Items
Armor
Magical
1.5
2 Votes

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Hits: 115
Comments: 10
Ideas: 0
Rating: 1.5
Condition: Requires Edit
ID: 2656

Submitted:

Updated:
May 28, 2006, 8:23 am

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Axe Of The Slayer

By:

wielded by the mighty Boran Catharsonen himself;legendary runesmith of karan Gale. But sadly was lost in the great wars.

Full Item Description
An axe of expertly crafted dwarfsteel covered with runes of breaking and destroying.
This item was forged by Boron Catharsonen deep in the forges of Karan Gale.

History
this legendary weapon was wielded and also forged by Boron Catharsonen himself; legendary dwarf runesmith of karan gale the ancient dwarf city deep within the Ironhold mountains in the best forges that the world can offer, manned by only the best dwarf runesmiths and engineers.
Boron Catharsonen was famous for his skill at runesmithing weapons of great quality and power, this axe is undoubtedly his best work ever.
(for more information on the ironhold mountains keep checking the locations page it will appear there soon (( it will probably take me a long time to perfect it))).
The great wars where the wars were only a small number of dwarfs including Boron Catharsonen. They managed to hold out a long time against the invaders but where eventually overwhelmed by sheer weight of numbers.
Magic/Cursed Properties
this axe can cut through any armour and will start glowing when evil is near or when it senses evil spells or any other thing tainted by evil.



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Comments ( 10 )
Commenters gain extra XP from Author votes.

Voted Scrasamax
May 22, 2006, 8:09
0xp
Looks like a lot was forgotten. As in the previous sub...

Who was Boran Catharsonen? Why was he legendary? Was he a dwarf?

Where is Karan Gale? Does it have alot of forges? Is it a dwarven city, a monastary of dwarven axe-makers?

Who fought in the Great Wars? why were they great wars?
Scrasamax
May 23, 2006, 10:45
0xp
I am glad to see that you have made some improvements on this submission Freddie!
Voted Alec_Shadowkin
May 22, 2006, 8:24
0xp
I agree with Scras. There's not really anything here other than the basic description, which is threadbare and ambiguous. Try adding (a lot of) detail.
chilled
May 23, 2006, 8:01
0xp
a very good piece of equipment i think.
5/5
MoonHunter
May 24, 2006, 13:43
0xp
Chilled, you have set your standards fairly low. While this is an improvement over other posts, this is still quite lacking in a couple of areas.

Freddie, do a couple of things for me before you post again.

Review!
Review the top rated posts of the category you want to post it. If you want to do an item, click into items, then the highest rated (in red) and it will give you a list of the best items. Read the first ten or so.

Ask yourself, is your post anything like any of those?

Put some effort into it
This is your major failing point in my opinion. You need to focus on this. Put some thought into your post. Take your time putting the post into print. Taking time to do a post right shows you care not only about your audience and yourself, but you care about the thing you are posting about. If you aren't spending a minimum of 15 to 30 minutes on the post, it will probably be abused and low rated, like this one. Most of us spend 45 to 60 minutes on a post. Some of us considerably more. Remember, you will spend more time actually thinking about your post before you put it up, if you want to do it right.

Work at the post until it is "complete"; it answers all the questions a gamer might have about it.

Lastly, SPELL CHECK and GRAMMAR CHECK IT!
I really mean it. Go through your posts. Make sure it follows the basic rules of grammar. Sentences start with capital letters, end with punctuation, and have everything moderately correct in between. Extra lines should be inserted between paragraphs (and there should be paragraphs). I can not stress the next part more that simply scream, "Spell check!". If you can, copy (from web site) and paste (into word processor) your post into a WP with spell check. Run the spell check (and the grammar check if it has it). Copy and paste it back. If you do this, it will automatically improve your post by one point (on average). If we can simply and easily read your post, we can start critiquing it rather than your awful spelling.

To repeat my previous comments on your posts, if English is not your primary language (and it seems like it is), let us know. However, be warned that many of our best posters have English as a second, third, or even fourth language. So all we ask is that you continue to work at it, to get it right. http://www.strolen.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=1559
chilled
May 25, 2006, 8:01
0xp
ok i just thought it was good that was all.
i cuold see that it needed a bit of improvement but i just wanted to encourage him to try and make him better it as bit more.


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