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Comments: 3
Ideas: 0
Rating: 2.2
Condition: Normal
ID: 857


January 15, 2006, 12:45 pm

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A knight of the dragon god zandragaal, memeber of the dragonwright.

Special Equipment:

The red sword of zandragaal :magic red sword that inflicts fire damage and can’t be destroyed, and the helm of zandragaal : dragon breath, fire dmg .


A tall human (1.90) with black hair and brown eyes in red double mail armor and a shield with the symbol of the dragonwright and a dragon skull helmet symbol of his god.(according the legend this skull was made by zandragaal itself forge in the depths of the dragon mountains.)


After searching for the lost treasures of the dragonwright ifrid settle down in the dragon mountains. He and his army biuld a keep to protect the treasures of his god (the god of ifrid is the symbol of war) then he started a new quest, he is after the church of the black rose (styphons the black church) and their holy sword (zandragaal sent him to start a new war with the black church ) and he will never rest until he starts the 3rd holy war with the black church and finally destroys the church and brings peace to the yin-sloth jungle.(his home and home of the dragon wright).

Roleplaying Notes:

No spells , he is psionic like all the knights of the dragonwright. He has a psy sword as power and spontaneous combustion, (he is arrogant but a good guy he will always help others and work fine in team, he is fanatic if anyone said something about his god or the dragonwright he enter in berserk and kill the infidel!!!)

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Comments ( 3 )
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February 6, 2003, 20:13
A knoght of the dragon god zandragaal ,memeber of the dragonwright.

sorry i mean knight of the dragon god zandragaal and member of the dragonwright.
Voted Chaosmark
November 11, 2005, 11:38
In the interest of helping a newer member, I'm going to post and vote upon this. Hopefully my advice will be taken to heart.

1) Run the post through a spell checker. Yes, it takes an extra 30 seconds, however, it can make a post that much more readable.

2) Work on your grammar. Some of the tenses are mixed and jumbled, and that alone will take a full point off your rating.

3) While I think that he has potential as a character, at the moment he just seems...Lifeless. He's there, he has the big bad weapon, and he has the special abilities. What he doesn't really seem to have is anything more than a superficial background. What, for example, are the Lost Treasures of the Dragonwright? What is the Church of the Black Rose? What the heck is the Dragonwright anyway? These are things that you might know, but we have no clue who or what they are. Explain explain explain.
Voted valadaar
December 12, 2006, 19:51
Another example of what NOT to post....

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Ideas  ( Dungeons ) | January 20, 2004 | View | UpVote 3xp

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