Strolen\s Citadel content. 
Lifeforms  (Intelligent Species)   (City/ Ruin)
Drackler's comment on 2010-07-30 11:26 PM
I love it! These things are just threatening enough to pose an actual threat, without just being another baddie to send the part against. The idea for encounters could play through a whole range, and each could be different. Good job, Bly!

Also, I think that the Niyott should find The Ink Drinkers. Go to Comment
The Crystal Scholar
NPCs  (Minor)   (Knowledge/Lore)
Drackler's comment on 2010-07-30 11:19 PM
A good application of the Quasi-souls. Also an interesting goal for the party when they need some information. I would love to see what tidbits my party brings out to barter for what they need. Go to Comment
Lifeforms  (Intelligent Species)   (Any)
Drackler's comment on 2010-07-30 11:15 PM
They seem a very interesting group of creatures. I would like to see more information on those Quasi-souls trying to purge their souls.
A couple of things stand out to me as being odd. First, the Quasi-souls prefer tact over overt combat when at odds with someone. Why? I don't know, but it just seems at odds with how I picture them. Of course, you would know better than I about this, it just confuses me.
Secondly, the Quasi-souls prefer to blend in to the background and stay hidden. Not only does this seem difficult judging by their form, but it also seems impractical. You said that Quasi-souls seeking to become Soulesses do horrible acts to get them nearer to their goal. Wouldn't the opposite also be true, that Quasi-souls seeking to become Soulfuls would try to do good deeds so as to get them to their own goal?

Also, a small note on typography: There are a few points where the plurality changes in the middle of a sentence. it isn't necessarily a problem, I just find it distracting.

And, at the tail-end of this criticism, I'll add that I do really like this sub, and I hope to see plenty more. Go to Comment
Mug of Blood
Items  (Home/ Personal)   (Magical)
Drackler's comment on 2010-07-28 10:11 AM
I like it. I could see this being given to some red-herring NPC by mistake, and then the party would start thinking that he was some evil necromancer/demon/lawyer that drinks the blood of the living for breakfast. Go to Comment
Coat of the Endless Fare
Items  (Clothes)   (Magical)
Drackler's comment on 2010-07-25 11:13 PM
While interesting, this item has very, very limited use. Unless you party needs to get from one end of town to the other a number of times. Though I still do like the item. Go to Comment
Lifeforms  (Unique)   (Any)
Drackler's comment on 2010-07-23 06:20 PM
Perhaps an entire town of Xarloccians that have killed off the normal townsfolk would need to go out and find people to kill, etc. Or would they be able to be generally nasty to each other every day just to keep from rotting? That could lead to an interesting town in which the heroes find an entire village of surly townsfolk that delight in tormenting them. Not in big ways, just pranks and disrespect. Go to Comment
Choo Mold
Lifeforms  (Flora)   (Underground)
Drackler's comment on 2010-07-23 06:51 PM
A nice bit to add to a dungeon crawl. I agree with Strolen: I like the Treant idea very much. Go to Comment
Eustacius: the demiplane of twisted dreams
Dungeons  (Other)   (Rooms/ Halls)
Drackler's comment on 2010-07-24 06:48 PM
I agree with Pieh. I really like how it's all pretty much a big puzzle, but with some combat and such thrown in to keep it interesting. I like the plot ideas and the map would be handy when running it. Go to Comment
Ride My See-Saw
Plots  (Crisis)   (Single-Storyline)
Drackler's comment on 2010-07-25 10:46 PM
I especially like the format; it is easily understood and organizes things rather well. Go to Comment
Legend of a Mind
Plots  (Hired)   (Single-Storyline)
Drackler's comment on 2010-07-25 10:53 PM
Only voted Go to Comment
Lifeforms  (Third Kingdom)   (Underground)
Drackler's comment on 2010-07-28 11:01 PM
I really like these. The image of a great worm-like creature made up of stone slithering toward a castle wall and plowing right through makes me want to write an adventure based on the one creature.
I also like the idea that not all the elementals are summoned by mages (as it is in DnD, mostly), but rather, that they are natural creatures with specific abilities and properties.
Good job, Scras! Go to Comment
Lifeforms  (Fauna)   (Forest/ Jungle)
Drackler's comment on 2010-07-28 11:12 PM
I will agree with what the others have said before me. I am especially intrigued by the rumors of the Mordanfey protecting something in the forest. Go to Comment
The Riot Dog
NPCs  (Scenario Based)   (Political)
Drackler's comment on 2010-05-09 02:45 PM
I like the note at the bottom. With the three uses in your campaign, this one almost seems like something from Tales of Terror. Altogether, it sounds useful and interesting. I could see using it as a way to get the characters into an adventure, or even becoming the adventure itself. Go to Comment
Everbloom Potion
Items  (Potion)   (Magical)
Drackler's comment on 2010-05-09 02:50 PM
Like val said: solid, but more of a side in an adventure. It can add good flavour to the world, and can help explain things, but making it the center of an adventure would take some thinking. Go to Comment
30 Limitations on Magic
Systems  (Mystical)   (Defining)
Drackler's comment on 2010-05-09 03:15 PM
I pretty much agree with what everyone else said. I especially like the bit about using lead-lined boots to keep yourself on the ground. Go to Comment
The Pierce of the Sun God
Items  (Melee Weapons)   (Magical)
Drackler's comment on 2010-01-25 06:51 PM
I especially liked the intro and the backstory, but, unfortunately, you didn't give enough details. You gave us the bare minimum to be able to use the Pierces in our games, but we usually like a little bit more to work with.
For instance, who was it that "recovered" the star-metal in the first place? How did Gavin Ferrig get his hands on it? Did he just buy it off the street? Was it given to him because of his skill as a smith?
You might also think about giving us one or two plot hooks, some ideas as to exactly how we could fit the Pierces into our games.
I still like it, though. And Welcome to the Citadel, kleric! Go to Comment
The Last Zombie
Plots  (Duty)   (Single-Storyline)
Drackler's comment on 2010-01-23 11:27 AM
I mainly agree with VIM, but I would like to also say that I found your writing to flow smoothly and be interesting, while still getting all the information across. Go to Comment
Lockzennite's Lance
Items  (Melee Weapons)   (Combat)
Drackler's comment on 2010-01-22 04:28 PM
I also like the key imagry. I also agree that it is very unique. Altough, the times that it would be of good use would be fairly limited. Go to Comment
Jade Alksnis
NPCs  (Scenario Based)   (Criminal/Espionage)
Drackler's comment on 2010-01-21 01:27 PM
The backstory was very well written and detailed. It was very reminiscent of the European arrivals in the Americas. But, for a submission about an NPC, you gave us very little to go on about her.
There is some information in the history, but nothing about what Jade looks like, or how she might treat a party of adventurers, or even what she does during the day. Even the single plot hook seems almost tacked on as an after thought.
You have a good, solid foundation with which you could make almost anything, but you didn't make much that could easily be used, except as a bit of background information. Go to Comment
Lifeforms  (Constructed)   (Any)
Drackler's comment on 2010-01-21 01:10 PM
It reminds me a little of RuneQuest, what with the 'disease spirits' that cause plagues. The details are good, as is the description.
Even though it is set in a age when there are firearms, they don't play that big of a role, so it could be adapted very easily.
I especially like how the Harakan are addicted as well as bound by the blood that they drink. Go to Comment
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       By: Strolen

A people who believe it is incredibly impolite to speak to anybody they meet for the first time. They believe their actions should speak for them until they are comfortable in each others presence and can then trust each other. Only then would converstation be appropriate.

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