Items
Melee Weapons
Cursed
 
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Condition: In Work (public)
ID: 6413

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September 5, 2011, 4:39 pm

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Executioner

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Corrupting weapon who hunger for souls to feed its master !

History

True magic was captured in weapon many millenia ago . When first kingdoms and nations appeared . It was in time when one holy man walked the earth (it was said that he could do miracles ) , and during his violent death rift to heaven and hell opened and surges of magic runed thru the world , many new races were created that day . Some of that magic was captured in items , during centuries that magic became stronger . Thanks to that magic items , many kings expand their kingdoms , persons became heroes ,legends were made in that ancient time . Now we take closer look on one particular item who holds true magic inside , that item is corrupted by forces of darkens , and serve to manipulate and sway people .

Description

Executioner is artefakt melee weapon , who acts as gate to hell . When ever it kills person , his soul is captured in hell. Demon Lord collects souls as his personal army , and when numbers are enough to release them in mortal world . Demon Lord manipulates weilder of weapon , to kill more and more , granting wielder powerful spells , and physical power . The purer soul is killes its better , weapon can even capture soul of angel, with torture and time to turn him into dark angel . Wielder can willingly travel to hell to question souls , and if crazy and powerful enough to challenge Demon Lord to duel . Demon Lord if beaten by wielder dies , or is put in chains to serve wielder ,to serve new ruler of that private part of hell .

Cursed/Magic properties

Weapon is a tool of Demon Lord , he amplify one of the seven sins ( lust , pride , greed...etc) . Also he gives spells and abilities to the wielder, ( chosen by DM appropriate to the system ) so that PC is fooled by thinking its powerful artefakt , but with every spell cast wielder looses sanity . If weapon is wielded by good person , he slowely looses sanity (depending on how many sanity points wielder has, he gain`s more spells and abilities ) , and finaly gain`s disorder , so that Demon Lord can easily manipulate him . Evil person must just show obidience to Deamon (then he will gain full potencial of weapon ) , but even then Deamon will give him disorder with time . Weapon has bonus DMG agains good , and gives to the wielder bonus 5% exp for every single person killed , no mather good or evil . This weapon is meant for people in positions of authority to wield , beacose they can easily kill many people .



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Comments ( 7 )
Commenters gain extra XP from Author votes.

Ted
August 8, 2011, 12:52
0xp

First thing first. Organization and grammar. Your submission is difficult to read due to your formatting and grammar mistakes. I'd suggest breaking it up into smaller paragraphs, and carefully looking at how your sentences are composed.

PoisonAlchemist
August 8, 2011, 17:38
0xp

I concur with Infested Jerk. Print it out on a sheet of paper and read it aloud to yourself or better yet have a friend read it to you. 

This item does not seem cursed, typically a cursed item has some sort of detrimental effect on the wielder.

Is Damon Lord a person, or do you mean Deamon? 

Siren no Orakio
August 10, 2011, 7:00
0xp

Linguistic mechanics aside, I suggest clarifying powers of the blade, and their consequences and conditions of use.

Slaya
August 10, 2011, 11:30
0xp

i write this in "flight" when i have time, piece by piece . english is my second language , i think it will always be grammar mistakes ... 

Ted
August 10, 2011, 21:11
0xp
English is a very hard language. I'd suggest reading as much english writing as possible (strolen.com can help!)- it will help your own compositions.
EchoMirage
August 17, 2011, 10:47
0xp
Hey there
two comments:

a) do not write in flight. Bide time in your work to polish it.
b) numerous other authors have English as their second, third etc language. If you need help, get it from either someone on your side of the net, or from a Strolenite. Again, invest effort, it will show in the quality of the piece.
hylandpad
September 9, 2011, 20:00
0xp
We all work hard on our subs, many of us taking days or weeks to get them just right. I'm sure you can too! A little extra effort, maybe letting it sit for a day or two while you think it over, can really help.

Like Echo said, don't write in flight, it results in quick, rushed work, that really will only get a bad reception.

And there are plenty of people who can help you with your language translation, all you need do is ask.


Random Idea Seed View All Idea Seeds

Hooper McFin's Two Shot Portal

       By: dudeington

Now, this ol' ramblin fellow tends to walk his talk a bit too far down the train sometimes.. So I'll be brief in my recantin' of how it was my Tavern "came to bein'" on the multiverse as a weave of it's own spell.. And how I'm even alive to tell the story!

You see it's simple really, trust me.. that's my specialty, keepin it elementary. And you can trust this old Bard.

Anyway, this one night these wizards get a ramblin' on about the temporal exististance of space and time and how it could be manifested in a weave of super dimensional space. whereupon the folded space would give rise to an infinite number of entrances and exits to one or many spaces. Now, seein' how my talkin' sometimes get's locked into the way us folks used to talk back in the ol' west. These wizards didn't know I was a master of the word. and I had heard everything they said. They were also a bit over the wagon, while I was steerin' the show.

So that's how it came to pass, I struck a bargain with the wizards. They come to me in the morning and conjure up their idea into reality and I'd pledge them my life, my existance.. in essence my soul. but in a much nicer sense of the word. So they came by in the morning a half remembering our talks the prior evenin'. And I recanted their words verbatum, and that's how it came to be. The spell was complete that afternoon. My tavern would be the super dimensional cube that would exist in this weave of space and time, folks could come and go as they please, knowin in mind some of the rules and limitations set forth.

A few of 'em as follows.

No feller can be causin a ruckus inside any of my fine establishments, as always rule number one god damnit.

n' second the portal works kinda tricky. When ya outside ya cast the spell and lend your will to luck a bit and regardless the doors to the bar will appear, the windows a luminescent amber.. you can hear the chattee but ya can't see in. And the catch is the door might be locked, in which case you chalk it up to lady luck and go walk off and try again in an hour. Now most times the door pops right open and from the outside you always come in the front door, immediately greeted by myself or one of our many fine patrons of Hooper McFin's Ale & Steakhouse.

Now when ya cast the spell from inside the Tavern, another catch comes up. The back door is mainly a secret for the non-initiated staff and the regulars but for sake of the prose let's assume we all know there's a secret door in the back with a portal there. Now when you go on through this one, you got two scenario's you oughta be aware of. One is ya pop outside relative to the same spot you came out. The other is, you walk back on into this one or another of our many Hooper McFin's Ale & Steakhouse.

so it's a clever quantum railroad I got my tavern and my people's caught on. But, Hey the show's sure as always goin. ohhh' rutin tootin skidoodle -

** And that's it.. that's the only notes I found on the spell, apparently out there somewhere is a Tavern caught on the mighty ebb and flow of the multiverse. Well. at least I can put to rest my torment as to the condition now referred to as "Hooper McFin's Teleportation Paranoia".

Dr. Clarke T. Mulligan - Professional researcher of Time & Space.

Hooper McFin's Ale & Steakhouse

Ideas  ( System ) | June 21, 2015 | View | UpVote 4xp


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