Upon initial examination, this bow does appears to be much like other bows made of light colored wood, if a bit yellow with age. Once someone picks it up, though, they will quickly find that it is not wood at all. It's weight is slightly greater then that of a normal bow, and the surface has the cool, porous feel of the bone it was made from. If they pull back the string, an arrow will immediately knock itself. The arrows are rather standard, with wooden shafts, though the head is made from bone chips. Upon loosing the arrow, the string will spring back, clearly ringing with the sound of a harp.
There is a history to this bow, though it is not known by many. It was created by a bard who's name has been lost to time. He was working with a group of adventurers on a quest to rid a swamp of trolls. During the battle, a troll came too close so he was forced to use his bow to beat it back. Unfortunately, this cracked it beyond repair. He was able to cut and shape the bones of the troll (which was slain when Jarret came to his defence and hacked it's head off from behind) and strung his new bow with all he had available: The strings from his harp. Sigrin, the party mage, then used his considerable magical crafting power to enchant the bow.
Strength +1 (Makes the player slightly stronger while using the bow)
Regenerating (i.e. unlimited) arrows (They were just standard for mine, but they can be magical arrows.)
Intelligence -1 (The player will be slightly less quick witted while using the bow, and have a small amount more difficulty figuring out problems.)
Any of these properties can easily be altered or changed to suit your game. The only thing I would suggest is that you keep the properties and penalties in line with what a troll would have/give.
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? Responses (11)-11
-1 for stats and -1 for no backstory.This could have been so much better.
I am not going to vote yet on this.
I know what this item was made for so I know the reason why it was written this way. Fen, I am glad that you are placing your stuff here from your NWN (Never Winter Nights for the laymen) stories here. It is a great addition to the site for you to get your creative influences and ideas out for your gamers as wel las some of us to possibly become interested in seeing for ourselves firsthand on what some of this looks like in a game such as NWN.
However. To make it a worthy submission for the Strolen's Citadel standards, it must have a certain amount of information and detail to it to make us want to read it.
Backstory: To include history, myth, lore, conversations, anything about the item other than its description and use.
Description: This describes the item to the best of your ability. Include as many details about it as you can leaving nothing out. Remember, while you know what it looks like, we don't.
Properties: This is important to not use specific terms in game stats. No +1 to this, or +5% to that. This is a freeform and relatively setting free place, not all of us play the same games so it must be generic. If it gives a +1 bonus to hit, say it gives a slightly better chance to it while using it.
For instance. You said this bow was made my the bones of a troll and that a bard built it. Ok lets see where we could go with that. This is just somethign I threw together so bear with me. I had some ideas that I liked about it and may use them for myself if they are not used here.
Description: The bone bow is crafted from the pocked marked bone of a troll, the femure to be exact. The yellow and white bone having been scraped and polished to remove any after flesh from the previous owner. The strength of the bow is rather strong, considering it is dried bone and normally brittle. It has been known to parry the blow from an angered troll, possibly a relative to the bone's previous owner.
The bow is approximately 4' long while strung, making only taller than average characters able to use with ease. A tufft of ragged hair hangs from the top of the bow, a testimate to the bones owner and it's pride in it's long hair.
When the bow is used a delicate hum issues forth from the sting as if from a lute or harp. The bard who originally crafted the bone bow used a few of his own harp strings to put the finishing touches to make it work. The string is thin yet durable, able to be tested by the strongest of users without worrying the tention.
Properties: When used, the weilder of the bow feels stronger, able to pull the bow back that extra inch to gain a little more distance or punching power. This only transfers over to the use of the bow and when not used, they feel as they always do.
A special feature of the bow is that is requires no arrows, instead when the string is pulled back taunt, an arrow knocks itself. Each arrow that appears however, looks as if it was made of bone as well yet punching through metal armor as a normal arrow would.
A downside to using this bow however is it makes the weilder slower to think and act. They have a hard time concentrating on the simplests of tasks and difficult and complex tasks and equations frustrate them quickly.
Damn I actually like what I wrote after reading it. I needs some work but could be fleshed out into a wonderful submission I think.
Just for the record, I am never going to play NWN, just like the Captain isnt going to play Dungeons and Dragons. This post is too short and as Mourngrymn says it needs a better description, and backstory. It is too open ended and lacking in detail.
+.5 points for inspiring Mourn's posting
Mourn took my post. He did. But he does not have to give it back. Somebody else should be posting all of that by now.
In addition my selected advice for this post is much like your other ones, so here is the cut and paste.
The idea behind the item is a good one. It makes sense. It is however poorly executed. Punch up the description some, make the sections 'flow together' more, and change the into box (it is not about the item and detracts from the post greatly (put that text in italics at the bottom of the post if you have to keep it).
This also sounds like a 'classic enchantment', something that would be 'on the books' but not regularly made (kind of like a ring of spider climbing or boots of squeeky floors). You should write it up from that angle.
Well if it isn't used here I wil ldefinately use it and flesh it out as my own. I had a few more ideas to put to it and seems ot be a rather interesting item now that I have thought on it.
The rewrite is good, having addressed the question of lack of detail as well as giving powers in terms in addition to the stats. Good follow up.
Fenix, way to go. What Scras said!
i think that you shouldn't have put the stats in, but on the whole i like it.
Not bad, if a little inconsistent (The bard who made the item is forgotten, but two of his party members are known.)
As said by others (and from my own experinces), delete the stats completely and just leave the verbal descriptions of it's effects.
Voted higher than I normally would just to spite those who would vote low because of in-game stats.