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Author Topic: The Call of Captain-thulhu  (Read 294402 times)

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Online Strolen

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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2950 on: November 15, 2014, 05:30:19 PM »
This one time I was going to

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Offline Pariah

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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2951 on: November 16, 2014, 04:18:28 AM »
...unfortunately you were unable.  It happens sometimes and I, for one, don't look down on you for it.  The light fixtures on the other hand, they look down upon us all, and they smile in their bloodless way, and they wait until the time is right.
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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2952 on: November 22, 2014, 06:48:21 AM »
A field of fleshy daffodils hungers
The silvery sheen of oil stares
The putrid reek of gasoline tastes
The chill whispers of the storm caress
For the love of meat, shut up! No one wants to hear your emo character background! My hands are literally melting away, and I'm complaining less than you!
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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2953 on: November 22, 2014, 11:45:04 PM »
Arterial blood's red, // Roses are red,  //  The walrus is dead,
Venous is blue. // Violets are blue.  //  it's lovers die too.
I'm still alive, // Dread Cthulhu lies dreaming, // I'll get you my pretty,
And I see you.   //  And Nyarlethotep watches you. // And your little dog, too.
For the love of meat, shut up! No one wants to hear your emo character background! My hands are literally melting away, and I'm complaining less than you!
—K'seliss, Goblins

Offline Pariah

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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2954 on: November 24, 2014, 01:21:04 PM »
Alright, it is time you mofos.  I am straight going to talk about this nonsensical language shtuff that lazy writers use to make their characters names/lingos sound "foreign" to a non-Inglish ear.  Because this is aimed primarily at native speakers of teh English (whether it be the Queen's or that collection of dialects known primarily as 'Murican) you foreign folks prolly only need to skim it, cause really, all you need to do to make something sound foreign to us rulers of the world (I don't want to hear anything from you Brits, we basically took over the whole primary world power thing from you, so I know that in you time you would've been slightly put out if anyone worth talking to didn't speak English) is use your native tongue.

Sin the First: Apostrophes.  I mean, really, slapping an apostrophe in the middle of a word isn't just stupid, it's lazy.  Unless if you're writing a Sco'ish character, there's really no reason to be using glottal stops just to sound special.  Exceptions include: Scots, 'Arabs (yes, the "proper" transliteration of Arab would include an apostrophe seeing as the 'ayin is generally written with an apostrophe when transcribed into English because there's really no other way to write "I'm currently choking on a cock"); if your conlang actually has glottal stops or a voiced pharyngeal fricative (in the later case might I recommend ʕ as an approximation due to its use in IPA? No? I didn't think so... :c) feel free to use the apostrophe.  Everyone else, can make ʕ noises around the gratuitous I will shove down your hatch.

Sin the Second: C/Ck/K diskishness.  Where the First just reeks of laziness, the second is that of pretentiousness.  Yes, there are real religions that think that Magick (with a capital M and a ck) are a thing, but I'm pretty sure that you're not writing about that in your fantasy setting.  If you are, feel free to disregard and have fun with mages that can't fireball.  Everyone else, STOP IT!!!!!  You're not fooling anyone into thinking that you're "legit" or "have new ideas." In a fantasy setting magic == magick == magik, no ifs ands or buts, and that goes for anything else with a c that you're substituting a ck for, or a k you're subbing in a hard c for, it doesn't matter, don't do this.  If you commit this sin you will be condemned to the ninth circle of hell, to warm Satan's juice crew for all of eternity (with your mouth).  Do not pass go, do not collect 2,000 nuyen.

Sin the Third: Nu instead of new.  I... Just... no... ... ...  Please, don't...  I mean, English isn't exactly the most logical, or beautiful, or perfect, or languagey language out there, but why.  I may not have much respect for the language, but I'm not about to substitute a "u" for "ew" just because "it looks like a thing kids will do."  If you still feel the need to do this, remember this one phrase "If I actually do this and I get famous, no kid anywhere will ever use that word ever" and you should be able to prevent yourself from butchering this poor defenseless language any more than it already has been by Shakespeare.

