The Nasgareth may look like elves, but instead were created by an entirely different divine being, which admired the elvish looks and traits, but wanted to create his own army instead. One without Love.
Nasgareth look very similar to elves, except they rarely stand higher than 6 feet tall. Also, they have been created with a dark aura surrounding them at all times, causing them to be able to melt into even the smallest of shadows effortlessly. Pointy ears are present, though not so prevalent as natural elves, and they have hair blacker than the night. Female and male Nasgareth wear a long braid all the way down their backs. As for clothing, every Nasgareth wears the Gar'rien, a dark purple outfit of loose fitting pants and a cloak.
The Nasgareth may look like elves, but instead were created by an entirely different divine being, which admired the elvish looks and traits, but wanted to create his own army instead. Created by this man, Trialistin (Try-all-ist-tin), they began walking the universe over 10,000 years after the time of the elves. Living on their home world of Diadrian (Dye-add-re-en) until they had settled into their respective roles, they were then gifted with interplanetary travel by Trialistin in order to carry out his will. Unfortunately, the blood lust given them was slightly lost when they arrived on the planet Yemael (Yee-may-all) and were exposed to a new emotion they were never meant to feel: love. While they still hunger for battle, they were no longer merciless killers, and broke free of their bond to Trialistin to become their own society. In their wandering after this, they stumbled upon what is now known as the sacred fires of the Nasgareth, an eternal flame emitting the same dark aura they themselves posses. While they were immune to its touch, any other species would be instantly inflicted with a dark sickness, seeming fine on the outside, but slowly gloom would creep into their minds until it overwhelmed them, and they just gave up on living and died. This place became the home world of the Nasgareth, and was affectionately named Harianle (Hair-ee-an-el) after the maiden they met on Yemael who died helping them escape Trialistin's grasp.
Weaponry: Nasgareth warriors believe fiercely in only 3 weapons, and to use anything else is unheard of. (The only warrior ever to throw down his Nasgarethian blade for another weapon was skinned alive and displayed as a wall hanging for all to see.)
The Simoleth (See-moh-leth): is a sharp, slightly curved blade with a small hook on the blade near the bottom for catching an enemy spear, and a forked tip to increase thrusting damage. The blade is forged in the sacred fires of the Nasgareth by whoever is going to wield it. The blade itself is exactly as long as the users outstretched arm from shoulder to fingertip. Being forged in the fires, it also contains the dark aura, and inflicts the gloom of the fires if it strikes flesh. The hilt is of the users choosing, but generally is merely stout wood, dyed a deep purple as their Gar'rien. It is worn on their sides at all times, even while they sleep and bathe.
The Longbow: Whenever it is truly needed, a Nasgareth may sometimes pick up their fabled longbows, standing as tall as whoever wields it WHILE STRUNG! They much prefer the Simoleth, so it is a rarely used item, yet they still are deadly accurate from ranges beyond even most gunpowder weapons.
The Fiorella (Fye-oh-rell-ah) A short knife every Nasgareth wears as a compliment to their Simoleth when needed. It is nearly as rare to be used as the longbow, yet is worn at all times. While not created in the sacred fires, it does not carry the aura or gloom poisoning that the Simoleth does, yet is still dangerous in the hands of the Nasgareth.
Society: The Nasgareth have a very primitive, yet extremely stable society. The strongest are chiefs of the various clans spread throughout Harianle, while the weaker respect their leaders decisions without question. Every Nasgareth helps in the clan where he is needed, and no one ever complains. As a warrior grows in strength, his status in the clan increases. A Nasgareth is able to climb the hierarchy of the clans by challenging the creature up to 3 places higher than him/her in the ranks. This challenge is met without question, and the 2 will test their strengths in a duel (never to the death, first to draw blood is the victor). If the challenger wins, he/she is raised just above the creature he challenged. If he loses however, he is forced down to the position of cook, the lowest rank in a Nasgareth's mind. Here he/she must stay for 20 years before he/she may begin climbing the ranks again. The challenged is never affected in status by these duels except for a clan chief. If he loses he is deposed and dropped to the level of 'Master Warrior' he may never become chief again. Also, to challenge the chief, it is carried out in front of the entire clan, and he/she must have been chief for at least 10 years.
