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30 Gnomish Gifts (For Services Rendered)

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Gallons of Gaudy Gnome Gadgets, Great and Greasy Gears of all Gamuts! Goggles, Glue, and Generously Generated Guns! Get Going, Guys! Gnomish Gifts, ahoy!

 

1 - Gnomeish Multifunction Bow  (That's a link!)

A short bow, fit for a gnome, with three seperate strings. Pull them in the right orders and you can get some cool effects! But, it could fire seriously wrong in a crisis. The gnomes typically grant this weapon to their Badgerscout Graduates, but the passing adventurer may pick up one of the surplus occasionally.

2 - Clockwork Claw

An elaborate gauntlet originally designed to perfect the "Nails on a chalkboard" sound. Sound it's up for regifting and our adventurers are are the perfect people to pawn it off on. Now to make up some ridiculous quest... The claw has lots of moving parts, malfunctions easily, and often pinches finger flesh when worn. The benefit? A badass Clockwork Claw at the end of your arm! The spiked fingertips gently chug up and down with the whirring of the contraption.

3 - Gnomish Schnaaps

A little bottle of pepperminty alcohol. Perfect for a quick pick-me-up in the morning, or put me down in the evening, or just whenever you want to drink some Gnomish Schnaaps. It will leave you with sparkling fresh breath with only a hint of the booze smell. Also makes a wonderful industrial-strength machine-lubricant. Don't drink too much. Don't drink and drive. Don't drink and not operate heavy machinery (It makes it more fun).

4 - Quadruple Crossbow

A behemoth of a crossbow. It features four patented firing slots, with a funnel feed, and quadruple pressure trigger. For legal reasons, the manual states it requires three hands to use safely, but who reads those anyway? This barrage in a box was built on the Femperhagen Faucets Official Credo: "Quantity Over Quality, That's Right!" So you can be sure you'll be fire lots of ammunition all over the place with this one!

5 - Blastshielders

A pair of heavy goggles, a base shape of thick leather with metal covering everything. They have a light sensing crystal mounted between the eyes (where you can see it, to make sure it's still there) that closes the lens shutters when exposed to bright light- And then experiences a minor, harmless, explosion. It comes with four extra crystals, which you "probably won't not need."

6 - Do-It-Yourself Young Gnome's First Explosives Kit (Ages 6+)

So, they noticed you looking at the flashy exploding toys and this is their gift to you. A Gnomish Explosives Starter Set. In 23 simple steps you'll be on the fast track to blowing up anything you want, or make, or someone else makes. Gnomes say, "If neccesity is the mother of invention, then explosions are the mother of breakthroughs!" Black smoke and a burst of flame is always a good sign you're making progress, and this handy kit will ensure you have everything you need to start inventing "Like a Gnome."

7 - Genuine Gnomish Automaton Butler (The G-GAB)

This amazing creation utilizes every aspect of Gnomish Technology that is currently legal! From Steambotics all the way to Gnashtological Pyrotechnics, this thing has them all! It follows you around, right at your heels, and dispenses hot mocha beverages ON COMMAND (and sometimes not). It serves as a towel rack! And a portable cooking flame! IT DOES EVERYTHING! If the Gnomes bless you with one of these, you are truly a lucky man.

8 - Superior Arrows (Another Link!)

These bad boys are modifed from BlinklyTech's orginal design! They provide 20% more Back Burning, a 14% increase in explosion area, and they can be fired with a normal bow and a flame! Fire your arrows in style with your very own Gnomish Superior Arrows! Come get some!

9 - Complete Set of 1st Printing Printing Press Pamphlets

Now THESE are valuable! A veritable Gnomish treasure! A Complete Set of ALL 37 DIFFERENT PRINTING PRESS PAMPHLETS! Yes, these are 1st printings and very rare. Why rare? They're on paper! Paper doesn't last long around Gnomish inventions! Well, actually these aren;t that great. Rare, sure. But for the same reasons the Press Pamphlets are rare, the Printing Press wasn't a big hit with most Gnomes. They sold the schematics to some dwarves and chalked it up as the only Gnomish invention that has ever been a failure. Still, these are rare.

10 - A Clock, or two

Everyone knows the Gnomes love their clocks, those tempermental timepieces of gears and springs, balances and what-not. Only a Gnome could keep one working and accurate. However, more-so than other Gnomish projects, they are viewed artistically. A proud Gnomish Clocksmith puts weeks or months into the design and construction of his clocks. Every bit of brass, cut of wood, or ornamental doohickey has a story and is meant to express something. Some Gnomes would claim Clocksmithing to be the purest form of expression, an absolute window to the artists mind. They give these gifts rarely, only to those who have had a personal impact. Saving a Gnome's loved one is a pretty good way to get a clock.

11 - Tools of the Trade

A worker's tools are important, no matter what his job is. The tools of the trade could be an elaborate set of mechanic's gear or just a belt full of hammers and nails. The tools are important, this is true, but it's what you do with what you have that sets you apart from the rest. Gnomes encourage creativity and exploring alternate problem solving methods, as such it is a common occurence for a Gnome or Gnome-friend to recieve tools not specifically suited to the task at hand. If a Gnome tells you to patch up a roof but hands you a spice rack, or sends you to fix some plumbing with a blowtorch, do not scorn his gift or think he is mad. He is trying to help you... By being unhelpful. Teaching you to make do with what you have. 

12 - Gnomish Party Favors

Dangerous, dangerous things. Even a Gnome regard a party favor with suspicion. When that Delayed Combustion Silly String comes out... or the Thunderpoppers...  Shocking Streamers... Gnomes take these things very seriously. No... No! Not the Party Hat! ...

13 - Industrial Strength Notebook

Several sheets of metal bound with a metal ring at the corners. Includes a solid steel pencil for etching your notes in a durable fashion. As mentions previously, Gnomes have a hard time with paper. This is the most logical alternative ever imagined by a Gnome.



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Random Idea Seed View All Idea Seeds

       By: Siren no Orakio

What if some crazy wizard created an artifact that empowered rodents that touched it with one random supernatural power? Preferly right out of the pages of your favorite four-color. (But only one power!) This item does not convey any sort of intelligence boost.

Ideas  ( Items ) | April 15, 2004 | View | UpVote 1xp


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