Sin the Fourth: *h****e.  This is, combined with Sin the Second, is where we get names like Kharne (Carnage -> drop 2nd syllable -> C to K -> +*h***e = Kharne).  Other words that follow this rule are therazine and theramine and roughly a gogool other words, all made up by someone that thought they were being hhote shhite, when they decided to do it but didn't realize that everyone else was doing it too.  No matter how much to want to write that slashfic about your OC Phorne and his adventures with Spock, don't.

Sin the Fifth: Ps(pit it out you useless waste of air). The only reason we have "Ps" as an actual diphthong in the English language is because some highly educated idiots in the past decided out language wasn't already messed up enough by the Norman invasion, so why not throw some Greek and Latin false roots into the language, just so that eight year olds can will college scholarships for their amazing ability to spell words.  DO. NOT. CONTINUE. THIS. ABUSE. OF. MY. LANGUAGE.  I will personally hunt you down and shove those "Ps"'s so far past your colon you'll be tasting them when you burp, for a month.  And before you say anything, no, it does not make you cool to creatively misspell words beginning in 's' solely to make your word look cooler.  On a side note, I'm going to include the diphthong "ph" in this, because it really doesn't matter if you call your magical means of communication a phone or a fone, they're still the same thing (bad example, I know, but this whole sentence was written about the same time as the comment on ellipsises, so you can go phrack an asteroid.)  Also "ae" when and "a" would do, and "gh" and...  You know what, forget it, call them phayrighies for all I care, power to you, I hope you choke and die on all the extra letters.

Sin the Sixth: Doubling of consonants.  "But Professor P," you're saying, "that fragment doesn't have a verb." My reply is to beat you with a turgid fish.  At this point I'm nearing the point of incomprehensibility in my drunkeness, so you're going to have to accept my word that this is a Bad Thing™ and that you shouldn't do it.  I will be honest with you and say that it's so far down the list I didn't even think of it until Tusserk decided to say something and accidentally doubled the k at the end of e's name, at which point I replied that while the use of hard vowels at the end of a name to signify your's is a warrior culture is a thing, it's not actually a crime against all languages everywhere, though it's close.  In fact, compared to the others it's downright tame, mainnly because mosst peopple donn't go arounnd doubbling the midddle consonnant in their worrds.  In case if you were still wondering why it's actually a bad thing, look ye to the preceding sentence.

Among those things that don't quite make it into the category of sins, but merely minor annoyances, are:::

Left to Right writing bias: Because most of our exposure to conlangs comes to us though a couple of phases transliterated into the Latin alphabet and the occasional name, this doesn't actually come up that often, but when you start seeing the actual characters in a language, how often are they presented right to left, as opposed to boustrophedon, left to right, up to down, or down to up?  Those are all actual way of writing that have been (or still are) used in our world, ignoring such wonderful options as corkscrews, it doesn't matter, and "I write the words on bones and stick them in a bag, how the recipient reads them is up to the gods."

Subject, Verb, Object bias:  Forgivable because most (SVO and SOV the two most common structures account for three quarters of sentencing in the world, wikipedia counted) of the languages spoken in meat space are of the SVO orientation, it is, however, not the only form of structure found in natural languages.  But, I'm calling upon you oh nameless hordes of peoples making up languages to fill that empty hole in your life, make something that's VSO, or SOV, or even OSV.  It can be done, the Warao people of the Guyanas did it, so I'm sure you can too.

Abuse of the Common Ellipsis: I will admit that I am a major abuser of this beautiful collection of dots.  Every day I can be found using them, over and over and over...  But it's all right, really.  They exist to provide a visual cue for something that is lacking in a text based medium, namely the sound "um" or the physical action of rubbing your hand on the back of your head.

Umlauts (and other diacritics): If you're just using them because they look metal, don't.  They have an actual meaning, and you are ruining them, you personally.  If there is any higher power(s) s/he/they will take you behind the celestial outhouse and beat you with a hose if you use these beautiful symbols solely because they make Fáirïes happy.  However if you're going to use them for their actual meaning, namely showing with a specificity just what particular vowel sound you're trying to use, feel free.
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Offline Scrasamax

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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2955 on: November 24, 2014, 01:37:41 PM »
I don't know what the Professor is drinking, but I want some of it, and I think we should buy him some more of whatever it is.

