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NPCs
Minor
Natural
2.55
10 Votes

14xp


Hits: 4236
Comments: 6
Ideas: 0
Rating: 2.55
Condition: Normal
ID: 967

Submitted:

Updated:
November 6, 2005, 3:01 pm

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Ti'Klund

By:

After 25 years of the nightmares of the destruction of his village, he is back. Back again to strive for revenge and cleanse the nightmares from his sleep.

Special Equipment:

“Eclipse”-A jet-black short bow that hits with blinding force
“Shariga”-a silver scimitar that can cut through any metal and does extra damage to humans.

Appearance:

Pale, almost milky white skin with silver hair that shines in the moonlight. Crudely sewn animal skins form an outer layer of warmth over a black shirt. On his neck hangs a neckless with fangs from large predators, and small animal’s bones make bracelets around his wrist. Thin in build, and not very muscular, scars and teeth marks line his arms and legs as battle wounds. Around his waist are leather pouches and across his back is a quiver.

Background:

At the mere age of 4, Ti’Klund watched in horror as his hometown was set aflame. Drunken humans roared in laughter and delight while setting houses and spiritual totems on fire. He watched as men grabbed the women of his village and did what they pleased with them, while others cut the throats of the men. Ti’Klund rushed through the chaos to his home, where his mother and father , both village healers, were nailed to the walls. He screamed, and soon after began to sob; but his mother hushed him.

  “Ti’Klund, shhh, listen to me, my son. You have amazing potential with nature and will be one of the most successful druids of all time,” her voice rasped,“Promise me, my son, promise me that you will never come back here. Now go, run!” As Ti’Klund got up and started to back towards the entrance, his mother’s eyes stared up, and her head went limp. He turned and ran, tears cascading down his face, and he never looked back.

  When what seemed hours passed, Ti stopped on the top of a small mountain, gazing over the forest. Through the dense trees, he could still see the flames blazing their fury and rising to the heavens. Remembering his mother’s words, he set off.

  25 years passed, and Ti’Klund had proved to be one of the most powerful druids. His elemental powers far surpassed the ones the elders of his village had cast, and his communication with nature gave him the first friends he ever had. Animals of the woods came to him and taught him their ways of survival, where prime hunting grounds were, and how to feel animal-like emotions. After extensive practicing, Ti’Klund found a way to transform into a wolf, though it took much time. He had become one with nature, and enjoyed every moment of it. But he still had the nightmares. Nightmares of the drunken men’s faces, contorting with laughter at the fleeing druids and gambling their money by shooting them with arrows. The nightmares never ceased, and the haunting look of his mother’s limp face always woke him screaming. It was time to cease these dreams.

From then on, Ti’Klund strived to hunt down the people and the kin of the people who so barbarically destroyed his village, family, and childhood. When leaving the pack of wolves that he grew up with, they presented him with a short bow. One called the Eclipse. One hit from an arrow shot by the eclipse would knock down the enemy with such force that it would blind him. He has carried it in memory of them.


Roleplaying Notes:

Though usually neutral in personality, he can shift to evil when in the presence of humans.
The bow he carries isn’t one commonly used among druids, but specially designed for him. It deals no penalties to him.
Spells:
Flare- blinds enemies for 1 turn in a 20ft radius with a tremendous light and deals 1d20 dmg to them in the first 10 feet. it deals 1d6 to those who are beyond.
Cyclone wall-makes a wall of wind 5ft ahead of the druid that enemies cannot penetrate with missile weapons or magic. Enemies cannot pass through it either.
Arctic Blast-A hail storm of giant snowflakes that act like razor blades. The flakes go directly forward 40ft and deal 1d20 damage and an additional 2d4 cold damage.
Transformation:
Werewolf-Attack and health double while in werewolf form. Cannot use magic or missile weapons, but uses unarmed damage with claws.
Weapons:
Eclipse- does 1d10 damage and blinds for 3 turns
Shariga- does 1d6 damage, but does 2d6 to humans



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Comments ( 6 )
Commenters gain extra XP from Author votes.

MoonHunter
April 6, 2004, 0:16
0xp
Okay. Lets try this from the top.

First I want you to read what passes for a character entry here. After you see what is highly rated and what we pan, then post your character.

As for the nuts and bolts.

Punctuation. Okay. Capitalization. Fail. Spelling. Pass.

This is not a terribly cliche character but it is close, so we will give you at least some merit on character creation.

However, the character should not be posted in first person, as this character is one that you are posting up for everyone in the world to use, not you to use (on this site anyways). Have you seen any other character posted in first person (on this site)?

From there, I need you to answer, who, what, where, when, and why for every aspect of your character.

The character's history is too spartan, too incomplete to be useful to anyone. Why this might be sufficient for a poorly run play by forum game, it will not fly here.

The character's powers are okay, as far as they go. However, you need to explain what they are, how they manifest themselves, how they look in the game, and who you learned them from. Does your character snap her finger and poof she is an animal, or is it a long and dragged out process like Werewolf in London, or does it require mystic totem items and a fire to dance about?

Firepoker of ass kicking. This is where your character fails. It is not even funny. It is enough to make us just want to delete your obvious joke post immediately.

So. There is a lot of fix here. The question we ask is, "Are you going to do it?"

As for the rest of you, stop lamenting how bad this character is. Put one biHELPFUL AND non critical/i/b comment up here, and leave it alone. If they fix it, we keep it. If they do not, it will quietly fade away into the deleted file, not even worth the electrons it takes to store it.
CaptainPenguin
April 7, 2004, 16:24
0xp
What the hell?!
What happened to the character that was here before?
This is definitely an improvement. Ignore my above comment.
I just have to say that the backstory is fairly good, but not all that original.
Also:
"Thin in complextion". You mean thin in build. Complection is the general color and texture and such of the skin. For instance, this character's complection is "pale, almost milky white".
Not bad. Definitely an improvement.

3/5.
Grevenon
April 7, 2004, 18:26
0xp
thanks. sorry, i'll change it to build. thats what i meant.
Shadoweagle
April 7, 2004, 19:52
0xp
Much improved, Grevenon :-) I revise my vote to 3/5. Keep up the posting, and remember to try and make it original, and with depth.
MoonHunter
April 8, 2004, 0:31
0xp
Yes. This is exactly what we were talking about. Our hearts sing with joy. I gave you a vote of 5 to help offset all the previous low votes.

There are some cliche elements (orphans of a wiped out village are SOOOO overdone). However, the increase in depth and development make up for it.

I would of liked to see a bit more about his motivations, personality, and how he interact with his world (humans and other druids).

Other than that, you get a gold star for this character.
Voted valadaar
May 17, 2013, 20:31
0xp
Some interesting bits, though offing the parents cuts out soo much storytelling.

Let your GM off them!


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