You Have Two Cows

1-Mugabeism

You have two cows. You are a member of a minority living in a colony. When the colony becomes independent, the new ruler says that you stole the land and takes it and the cows away from you. He gives one cow to people who have no idea how to look after it, and it starves to death. He gives the other cow to his cronies who sell it to a slaughterhouse for money.

2-Yocastaism

You have two cows. Unfortunately the Queen sees them and thinks they look just like her two cows who died recently, so the royal guards take them away and try and train them to be just like her cows. One fails the training and gets slaughtered and eaten and the other ends up in the private royal paddock being treated like a member of royalty.

3-Dungeonism

You have two cows. Unfortunately they go into a cave whilst out on the free range where a baby dungeon core has just come to life. ( See What is a Dungeon Core for details. The dungeon in the long term ends up producing hell cattle, buffalo and Minotaurs as monsters, but you have just lost your cows.

4-City State Democracy 

You have two cows and you live in a small democratic city state. Your neighbours vote on who gets the milk from your two cows and it’s rarely you, as you only have one vote out of about 10,000 or so.

5-Countrywide Democracy 

You have two cows and you live in a large democratic country which votes for a member of Parliament or a Senator- and he or she decides who gets the milk from your two cows . And as you only have one vote in a country of millions of people it is very unlikely to be you.

6-Feudalism 

You have two cows. The lord takes half the milk, but at least you get to keep the other half of the milk for yourself.

7-Maoism

You have two cows. The government calls you a kulak and sends you to a reeducation camp to be tortured, whilst your cows are looked after by people who used to be university professors until they were denounced and rusticated to the countryside.