Unless it's something like antifreeze, or bathtub gin


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Offline Pariah

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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2956 on: November 24, 2014, 02:48:17 PM »
Antifreeze is bad for you, it makes you blind, or puts hair on your palms, one of the two...  Bathtub gin, on the other hand, is outstanding.  And by bathtub gin I actually mean that awesome shine that my buddy James's uncle Jim makes.  Yeah, their family is distinctly lacking in the unique name front, namely because James is actually a Jr, and his uncle is using his middle name...  I gave up trying to figure out why they thought this was a good idea years ago.
For the love of meat, shut up! No one wants to hear your emo character background! My hands are literally melting away, and I'm complaining less than you!
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Offline MysticMoon

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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2957 on: December 03, 2014, 04:53:42 PM »
I hate trying to come up with foreign sounding place names. I don't think I cross any of those sins, but it's possible. I just kinda stare at the keyboard (well, mentally speaking since my most oft-used keyboard has blank keys) and see what jumps out at me. And then, while reading a book on Etruscan history, I realize that some place name I thought I made up turns out to be a real one I probably saw on a map somewhere and it got stuck in my brain, until one day it just kind of fell out onto the page.
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Offline Chaosmark

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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2958 on: December 04, 2014, 09:50:07 AM »
Yeah, sure, we'll post this here 'cause I don't really feel like making a whole new topic just to &^%$@.

My job doesn't pay me enough. No, seriously. I'm not talking about "industry standard", or "paying me what other professionals are worth", like I've &^%$@ed in the past. I'm talking about "for the level of work I do, my compensation is nowhere near enough".

A few months back, I was promoted (again), this time to Development Manager. Fancy words aside, this means I'm in charge of all software development company-wide, internal and external. Sounds great, right? Yeah, no. In the two months since they promoted me, there have been precisely 2 weeks when I haven't broken 40 hours, and both of those were so close to 40 they can be written off as anomalies. Every other week, I've broken 40 by a very healthy margin. And my compensation? Nowhere near enough. Yeah, sure, I got a raise along with the promotion. But it sure as hell doesn't cover the new responsibilities.
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Offline Scrasamax

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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2959 on: December 04, 2014, 01:55:26 PM »
When your promotion to team leader/supervisor and raise only offsets the latest hike in Health insurance premiums.

 :Thud:


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Offline Chaosmark

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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2960 on: December 04, 2014, 10:01:58 PM »
That was probably the one good piece of job news I had this last month. Premiums didn't go up. Apparently they went down for our plan.
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Offline Scrasamax

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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2961 on: December 06, 2014, 12:31:59 AM »
That was probably the one good piece of job news I had this last month. Premiums didn't go up. Apparently they went down for our plan.

Okay, actually for 2015, our premiums haven't gone up, but I still haven't emotionally recovered from the 50% rate hike from last year, and no that is no exaggeration, my premium increased 50% from 2013 to 2014.


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Offline MysticMoon

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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2962 on: December 09, 2014, 12:28:13 PM »
Stab, stab, stab

"I swear I'm not insane"

Stab, stab, stab

"Why do you keep trying to move out of the way? You need this. I'm only looking out for you!"

Stab, stab, stab

"There now, isn't that all better?"
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Offline Silveressa

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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2963 on: December 12, 2014, 06:54:37 PM »
Turn about's fair play..

"Lesbian gamers, sometimes we use our hands for other things."

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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2964 on: December 18, 2014, 09:10:06 PM »
For  easier reference for peoples modern day rpg's:

Female Police Officers across the world (click picture to enlarge.)

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Offline valadaar

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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2965 on: December 18, 2014, 10:17:37 PM »
Um. Some are large enough already. And the Pakastani ones look like you really don't want to mess with them...


   
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Offline MysticMoon

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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2966 on: January 09, 2015, 07:32:25 PM »
I used QWERTY for something like 25 years (took a summer typing class on typewriters at the local JC at age 10). I'd always heard about Dvorak and its claims of being able to reach 120+ speeds. I tested in the high 80s (85-87-ish) and being able to type even faster intrigued me. So, 3 years ago I decided to check it out.

