world. Each type of primate (ape, orangutan, gorilla, monkey, etc) naturally advocates that itself be the top caste.

04 Area 51ers
A strange cult who are looking for the "Lost Area 51 - a gateway to peaceful contact with the universe."

05 Bilbo Thumpers
These cultists speak a strange language, and have a fondness for elves, dwarves, and halflings, they are on a quest to find and destroy "The One Ring."

06 Blood Gang
Remnants of the former street gang notable for their red-colored clothing an emnity with the Cryps Gang (qv).

07 Blue Brothers
This strange group of cultists wear dark suits and sunglasses, and engage in smoking, drinking, and playing music.

08 Blue Faerie Cult
These cultists worship blue fairies and use the word "smurf" in place of adjectives.

09 Cats
A strange group of anthropomorphic symboled cultists who are trying to take over the world.

10 Church of the King
This cult worships a strange mythical deity known variously as "The King," "Elvis," "The Great Press Lee" and believe that everyone should be cast in his image. They can be found in strange costumes, with strange hairstyles, sunglasses, and either singing or talking in strange cant.

11 Coke Gang
Red-garbed worshipers who would "Like to buy the world a coke" to bring peace. Often mistaken for the Blood Gang or Reds, this cult’s symbology is usually composed of unknown words in a flowing script.

12 Cryps Gang
Remnants of the former street gang notable for their blue-colored clothing an emnity with the Blood Gang (qv).

13 Cult of Jak’s Son
Often enemies of the Madonnas, this cult dresses in red clothing and wears one white glove. They too search for a legendary messiah, the one known as "Mikel."

14 Cult of the Gazebo
These cultists worship strange temples, a freestanding roofed structure or belvedere, usually open on the sides.

15 Cult of Neo
This cult opposes all computers and robots, claiming that they are tools meant to enslave humanity. They seek the Matrix, an item believed to hold the location of "Zion" where they can live free of the computers and robots forever.

16 Cult of Akira
These cultists, often psychics, seek the mythical greatest psychic of all, one known only as "Akira", who they believe will be able to destroy the world in order to recreate a more peaceful utopia.

17 Cult of the Wise Man
Who the Wise Man is exactly is the subject of some (relatively peaceful) debate among this cult. He is known for his wise sayings however, many of which are found in artifacts known as "Fortune Cookies"

18 Cult of Cthullu
This cult believes that a great old one, known as Cthullu, is imprisoned in a hidden city at the bottom of the sea and by freeing him they can unleash a new apocalypse. Minions of Lords of the Deep attack these cultists on site, resulting in some strange rumors that Cthullu was imprisoned by the Lord of the Deep.

19 Cult of the Computer
This cult believes that computers are divine manifestations or angels, sent to guide mankind into a peaceful existence. They worship items such as "The Holy Circuits" and "Divine Logic".

20 Cylons
This group believes that a race of robots, known only for being silver and having a single red eye that moves back and forth across the face will bring them to a promised land known only as "Battlestar Galactica."

21 Dee Aitch Tees
This yellow-garbed mail cult is fairly small, but carries on a fierce battle with the Messengers of the Ups and the Fedexers.

22 Donkeyicans
Donkey worshiping/symbolized advocators of something called "the republic."

23 East Coast Gang
This musical cult believes that they are supperior to the West Coast Gang. Typically found dressed (and often confused with) similar to Cryps Gang and Blood Gang.

24 Elephantocrats
Elephant worshiping/symbolized advocators of something called "democracy."

25 Ess Sea Ay Cult
A group of knight cultists who favor a fairly simple life.

26 Ex-Mass Cult
This cult believes that a benevolent deity, known as Saint Claws lives in the far north, a semi-mythical place known as the "Pole" where he rules over the peaceful Toy Elves and Flying Rudolphs.

27 Fast Foot Joint Worshipers
These cultists can be found just about anywhere, worshiping a strange icon, roll 1D8 on the following table:
        1 Golden Arches
        2 Jack
        3 Ronald McDonald
        4 The King
        5 Ovenmitt
        6 White Castle
        7 The Colonel
        8 The Taco Bell

28 Fedexers
Another mail cult which wears blue & white clothing and have an ongoing war with the Messengers of the Ups and Dee Aitch Tees.

