Full Item Description
Novascream is a musical instrument, patterned roughly after the Fender Stratocaster guitar of ancient legend. Carefully aligned and tuned laser-strings play perfect notes both through the light speakers installed on the guitar itself, and transmits them to the nearby (or not so nearby...) speaker stacks. Several more carefully aligned transmitters on the side of the 'axe' make it into a literal laser axe, the heavy alloy instrument doubling as a massively impressive implement of destruction.
Long ago, one Thorin Stardust, a Salvorathan with a musical bent and an axe to grind, sought out Kir Ironspirit and told him, "Dude. I need some stuff from you. I like, need a way better axe, and I need something to, like, kill the over-enthusiastic xenomorph fans we've got... I mean, I dun wanna be eaten by a groupie any more than the next guy."
It was with a great chuckle that Kir reached out and gripped the space-dwarf around the shoulders, waving his hand up into the sky with a twisted smile. "I have just the idea for you. Let's go talk what you'll do for me..."
And so, it was created, and delivered. It was promptly put into use at the Concert of the Battle of Squithiois VIII, where the legends began...
It's an axe that plays music. It's an axe that chops off people's heads. Somehow, some twisted feat of engineering has produced this, and it very, very rarely needs retuning. Doom comes, and it comes with a power chord. Now, are. You. Ready. To. ROCK?!?
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? Responses (11)-11
Concert of the Battle of Squithiois VIII
'You should have seen us when we played on Venus!'
There was a thread for music inspired submissions somewhere :)
Heh, good job!
makes me think of Disaster Area from the Restaurant at the End of the Universe
Dwarves are so metal. \''/
*strums a powerchord*
Anyway, folks, just FYI: There's a character this goes with coming out of a scroll that's currently in progress. You /may/ want to suspend judgement until then, I was just writhing in the grip of my demon-muse last night, and couldn't wait to get this out.
lol, I like this. Not good for ambushing with.
It is enough to make one snort soda out of their nose laughing so hard.
I am normally not a fan of metal, but I would like to see this group play. Move over Ozzie!
::incomprehensible british-drug-induced-babble::...massivelyawesomeguitar...::continued incomprehensible babble::...is righteous."
Seriously though. Short, sweet, very humerous and exceedingly witty.
I simply read it with my mouth hanging open. Demon-muse just about sums it up!