Being created as they were, the Nasgareth will not die of natural causes. Their battle lust however, has led them to obtain an average life span of merely 38 years. Females and Males are seen as equals in the clans, and indeed are nearly identical in strength.
Ranks: While the Nasgareth do not use ranks themselves, they do have a class system that must be honored by any outsiders. Within the clans however, each member of each class follows the skill-based ranking for place in command (described above).
Chief- The clan chief, commander of the clan, and leader in battle. Also the main strategist for combat and decides whether or not his/her clan will fight, and on which side. (marked by branding the symbol of the sacred fire on their blade, which is then heated and placed on their chest where the symbol is permanently branded on them.)
Master Commander- These are exceptional fighters who have proven their skills in battle at least 25 times, and have killed at least 100 enemies in a single battle. Highly honored in the tribe, and revered by the younger of the clans. (marked by a slash of lighter purple across their Garfien with the symbol of the sacred fire in the center)
Commander- Warriors who have fought in at least 5 battles and with at least 50 kills in a single battle are awarded the status of Commander. A Nasgareth must be a Commander for 5 years before he may become a Master Commander. Commanders are also the clan's assassins. Whenever a job of this nature is needed, a Commander will step up to the call. (marked by the light purple slash of the Master Commander without the symbol of the sacred flame)
Warrior- The main body of the Nasgareth tribe. Males and Females evenly create this group, and either have the same chance of becoming Commander, Master Commander, or even clan chief. They follow wherever their chief chooses to lead them without question. With no concept of slavery or servant hood, they perform their own duties as they see it needs to be done, and none have complained yet.
Cook- Whenever a challenger of a duel for status loses to his own challenge, he is subject to become a cook for 20 years. This is the lowest class seen in Nasgareth eyes, and most cooks train so fiercely during their 20 year period that they climb the ladder at an amazing rate when reinstated to make up for their fall. Cooks are forced to give up their Simoleth and Longbow when they fall, and must make new ones when they are put back into the status flow.
Master Warrior- If a chief is ever deposed of his status, he is reduced permanently to the rank of Master Warrior. This rank, alongside with those of Chief and cook are actually acknowledged by other Nasgareth inside the clan. They are allowed to keep the symbol of the sacred fire on their swords, though it must be slashed out. However, the brand on their chest must be removed. This is done by taking a hot rock and burning the mark off. It is impossible to break out of this rank, and most Master Warriors end their lives in the following battle by charging headlong into the nearest group of enemies, again and again, taking as many as they can with them in their final fight.
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? Responses (4)-4
This post is strange to me because there are several very bad things, and several very good things, an odd combination. For the bad: It is too cliched and unrealistic. Evil elves that dress in purple and wield curved swords... their name sounds like Nasgull (from LOTR). The descriptions and motivation are short and cliched.
Now, I really like a lot of the words you made up (for swords, worlds) and I like the pronounciation guides. I like where you were going when you said they found love.... it was starting to get original I thought. But then it looks like you forgot about that and went back to cliche. Also, you clearly spent a good deal of time on this post, which is good. Talking about the different ranks was good (except we don't care how many battles they have to win, we care about how rank affects how they live, etc.)
This is a long post, but still I know so little about the race. Where do they live (houses, underground?) What do they eat? Details like this, and staying as far away from cliche as possible will help you get great scores. You obviously have the ability to write and the effort to write long... just try to be a little more orginal :-)
Nazgul Zylithan, Nazgul.
Anyway, I agree with Zylithan on all his points. This post has plenty of promise but the execution of it is not always the best. If all of it had been as good as the best bits, it could have been a 5/5 post.
We may never know.
The idea is there, but needs some prodding to emerge from behind 'amateur's details'.
Too bad Sniperspy doesn't come around here anymore... I liked that kid.
Odd - thought I had voted. Interesting but it dances with clichè.