I read a number of accounts of those who had switched. At first, I was disillusioned, because the experience of many was a *decrease* in typing speed, even after long years of using it. But... and this is what eventually caused me to switch, I read numerous accounts of diminished wrist fatigue. Pretty much every day I would deal with sore wrists, as I type a lot. Between IMing, forum posts, my day job, writing (well, not as much of that as I'd like), etc, it was not comfortable for me.

So, I did it. I spent a few weeks taking an online tutorial to learn to touch type in Dvorak. Once I had it down, I switched, and never went back (except for virtual keyboards).

At first it was *intensely* frustrating. I tested at about 22wpm. Not fun. It was like I'd suddenly developed a speech impediment.

I spent a lot of time on 10 Fast Fingers, doing practice test after practice test (746 during 2012) and oh-so-slowly watched my speed increase. Eventually, I gave up with practice after I reached the high 70s, low 80s average with the basic test (which consists of the top 200 words; not exactly sure how they figure that).

And my wrists have been pain-free ever since.

Just out of curiosity, I went back in to 10 Fast Fingers and did some quick tests. And I hit a speed of 93wpm. A few more tests dropped my average down to the 80s, but I had never, ever hit 90 on a speed test before. I'm running through the practices lists of the top words, bumping up my speed (99 on the top 50, which is not a good indicator of overall speed, but still). I'll stop when I hit 100wpm on the top 1,000 words.

Pain free and faster. It was totally worth it.
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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2967 on: January 17, 2015, 08:43:46 AM »
No matter how useful, coming face-to-face with one's own character flaws *always* sucks.

Recognizing how that very same character flaw has caused numerous personal setbacks and conflicts also sucks.

Realizing that knowledge gives one the power to fix said flaw is less sucky, but also means a lot of work.

Overcoming a flaw, on the other hand, is a powerful thing and makes future existence that much more enjoyable and worthwhile.

Introspection is a real &^%$@, but without her I'd still be a miserable bastard.
« Last Edit: January 17, 2015, 08:45:40 AM by MysticMoon »
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The old man, grey-haired, braid hanging down.
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Offline Pariah

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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2968 on: January 17, 2015, 12:35:53 PM »
Alright, I've got a six pack of beer, one in the fridge from a couple of nights ago, a bottle of whiskey, and 5 hours until I have to fall asleep; (<- an example of proper use of the poor, maligned semicolon) it's time for drunken Pariah again.  Goss, I don't have the mechanics of 4 memorized like I do for 3.5 and Pathfinder, so anything I get wrong please, please, please correct.  I mean it, I won't get angry, so long as you don't call me an idiot or anything...  Not that I'm not an idiot, but stating the obvious has always annoyed me.  :mrgreen:

In the Moonhunter 3.5 vs 4e thread I made the bold comment that 4e either went too far, or not far enough, a claim that I stand by now.  The issue at hand is the Powers (I have the book in front of me so I know that they are in fact called powers, a point I wasn't entirely sure about before.)  Anyway, like I'd said in the post, I have NO problem with a tabletop game that hews closer to MMORPG type mechanics, even though the mechanics behind such a system would possibly put it closer to skirmish game than a "true" RPG, but with the exception of certain naysayers, sometimes all you want is dead men's blood on your hands and to hear the screams of their widows as you drive them before you, with the cheerily burning wreckage of their village back lighting you.  Now that I've implanted that awe inspiring image in your head, I will proceed.

My claim comes down too two basic points.  1) 4e went "too far" to appeal to the traditional DnD crowd and 2) 4e didn't go far enough.

Begining with point 1, the weakest of the two.  Because I can't prove logically that it went "too far" I'm forced to rely on made up statistics, which prove that 72% (please note, this number was made up on the spot) of DnD players that entered the game more than 5 (please note, I made this number up too) years before 4e's release didn't like 4e.

I will admit though, that backing up my claim like that leaves a bad taste in my mouth, so I must instead point to the creation and success of Pathfinder (aka 3.75, or 3.5.5 depending on your personal preference (please note that, as far as I know, I just made up the 3.5.5 right now, but if it catches on I will be happy :P) as a system.  Fueled largely by the desire for people to not leave the comfort of their 3.5 existence but still wanting the convenience of preprinted/balanced adventures, Pathfinder has allowed them to have their cake and eat it too.  Others, like in edition wars of the past, haven't left the edition they learned to play the game on, declaring it (the edition they learned on, for my clarity more than yours) morally and statistically superior in every way to those later systems that sold out to the (insert your personal least favorite group here: corporate interests, vampire the masquerade players, power games, larpers, munchkins, et cetera, et cetera).

