Strolen\s Citadel content. 
Society/ Organization
Criminal/Espionage
World Wide

1.3

5 Votes

-10xp

ID:4879
Hits:1998
Comments: 12
Ideas: 0
Rating:1.3
Condition: Normal

Submitted:
August 24, 2010, 2:22 pm
Updated:
August 24, 2010, 2:22 pm





Spies of Lindor
By: Eskilsohn

The Spies of Lindor is a large connection of people, who could show up at your doorstep, store, or right behind you at this very moment…

The Spies of Lindor were created in the province of Lindor approximately 200 years ago by a man named Kros Embron. It’s sole purpose was to gain information about a Resistance force against the kingdom brewing at the time. The Spies were victorious in a cover-up and complete destruction of this force, but then Kros was assassinated by his second in command and the group was split into two sections, which both remain today. The Espers of Lotrii (A city in Lindor) were created by the previous second-in-command and came to be near just as powerful as the Spies.

They have a very ‘hush-hush’ war, in which most people are killed in their sleep. They have become two very different societies and strategies. They fight all over the province of Lindor, and have yet to end the war there.

The Spies of Lindor have branched out, with their Headquarter’s remaining in Lindor. You never know if a Lindor may be recruiting, or causing harm, to your community or town. Watch out, for they may be near…



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Comments ( 12 )
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Drackler

2008-03-06 10:25 PM
Link: [4879#64107|text]
1xp
A little short, it would be nice if you fleshed out the backstory a little more, also, it would be extremely interesting if you could describe the two factions in more detail.
Murometz

2008-03-06 10:36 PM
Link: [4879#64110|text]
0xp
Potentially awesome, but we could use a little more context, plus what Drackler said :)
Voted CaptainPenguin

2008-03-07 03:53 AM
Link: [4879#64112|text]
0xp
What was the reason for this resistance movement? Who was Kros Embron and why did he create the Spies? How do the Espers differ from the Spies? What are the group's rituals and practices?
This has definite potential, but it needs work.
Misanpilgrim

2008-03-07 03:22 PM
Link: [4879#64114|text]
0xp
Why are the Spies and the Espers killing each other? Do their different strategies obstruct each other, and does each side blame the other because this "obstruction" is allowing the remnants of the Resistance to rebuild?
Cheka Man

2008-03-07 09:13 PM
Link: [4879#64122|text]
0xp
Lindor makes me think of the chocolate company. lol. I will hold my vote for now.
valadaar

2008-03-10 08:54 AM
Link: [4879#64176|text]
0xp
There is some potential here, but as Cheka pointed out, the name Lindor just makes me hungry.
Nafar
2010-07-23 04:09 PM
Only voted
Voted Cheka Man
2010-07-27 11:30 AM
Only voted
Pieh

2010-07-31 09:56 PM
Link: [4879#74240|text]
0xp
I'm not sure why this one was challenged. It is a great ground piece to launch your own spy-battle campaign from. You would need to fill in the blanks mentioned in previous comments and after that I think it would be usable. Sure, names would need to change, but I really see no good reason for challenging this one.
Voted valadaar

2010-08-24 02:22 PM
Link: [4879#74385|text]
0xp
I agree with Pieh on the challenge status. However, it needs a lot of work to earn a higher vote.
Voted Mourngrymn

2010-08-24 09:36 PM
Link: [4879#74389|text]
0xp
This seems more like an idea sub than an actual full submission. Things that I would like to see added in there.
1) Who was Kros Embron? Was he a King? An advisor to a King? A powerful merchant or simply a well connected and respected miscreant?
2) What was the resistance and how did it come about? What was the need to have someone look into it and destroy it later?
3) Where did the Spies of Lindor gain their training to become so adept at what they needed to do in such a short time?
4) If they were formed as information gatherers why does it seem that they became full fledged assassins in such short order?
5) Why was Kros killed by his second in command and why did the faction split into two, why not just stay under the command of Kros's killer?
6) Why the creation of the Espers of Lotrii? And where did their training in the assassin arts come from?

Not saying that this is a horrible sub by any means. It has a lot of potential I'm thinking but it definitely needs to be fleshed out more.
Voted Nafar
2010-09-27 08:22 AM
Only voted

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