29 Filkers
Traveling Bards who make up their own songs.

30 Followers of the Book
Cultists whose bible is a worn book with large friendly letters saying "Don’t Panic."

31 Freemen
This cult prefers to live in deserts and is searching for the lost messiah "Muad’dib."

32 Ghost Busters
This cult always dresses in grey jump suits and have the symbol of a white amorphous creature, with a red circle and line across the creature. They tend to use particle beam weapons in their quest to rid the world of supernatural creatures.

33 Godzilla/Gojira Cults
These opposing cults (Godzilla and Gojira) both believe that a giant lizard- or dinosaur-like dragon (depending on the cult) will return one day to destroy all that is evil.

34 Goths
Black-clothed advocators of "angst."

35 Grail Seekers
These cultists seek something called "The Holy Grail" and debate whether or not King Arthur of the Britons, King Excalibur, Indiana Jones, or MacGuyver found it, as the reason for it’s hidden location.

36 Great White Cult
This cult worships a great white being, believed to be the source of all goodness. Roll 1D4 for specific being;
        1 Michelin Man
        2 Stay Puft Marshmallow Man
        3 Mr Clean
        4 Pillsbury Doughboy

37 Greens
Green-clothed, peace-symboled advocators of something called "recycling."

38 Greys
This cult is looking for the mythical race of beings known as "Greys."

39 Hell’s Angels
A motorcycle gang that travels the world looking for a good time.

40 Holy Order of the Jedi
A new cult religion that believes an "All-powerful Force" ties everything together and provides supernatural powers

41 Idolators
These cultists are often found in ruins, worshiping some object or other, roll 1D4 for random idol to worship:
        1 Statue (may or may not be a real statue)
        2 Product Mascot (such as a statue of a mascot)
        3 Strange Building
        4 Monument      

42 Illinois Nazis
This cult dresses in Nazi uniforms and are human supremacists. They seem to be hunting a particular group of people known as the "Blue Brothers."

43 Jihad Group
Unwashed desert-dwellers with a picture advocating some pre-apocalypse semi-mythical figure, roll for 1D6 to determine figure:
        1 Ayatolla Komeni
        2 Omar Quaddafi
        3 Saddam Hussein
        4 Osama Bin Laden
        5 Yassir Arafat
6 Hafez al-Assad

44 Kings’ Cult
Worshipers of something called the "Kings of Freedom" including Malcolm X(roman numeral), Martin Luther King, Rodney King, Nelson Mandela, and the Reverend Jesse Jackson

45 Knight Riders
This cult of knights is typically found using robotic vehicles given speech synthesizers and a strange computer program which actually makes it seem like the robot has a mind of its own.

46 Knightly Order of the Dinner Table
These strange knight cultists travel the world causing as much trouble as they can. Often found fighting with bags, food, and attacking the lesser creatures of the earth, such as rats, beggars, the blind, urchins, etc.

47 Knights Who Say Ni!
These knight cultists are on a quest to find the mythical "Shrubbery."

48 Knights Who Say Meh
These knight cultists are very rarely encounter because they don’t really care.

49 Kosplay Kult
These cultists dress up as anthropomorphics and other strange-looking characters (often with large eyes, spikey hair, odd-colored hair and other oddities).

50 Lagomorphs
This cult worships a variety of rabbits and bunnies, who they believe hold the secret of life. Due to internal factionalization, the specific cult will depend on who is considered to hold the secret (roll 1D6);
        1 Roger Rabbit
        2 Easter Bunny
        3 Bugs the Bunny
        4 Trix the Rabbit
        5 Bun-Bun the Bunny
        6 Playboy Bunny

51 LARPers
This cult is often confused with the Vampire Cult or the Ess Sea Ay Cult. No one knows what this cult is really advocating.

52 Lost Vegans
These cultists are in search of the fabled city of "Vegas" which is believed to have all manner of delights.

53 Lucky Charms Cult
This cult believes that by collecting certain holy items such as, green clovers, yellow moons, blue stars, purple horseshoes, red hearts, and pink balloons, they can summon forth "Lucky the Leprechaun" who will give them limitless wealth.

54 Madonnas
Another (often) female cult, this one dresses in strange attire, searching for the "Great Madonna" a legendary singer.

55 Magic Eight Ball Prophets
This cult relies on a ‘mystic’ object known as the "Magic 8 Ball" to make predictions of the future.