But point 1, despite that being the point that Goss latched onto (hi Goss, I don't hate you, it's just you're the only person that defends 4e on the forum, and so you're probably going to be picked on a lot in this article.  I'll buy you an ice cream cone if you're ever in north Florida to make up for this.) hinges on the addition of "powers" to DnD.  These are the point where I feel like WotC had the most conceptual space to work with and totally bungled it because they couldn't abandon traditional "DnDisms." And, yes, DnDism is a word I just made up now, and, as such, is barely defined, mostly revolving around the continual status of charisma as a dump stat and 3-18 +/- 2 as the space for stats to occupy.  By adding Powers to DnD they fixed a problem that most people didn't need to be solved, while, generally, not adding anything interesting to the game to make up for the added complexity.

STOP!  It's mechanics time!

Before anyone calls foul, I will admit to cherry picking my examples, so don't call me on it.

To provide an example of fixes that didn't need to be made I will be copypastaing some stuff from the 4e SRD (or whatever it was called) (or not, because I can't actually find Powers and their descriptions online right now...  For shame, we're now relying on my brief description of powers and why their existence is silly)

Paladin - Lay on Hands - Level 1 At-Will

What was, previously, a common and expected feature of the Paladin class is now one of your two (in the whole lifetime of your character you can have 2 at-will abilities, no more, no less.  You can switch one out when you level up, but you'll never have more than two {in addition, please note that this isn't the only way to gain powers that you can use at-will, it's just referred to as "at-will" Powers in the PHB despite there being some utility powers that can be used at will.}) at-will power that your character gains power to.  So by "adding features" they actually took something that was one of the selling points of a class and gimped it.

Ranger - Twin Strike - Level 1 At-Will

If it seems like I'm picking on At-Will powers, it's because I am.  These are the things that you should be using literally always.  Otherwise you shouldn't have them and should just be rolling attack versus AC, instead we get stuff like this:

"Standard Action - Melee or Ranged
Must be wielding two weapons
Targets one or two creatures
Attack at Strength (for melee) or Dexterity (for ranged) vs AC.
Hit for 1 weapon damage + Dex.  This increases to 2 weapon damage + dex at level 21."

Well la di da.  (I have, at this point, descended into a stereotypical Southern accent)  I done get to ignore the penalty for attacking with two weapons...  Ain't that just grand.  Back in my day you took that penalty and were glad for it, you said "thank you" and "can I have another, sir", and you then proceeded to design your character so that the -10% to hit modifier in no way shape or form offset the +100%/rd damage bonus.

Basically every at will Rogue power involving stealth checks.

I'm just going to write down what they all say as the effect, all of which were covered by a feat or class ability in 3.5.  I'm going to be perfectly honest and say that none of the rogue utility powers are anything but rewritten feats/class abilities, and if I'm only getting a handful of these things I shouldn't have to waste it on stuff like this when I should be getting new and interesting ways to end my foes and drive their womenfolk before me whilst revelling in their lamentations and woe.

"You can move your full speed and take no penalty to your stealth check"
"Even if an enemy has clear line of sight to you, if they don't beat your stealth check with their perception roll they can't see you"
"As long as you end your turn in cover, you can move your full speed and take no penalty to your stealth check.  You also remain unseen while moving"

A lot of the rogue's movement powers fall under the same space of, "I know I saw a feat that let me do that back in 3.5.

WIZARD1!!1!!

