"First, he pointed that giant metal rod at me and out came a glass vial, it exploded next to me! Next thing you know, out comes a friggin’ bear! Then, as if that wasn’t bad enough, he sticks it in the ground. It expands and he walks into it to get a snack!" - Xzud, Experimental Arms Dealer.
The lengthy process to do something necessary or a magical scroll needed is inscribed on the other side of a great tapestry and can't be removed. For more fun it could be in the kings throne room. Try to hide in shadows with a 20*5 (yards/meters) monstrosity!