56 Messengers of the Ups (pronounced "ups")
These cultists favor carrying messages, mail, and packages between the remaining communities. They are always garbed in brown and have an ongoing war with the Fedexers and Dee Aitch Tees.

57 MIBs (Also known as Men In Black; pronounced "mibs," rhymes with "bibs")
This group of suit & sunglasses wearing cultists is another cult dedicated to the eradication of supernatural creatures.

58 Monopoly of the Computer
A strange cult which worships the strange entity know as "Mike Row Soft" which is believed to have the ability to control everything. Worshipers in this cult often attack other cults with the battlecry of "Resistance is Futile."

59 Mouth Parkers
This group of cultists advocates a variety of strange things, worshiping deities including; Soul Chef, Mister M’Kay, The Fat One, Kenny the Always Dying, Kyle the Jew, and Stan the Man. They tend to attack people at the slightest provocation, saying "They’re coming right for us!" and seem to be on a quest to destroy the "Canadans."

60 Munchkins
These cultists advocate being as powerful as possible. They seek artifacts and devices which will give them power over others.

61 Necro-Satan Worshipers
These cultists are currently in a religious schism over whether the Necronomicon is the true bible or the Satanic Bible is the true bible.

62 Overfiends
This cult believes that the sacrifice of enough females will result in the rebirth of the great "Urotsukidoji" who will remake the world into a peaceful utopia.

63 Pepsi Gang
Blue-clothed worshipers who are violently opposed to the Coke Gang. While they favor blue clothing, the shades chosen are generally lighter than those of the Cryps Gang, and their symbology tends to resemble a red & blue yin-yang symbol.

64 Pikachus
This yellow-garbed cult seeks the lost secrets of the "Polka Man."

65 Pink Brain Cultists
Another group of crazed cultists, who worship the icon of two mice, one short, the other tall. They also desire to take over the world.

66 Pirates
A host of a wide number of sub-cults, roll (1D12) on the following:
        1 Buck and Ears: These pirates favor the classic "pirate" look, with earrings, eye patches, peg legs, hooks, pet parrots and monkeys, etc.
        2 Captain Hook’s Pirates: These pirates believe that a demon known as "Pan" and his "Lost Boys" will do them in.
        3 Captain Morgan’s Pirates: These pirates tend to be great party-goers and party throwers.
        4 Caribbean Pirates: Looking for the great captain "Jack Sparrow" they also tend to fight undead.
        5 Cutthroat Islanders: Any pirate cult led by a woman, generally derided.
        6 Dark Water Pirates: Looking for 13 lost treasures.
        7 Dread Pirates: These pirates believe in love and are always lead by a "Captain Roberts."
        8 Flynn’s Pirates: the most flamboyant of the pirate bands, they tend to flavor acrobatic moves and flashy sword play.
        9 Ice Pirates: These pirates make use of fighting robots in their search for ice.
        10 Penzance Pirates: seem more interested in singing and looking for the mythical "Modern Major General."
        11 The Beards: Depending on the specific cult, the leader is a venerated person with a Blue Beard, Red Beard, Black Beard, White Beard, Yellow Beard, etc.
        12 Treasure Islanders: These pirates belive that a great silver pirate will help them find a secret island full of treasure.

67 Predators
These cultists are a warrior-cult who believes that if they prove themselves worthy, they will be given powers such as nightvision, invisibility, invincible armor, energy and other weapons of power, etc.

68 Punks
A cult adorned with tattoos, piercings, ripped leather & denim clothing, loud music.

69 Purple Love Cult
This cult Worships a strange purple dinosaur that sings of love and understanding.

70 Quakers
Also known as Counter-strikers, Doomers, Rampagers, Half-Lifes, Nuke’ems, Rainbow Sixers, (among others). These militarists tend to attack everything on site with a vast variety of weapons, looking for "Power Ups" and "Key Cards."

71 Red Shirts
This group of suicidal cultists is another variant of the Trekkies. They can be found committing suicide in just about any situation.

72 Reds
Red-clothed, sickle & hammer-symboled advocators of something called "communism." Their red-colored clothing may make them easily mistaken for the Blood Gang or Coke Gang, but closer exampination will reveal their use of the yellow sickle and hammer for symbology.