I hope you like actually being a sorcerer, because that's what you are.  SURPRISE! No more are you invincible with proper spell selection but weak to surprise attacks, now you have a list of 15 (yes ladies and gentlemen, a whole gods be d**ned 15) spells that you know at level 20.  Sure, you're more survivable on the low end, but after that, well...  At least the 3.5 sorc got to know 43 different spells at level 20, so he's actually better off than you.  Here's your dramatic re-enactment of the scene in WotC's 4th Edition Writing Room, with Johnathan White, the man in charge of fixing the 'Wizard Problem.'  Upon realizing that he could constrain them to the same rules everyone else was following, he stood up and screamed out over the top of his cubicle, "HOW DOES THAT FEEL?  THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT FOR BEING ABLE TO WISH ALL YOUR PROBLEMS AWAY &^%$@.  IF YOU COULN'T DO THAT IN ALL THE OTHER EDITIONS WE WOULDN'T HAVE GONE WHOLE HOG AND SLAPPED YOU IN A GOD-d**nED GIMP SUIT!  &^%$@..."

Which brings me to point number duex "they didn't go far enough."

Powers are an amazing conceptual space.  You can differentiate between classes while at the same time making sure that each class has an actual role in a balanced party.  Rogues can be good at skillish stuff and brutal in combat as long as their properly placed, fighters can be good at staying alive and generally average as far as dealing damage goes, wizards can slay whole battalions of mooks but still die to a well placed knife.  (I would like to thank Steven Brust for the most wonderful quote on squishy wizards EVAH, namely "No matter how subtle the wizard, a knife between the shoulder blades will seriously cramp his style.”  If you haven't read his Vlad Taltos books, you should, I'm totally not joking.)  The whole Powers thing is why I said that they should've just made a new RPG to start working on them as opposed to trying to shoehorn them into DnD.  Basically every computer RPG that doesn't use a tabletop system has relied on something similar to what WotC was trying to do with 4e's powers and, with the obvious exception of Bioware's ME and DA universes, has done it with significantly more risk than WotC would ever face from trying to sell a new system.  And, most importantly for the effective sociopathness of megacorps, generally make back their initial investment (even if they're not actually profitable, but that's mainly due to the inherent systemic advantages held by WoW), which, in case if you were wondering, is generally higher than the cost of making a PnP RPG.  Why am I going through all this, you ask, to which I reply, because it proves that 'powers' as a thing CAN work.  WotC unfortunately, in my opinion, took a lukewarm approach to trying to adapt them to the tabletop.

Rather than trying to staple these potentially awesome powers onto a system that, quite frankly, can't deal with them, my personal opinion is that they should have just started a new system that used only powers.  It would've allowed them to ignore such wonderfully useless things as the Strength, Constitution, Dexterity, Wisdom, Intelligence, and Charisma staples of oDnD while potentially grabbing a not insignificant portion of the market share from competitors.  Sure, it would mean that they'd get less DnD sales, and that they'd have had to make two different teams for a DnD 4e and WTF-Totally-Not-DnD, but both products would likely have been better, and would be able to cross pollinate without causing as much internet ranting as 4e as released did.

Example time...

Rather than split the Powers into Daily - Encounter - At-Will they could have just as easily given each power that you got a cool down time, in rounds.  So powers like "your opponent dies instantly" get cooldown times of 12 rounds, while powers like "deal 2x damage to target" get something like 4 rounds, and "do nifty thing while dealing 1x damage to target" get a cooldown time of one.  The biggest complaint that someone can level against this system is that there is, almost always, an optimal path to follow, namely "kill someone instantly" "2x weapon damage" "nifty" "nifty" "nifty" "2x weapon" so on and so forth, however that's not all that much different from the D-E-AW system in place now where the optimal solution is Encounter, Encounter, Encounter... At-Will, At-Will, At-Will... OMFG we're about to die Daily, Daily, Daily...  The cool down model at least allows the players the ability to use those (theoretically) awesome Daily powers on a regular basis, as opposed to once in a blue moon.

Actually seperate the active and the passive abilities. 

While in 3.5 feats had to cover both "things that constantly improve you" and "awesome things you do" 4e should have separated things that could be covered by a passive ability and things that were awesome to do.  The Rogue abilities I paraphrased are a perfect example, all of them were move abilities or interrupts (it's been awhile, I'm assuming that's roughly equivilent to a free action) that could have just as easily been a feat tree.  Feat 1 "You can move at full speed without taking a penalty to your stealth checks" Feat 2 "As long as you're in cover, if an enemy later gains line of sight, if they don't beat your stealth check with their perception, you remain hidden" Feat 3 "As long as you begin and end your turn in cover, you don't leave stealth."  Those are all passive abilities, I shouldn't have to waste my awesome quota on them.  Power Attack is the same, only in the opposite direction.  It should be a power that reads "At-Will - Attack-2 vs AC - 1W+2 (blah blah blah, increased damage, blah blah blah, 2 handed weapon, blah blah blah, every 10 levels, blah blah blah) damage."

