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Items
Melee Weapons
Cursed
1.8
10 Votes

-5xp


Hits: 4381
Comments: 7
Ideas: 0
Rating: 1.8
Condition: Normal
ID: 450

Submitted:

Updated:
March 14, 2007, 1:23 pm

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Claw of the heart

By:

An dagger made by setting a long sharp gem in a silver hilt. Its owners rarely survive for a few days…

The sun was setting and Hensaz loaded the wood into his cart. He finaly finished and let out a long sigh. It was dark now and it was a long walk home. He started pushing the cart full of wood down the road. After five miles the road turned and went passed the grave yard. The crypts cast eire shadows along the road. Sudenly something gave him the urge to go into the grave yard. He wandered deeper and deeper into it and sudenly triped over a tree root. In the grass was a long red shard of crystal it pulsed with a dim light. He picked it up looking it over. It pulsed faster and thoughts crept into his mind. They all wanted it all of them. Morning came and a small party of the town guard came to look for him. In the graveyard they found an old man gibbering and clutching the shard. When they tried to talk to him he stabed one with the shard. They killed the man but the body wasn’t of a old man it was of Hensaz…

Magical Properties:

The gem is evil it uses its powers of illusions to make its owners go insane and makes them seem like gibbering old men. If in contact with the dagger for more than an hour it shows illusions of people stealing it from you or trying to kill you. It can cast sympathy on its self when it finds a owner it likes once affected the owner will become obbsesed with the dagger and kill anyone who says anything to them. Otherwise it is a normal dagger.



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Comments ( 7 )
Commenters gain extra XP from Author votes.

CaptainPenguin
April 12, 2004, 20:43
0xp
Like the name.

Anyway...
Punctuation. Spelling. 'Nuff said.
The ability is rather cliche. A dagger that makes you covet it an be paranoid. Wow. How original.
Why would such an item come into being? Who created it? What is the point of it's curse?

3/5.
Pirate Penguin
April 12, 2004, 20:47
0xp
Pirate Penguin sez...


Repeat after me Pirate Penguin.

"If I don't have something constructive to say, I will NEVER EVER post."

Say it till it sinks in.


.... yours,
Pirate Penguin.
Agar
April 13, 2004, 11:35
0xp
Agar sez ...

Pirate Penguin, if you don't have anything to say about WHY you did or didn't like the post, DON'T comment! Post WHAT you didn't like about the item, so that we can all see the issues you have. Just saying it wasn't good doesn't help anything.

I am in agreement with Capt, puctuation-wise, I didn't see the spelling problem, but whatever.

I would like to know a few things. First off, what is this "sympathy" spell it can cast on itself, I've never heard of it. Also, how did it become cursed? Was it once good and became tainted, or was it made to be cursed?

3/5
Strolen
April 13, 2004, 19:00
0xp
Why? That is my main question, as the others saw as well...although this thing is way too powerful to be useful anyway. What is the fun of it if it works so fast with no hope? Everything is too extreme and overbearing leaving no room to actually use it or attempt to cure the curse.

But back to why. These things make no sense to me because I see no reason for it. Was there a jealous magician that wanted to ruin a rival? Backfire of another weapon? With no reason and no history it makes no sense. 2/5 because it has some potential but unuseable in its current state.
Ylorea
June 16, 2004, 6:24
0xp
I can imagine many history's or reasons for the existance of this object.

No hope..... Well, I would have a difficult time to explain to someone else how to "save" if I do not want to fall into system terminologie.

All in all however, I miss all the details and have to make all the story up. I go like Strolen (2/5)
Voted Zylithan
December 3, 2005, 0:32
0xp
The title is good, and I like the story-telling style you used to start the piece. It seems like you rushed to finish it however, and didnt give as complete a picture as you could have.
Voted Moonlake
June 22, 2013, 1:58
0xp
Aside from editorial issues, the story of Hensaz wasn't badly written although on the actual item, it's really just sth that will get whoever acquires it killed in prob. no time unless it's picked up by a hermit living in a place with nobody else. I will go with a vote of 2 as well since as it is, I think it could be some random story told by an odd old man who goes around villages telling stories or sth (like Belgara in the Belgariad by David Eddings)

Freetext



Random Idea Seed View All Idea Seeds

       By: ephemeralstability

THE GNOMES OF UDNALOR: Part II

Having left the hush of the upper halls, and crossed the depths of the Braeth (an underground river, which is not all that deep because bear in mind we're talking about gnomes here), you would find yourself in Wattling Street, the main road through Udnalor. It's actually a long, well-worn passageway which opens out eventually into the City Centre. The gnome-buildings branch off Wattling Street as small burrows or caverns with boulder-blocked doorways for privacy. You can find armourers and smiths (though their armour tends to be on the small side for humans to buy) and many other types of trader.

There are many streets, ginnels and cooies which run off Wattling Street, the most famous probably being Smell Street, the domain of the infamous gnomish alchemists, the eponymous smell being very distinctive: the stench of cooking fungus, the aroma of subterranean spices, the pungent reek of rotting carcasses (used in some of the more notorious experiments). An encounter with an alchemist can really be spiced up (excuse the pun) if you have a well-stocked herb cupboard, and actually make up the potions, elixirs and draughts as they are ordered by characters.

Ideas  ( Locations ) | May 4, 2002 | View | UpVote 0xp


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