73 Robocops
A borg cult who worship the great "Murphy" (often resulting in them being confused with the Worshipers of Murphy), they follow four commandments.
1. Uphold the Law.
2. Protect the Public Trust.
3. ? (This commandment is unknown.)
4. Preserve OCP (who or what OCP is they have no clue).

74 Robotechers
This cult believes that a race of giant aliens will invade the planet and quests for the secret of transformable aircraft in order to stop them.

75 Roleplayers
This cult advocates freeform expression and is violently opposed to the Rollplayer cult.

76 Rollplayers
This cult advocates numbers and mathematics, directly opposing the Roleplayer cult.

77 Rules Lawyers
This cult advocates slavishly following the rules (any rules), oddly, their fervent belief seems to only apply to rules that directly benefit them.

78 Scooby’s Gang (also known as Those Meddlesome Kids)
This cult, often found with a variety of clothing, including a white shirt with red ascot, orange sweater, green shirt, and one or more members dressed as brown canines, travels the world attempting to solve "mysteries."

79 Searchers for the Truth
This cult claims to be "Eff Bee Eye Agents assigned to the X-Files" in search of alien life. They worship the deities "Mulder" and "Scully" and oppose a host of demons known, including "The Smoking Man," "The Bounty Hunter" and search for the lost hero "Deep Throat" who will lead them to the promised land.

80 Spammers
Another strange communications cult, these send out messages about "Penis Enlargement," "Cheap Home Loans," and other nefarious plots.

81 Sprite Knights
These knight cultists wear green armor and advocate "Obeying your thirst."

82 Suess is Goose
A very strange cult worshiping a being known only as "The Cat in the Hat" who is opposed by an evil green monster known as "The Grinch". They believe that by eating a holy food known as "Green Eggs and Ham" they can discover the true nature of "The Cat in the Hat".

83 Teenage Ninjas of the Turtle
This cult of green-garbed martial fighters often wear red (or other colored) headbands, and search for the great "Splinter" who will teach them the "Secrets of Ninjitsu". They are opponents of a feared group known as "The Foot" led by the evil "Shredder". Note: The Flip Out Ninja are often mistaken for "The Foot" and these two groups generally attack each other on sight.

84 Telemarketers
A strange cult that is always trying to sell something. They are usually encountered by using electronic communication means (radio, cell phones, etc) to contact other people. No one knows where they are from.

85 The Cult of Lee
These cultists all advocate strange martial arts and talk in a strange manner, where their lips move before any sound is heard.

86 The Cult of Kirk
These bizarre variant of the Trekkies cult talk in long, drawn-out, melodramatic statements about "We…Come…in…Peace" and other strange topics.

87 The Cult of Ash
These cultists worship a strange, time-traveling, demon-fighting, irreverent hero known as "Ash the King." They tend to talk in bizarre messages such as, "Hail to the King, Baby," "This is my boom-stick," and "Good, bad, I’m the guy with the gun."

88 The Flip Out Ninjas
This group of black-clad cultists insists on three things for membership:
1. All Flip Out Ninjas must be mammals
2. Flip Out Ninjas must kill people.
3. Flip Out Ninjas must be totally sweet.

89 The Silent Believers
This cult, which rarely talks, worships a strange pair of deities, known only as "Silent Bob" and "Jay."

90 The Simplesons
A group of cultists who advocate a variety of strange things, they all worship what little they know of a strange pantheon of deities including; The Great Doh!, She of the Blue Hair, The Irreverent One, The Smart One, Little Pacifier and tend to curse or otherwise avoid their deities’ foes, the Comic Book Guy, Stupid Sheriff, The Clawed One (and his minion, Butt Kisser), Bob, and The Crusty Clown.

91 The Sopranos
Oddly, not involved in music at all, these cultists favor staid suits and act as criminals. They speak in a strange dialect.

92 The Who
A group of worshipers on the look out for a being known only as "The Doctor," believed to travel the universe in a strange booth. Why they are searching for "The Doctor" is unknown.

93 Trekkies
Often mistaken for the Cult of Kirk members, this group is known for wearing strange costumes and masks which represent strange, alien creatures. They are also found wielding a wide variety of strange objects as weapons, and may be found speaking in a strange argot.

94 Valley Bunnies
This female only cult is all about beauty and discusses superficial things in a strange slang. They are searching for something called "The Mall."