Prevent "Feat/Spell Bloat"  && Provide interesting things to do

These two actually feed into eachother.  Every level should be an awesome level.  Gaining HP isn't awesome, gaining a new passive ability to allow you to do what you're good at more often is awesome, gaining an awesome new way to kill your enemies is awesome, differentiating your particular fighter from all the other fighters is awesome.  What's not awesome is having to slog through 200 possible choices of what you should do now that you've gained a level.  I should be able to figure out how I want my character to evolve without putting hours into each individual power/feat selection, I should be able to make the things that I like doing more powerful (whether this is just a numerical 3x weapon damage versus 2x weapon damage or if it adds a nifty new effect is up to the designer, but the player should be rewarded for how they want to play their character, not constantly reminded that there's a new ability they could be using that does about 70% of the awesome things their old one does, and 50% more damage, thus being 1.2 times better than the old one, despite doing 70% of what made you like the ability in the first place.)

There's more points I could cover, but I'm tired and I think I covered the main ones that I noticed.  I'll read through this sober and see if I missed anything, otherwise I think I covered why I think 4e could've been an incredibly innovative game for the tabletop and why it shouldn't have been under the DnD label, instead being a new IP under the WotC banner... Thoughts?  Comments?  Concerns?  Jeers???  Let it all out, for this thread knows no bounds, and short of insulting ones mother, carries with it no rancor or remorse.
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Offline Murometz

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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2969 on: January 17, 2015, 12:39:23 PM »
*sprinkles a vial holy water on Pariah*
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Triumph of the Dungeon Master!

Ah, how I have come to love that sense of accomplishment and victory that I get when I pull the wool over the eyes of a clever player character. What DM Triumphs have you had?

Some of mine:
1. Finally killing an incredibly powerful, lucky, annoying player's character.
2. Finally achieving a TPK (Total Party Kill)
3. Finally achieving a TPK using only traps
4. Finally working out how to make it so that d**n wizard doesn't steal the spotlight all the d**n time.

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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2970 on: January 18, 2015, 05:38:11 AM »
Fascinating read, Professor P. Expound away :)
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He is clothed in faded brown robes.
His craggy face is turned up, bathed in moonlight;
He looks for his goddess to smile upon him.

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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2971 on: February 16, 2015, 06:54:29 AM »
Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said the Ark wasn't leaving till 5.
Sincerely,
Unicorns
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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2972 on: February 16, 2015, 08:26:49 AM »
Dear Unicorns,

I do apologize regarding the mixup.  After a brief discussion with my children and their spouses, and some pleading with The Unspeakable, it was decided that you would look so much prettier with no hair and some fins.  Best wishes in your new aquatic life.

Very Respectfully,
Noah son of Lamech
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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2973 on: February 18, 2015, 03:52:07 AM »
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Re: The Call of Captain-thulhu
« Reply #2974 on: Yesterday at 02:59:26 PM »
I recently traveled around my homeland, Norway.

While in a fjord with tremendously high, steep mountains on all sides the tour guide told us a nice little story.

High, high up on the mountainside was a small settlement. A farm. Above it a huge rock was suspended, still attached to the mountainside by some miracle - for it looked truly ready to drop at any moment.

Back in the day, while the farm was still settled, they used to tie the kids with a rope around their waist. That was because 6 men and children had dropped to their death after one fatal misstep. The settlement was on a slippery slope, and when you lost your footing you would drop down a thousand feet to the rocky shore beneath.

Another settlement on the opposite side of the fjord was less steep. Indeed if was the most prosperous location in the fjord, and that was because you had to climb several ladders to get there. Really, really long ladders. So when the tax collector came visiting, the local famers just pulled up the ladder and the tax collector had to turn around and go back home.
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