The School of Scholars presents: The Orcish Creation Myth

[CaptainPenguin]

The School of Scholars has labored day and night to translate from Orcish the monument to idiocy and violence that is the Orcish Creation Myth. For the sake of our readers' intelligence, we have "smartened it up" for them. Enjoy.

In the beginning, there was the Big Noise and the Big Night. The Big Noise screamed at the Big Night, and the Big Night cried like a human and ran away, and when Big Night ran away, Urg was there, and had giant yellow tusks and black skin. And Big Noise screamed at Urg, and Urg hit Big Noise with his big axe, Bagra. And Big Noise's blood made Bagra turn into Gundu. Urg and Gundu had many children who were green because Gundu was a weak mate. When Urg saw that his children were green, he yelled at Gundu and hit her with his big fists and killed her, and then he taught his children to be strong. Then, Urg called them Orcs and told them that the puny, ugly weak-elves and the puny, ugly weak-humans were stupid and needed to be hit. So the Orcs became strong warriors and went to serve Urg with their axes.

OOC: Hey, all, this is a very bad version of the Orcish Creation. If anyone else wants to give their Orcish creation myth, post it here.

[zaptara]

'' orcs were elves once'' ''really'' ''yes elves tortured and deformed there lives shortened to them life span of a humans'' '' elves who would of guessed'' '' yes elves stop interupting, elves as you know were the oposite of orcs, maybe thats why they hated us from the start or maybe just the fact that they werew us once''

ooc sorta copied from lord of the rings

[ephemeralstability]

I. The Orcs were born in the twilight beneath the Earth in Munsag's prison. Incarcerated for his affair with Mulak, wife of Thurhaz, Munsag built an army of clay men in his gaol and set them to work tunnelling their way out. They were dumb and blind, knowing only to dig with their powerful biceps. II. When they reached the air of Earth it stung their lungs and made them ill. But Munsag cared not for his ugly creations. He had escaped. He sought revenge on Thurhaz. Disguised as a young servant he reached Thurhaz's chamber and hacked off his head. III. Left to fend for themselves, Munsag's clay men hid back beneath the ground in the damp caverns, feeling only hatred and resentment, wishing they could see, longing for the ability to speak. IV. The brother of Thurhaz, Logri saw the Orcs and realised how their hatred of Munsag could be exploited. He visited their caverns and promised them sight and speech if only they would assist him to depose Munsag who had seized the throne. V. The Orcs accepted and sallied forth, now with a poor sense of sight and the ability to communicate in grunts. They took Munsag by surprise, who was shocked to see his own hideous legion turn against him. VI. Expecting gratitude from Logri, the Orcs now found only repugnant gazes. Eventually Logri, who was so disgusted with the race he had exploited, sent his elvish armies to drive them back underground. VII. Now the Orcs live in the filth beneath ground from which they were created. They can speak a little, but neither write nor read. They know only hatred, cruelty and power.

[CaptainPenguin]

I kinda' like Eph's myth better than mine.

[ephemeralstability]

Really? I thought yours was more in keeping with Orcish ways...

The Inuits had many words for snow. The Orcs have one word for Big and they like to use it a lot.

[CaptainPenguin]

As you turn the page of the leather-bound document to the third Orcish creation myth, you notice a hand-written note at the top of the page: "Note that many Orcish myths contain the idea of 'Big Night'. Perhaps a reference to living in caves?"

Thunder Axe Clan Orcs Creation Myth:

In the first time, their was only two things: Big Night and Urku. Big Night was big and black and had no stars or sun, just empty air. Urku was big and strong and had big biceps. But Urku doesn't look like you or me, or even an elf or a human. Urku has a beak like a bird and eyes like a troll-cat, claws like a dragon and scales like a lizard, feet like a bird, and  a long tail, like we Orcs used to have. In the first time, when Urku was in Big Night's stomach, Urku was bored and restless, because he couldn't see. So, to pass the time, Urku started to do a Storm Dance to bring lightning and thunder so that he could chase it around. Urku is quicker than the lightning. But with each step, Urku threw up some dirt from the First Ground that was in Big Night's belly, and with each shout Urku made, some spittle flew from his mouth and mixed with the dirt and made mud. Urku slipped in the mud and became angry. He started to pound the mud with his strong arms and kick the mud with his bird feet. A spirit came out of the mud and said "Oh mighty Urku, stop wrecking my ground. My family cannot sleep!" But Urku would not be stopped. He said "I'll make them sleep!" and dug down into the mud with his big, powerful arms and broke the necks of the spirit and his family. Then, Urku saw a light in Big Night and ran off to find it. While Urku was gone, the dead spirits in the mud became little weak things with teeth that ate the mud and cowered from Big Night. But soon, Urku came back, and when he saw what pitiful things the little weaklings were, he resolved to make them big and strong. Urku climbed up the side of Big Night's belly until he came to Big Night's mouth, where he yelled out in Big Night's voice to the sky demons who hold the sun in a box. The sky demons were curious and came with their box to see who had yelled. When they came, Urku chopped off their heads with his axe, and water came out instead of blood. Now, when the sky demons fly about, water falls from their wounds and onto the ground. That is why we have rain. Urku took the box from the sky demons and he took it below, into Big Night's belly. When the little things saw Urku return, they gathered around his feet, and he tripped, breaking the box and letting the sun free. The sky demons flew after it to catch it and put it into a box again. That is why the sun moves across the sky, and when it becomes red, that is when the sky demons have bloodied it with their claws. Urku then took the little things and carried them out of Big Night's belly and set them in the ground where they became big and strong from reaching out and feasting on passing weak-men and weak-elves. When Urku was satisfied that they were strong enough, he took the things, which were now big and strong, with big biceps like him, and taught them how to make stones into axes and how to use them. Then, Urku called his children the Orcs and they were 100 sons and 100 daughters. Urku said that this was good and told the Orcs that he was leaving and that while he was gone, he wanted them to be strong and make themselves dominant. Then, Urku walked away into the Big Winter, where it is too cold for Orcs, but just right for Urku.

[Shadoweagle]

Lets see... Ok. How about this: Orcs were created not by a god, but by the very earth itself. The orcs are a symbol of the earths health. Once they were the most beautiful race, Their movement fluid like water, features as naturally compelling as the lush green grass, and eyes as mysterious as the deepest, untouched forests. But as humankind corrupted the lands, using earths resources and leaving wastelands when they razed all they could, the orcs changed in shape. Smooth, soft skin roughened like the toughness of the dried earth that the humans left. Their minds and bodies now moving like the fire that man pushed all throughout the lands. Their eyes are now angrier than the oceans swelling in a hurricane. Orcs are the guardians, so to speak, of the earth. The reason they always seem to ally themselves AGAINST the humans, is because the orcs see the humans as evil. Funny how humans see orcs as the same thing. Humans hate the orcs, thinking they are a blemish on the earth, but ironically, it is the HUMANS that are the blemish!

For every human, the view on orcs are that they are barbaric, non-sophisticated and primitive. In truth, they were the first race ever to grace the earth. They were wrought out of the very elements that the earth made. If ever an orc chose to talk to a human instead of slay him (which is very rare, and based on the compassion for the earth that the human may feel), that human will be awed with the beauty of days past that the orc speaks to him about. Days when the earth was simple, and all was filled with beauty. Days when the orcs themselves were the most beautiful creations, full of wisdom and mystery. The orcs are 'primitive', because they know that technology will only destroy the mother land which they love so much.

Though they have the genitalia, Orcs do not procreate with one another. They do not produce young orcs. But orcish shamans are able to extract elements from the natural earth and create new orcs using the same method the earth did to create the originals. There are still many originals around, and they are usually the chieftans, leaders, shamans and lords of the orc society. Not because they are more powerful, but because they have seen more of life and are wise.

Now, imagine if, in some untouched part of the world, there is a group of orcs who had managed to detatch themselves from the change of the planet by magical means. In ancient times, in the middle of a dense, untravelled forest, some adventurers may find a small community. In this community is a group of some 50 humanoid people, more beautiful than man had ever set eye on before. These people always have a small smile on the edge of their lips, as though they know something that nobody else is ever supposed to know. They are full of mystery and intrigue. So beautiful is everything about them, that the adventurers may want to stay there. And perhaps some do. Perhaps these orcs seduce some of these adventurers. And perhaps from there, is born the elves and the dwarves. Either way, these untouched orcs can divulge secrets known only to the earth herself, should they wish to. They are mysterious people, known to do things for unknown causes. So for one person, they might share half the secrets of the world. For another person, they might tell nothing.
This 'sanctuary', if nothing else, is a good place to get information for a quest.