95 Vampire Cult
Wannabe vampires, often confused with members of the Goths cult. They parade around in dark clothing, with lots of white and red makeup, as well as prosthetic fangs, gathering in small groups or covens.

96 West Coast Gang
This musical cult believes that they are supperior to the East Coast Gang. Typically found dressed in lots of chains and necklaces of gold, referred to as "Bling".

97 Wonderful World of Disney
Cultists in this group worship a wide variety of anthropomorphics; "Mickey (mouse)," "Donald (duck)," "Minnie, consort of Mickey (mouse)," "Daisy, consort of Donald (duck)," "Goofy (dog?)," etc. They are on a quest to find the fabled "Disneyland."

98 Wonkas
This cult believes that everlasting life can be found in a hidden location known only as "The Chocolate Factory."

99 Worshipers of Murphy
This pessimistic cult firmly believes in something known as Murphy’s Law.

100 Zigspeakers
These cultists speak in a strange variant of American/English and search out a cult known as the "Cats."



Additional Ideas (1)

101) The Cult of Nintendo- A cult dedicated to seeking out anient relics of a bygone-age known as "video games" and building their skill with them. Members of the cult (known as The sons of Mario for the menfolk and Daughters of Peach for the women) spend much of their days playing the the cults ample library of video games, seeking out new video-games and other relics, and learning of past conflicts in video-game history (of particular interest was the battle between Nintendo and Sega)

102) The Zygomatic Order- A bizare cult, who teach that fungus is the paragon of life and all life but fungus will die out in the near future. To avoid this, members of the order "Join the fungus", promoting fungal growth in their bodies. While either grotesque or eerily beutiful the apearance of cult members ranges from "slightly moldy" to "overgrown with fungus" to the extreme "Giant ambulatory fungus". The Zygomatic Order worship a wise entity known as Grandfather Fungus, a sagacious figure, who generously shares his "children" (fungi) with the world
0xp

2009-12-04 08:05 AM » Link: [4889#72968|text]
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Comments ( 16 )
Commenters gain extra XP from Author votes.

Voted Dozus
March 11, 2008, 21:19
0xp
Ha! Love it! An excellent interpretation of a variety of potential cults. Well done.
Voted Scrasamax
March 11, 2008, 22:32
0xp
hats off to the Knights who say Meh! My absolute favorite.
Voted Murometz
March 11, 2008, 22:53
0xp
62 is nice, for that old-fashioned feel. But yes, the Knights who say Meh simply rock. Fun roll on 43 too :)

very nicely done. Witty and entertaining!
Voted valadaar
March 12, 2008, 9:26
0xp
An excellent assortment of oddities!

Must destroy Cult 69!!!!!
Voted manfred
March 12, 2008, 15:52
0xp
I was mildly amused. :)

Note: we have here this neat freetext of 101... with a teeny little amount of more work, you could add it to this submission.
Voted Cheka Man
March 12, 2008, 17:56
0xp
This is such a good submission and so entertaining. I love it. 5/5 and an HOH.
bouchermark654
October 28, 2010, 15:33
0xp
ya this is a nice thought


Glasses Caravan Guide
Voted Kassil
March 14, 2008, 5:53
0xp
I just about fell out of my chair laughing. This is definitely a chart that's both useful and comedic at the same time. The jab at the Knights of the Dinner Table was particularly priceless.
Voted mrcelophane
March 17, 2008, 13:28
0xp
5/5 Greatness in a can

For 101: Pi Cult

They worship a strange symbol. They wait for the world to be rulled by it. They say it will bring about "Change without end"
Kassy
July 12, 2008, 9:08
0xp
Excellent i love it.
Kassy
August 1, 2008, 6:25
0xp
The red shirts kick ass.
Fallen Angel
September 7, 2008, 22:46
0xp
You Fail. 42 should be the cult of 42
Murometz
December 1, 2009, 13:14
0xp
Bump to some funny stuff. If only the headers were bolded...

I'd do it for you, but it seems a task too monumental for the likes of me :p
Murometz
January 6, 2010, 11:22
0xp
BUMP. Could be used to mine ideas for Zombie Quest
Murometz
December 22, 2010, 22:41
0xp

I thought that MoonHunter was the King of OCD. But it is you, Kuseru, it is you :D

 

This is great! 

Voted Orouboros
March 22, 2012, 0:26
Only voted

Freetext

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