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Author Topic: Funny Soundbites!  (Read 2092 times)

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Offline Murometz

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Funny Soundbites!
« on: May 17, 2006, 05:54:38 PM »
I know we probably dont have a slew of sports fans here, but you dont have to be one to get a laugh from a few of these quotes from the wide world of sports :D


"I dunno. I never smoked any Astroturf."
-Tug McGraw, asked whether he preferred grass or Astroturf

"There is one word in America that says it all, and that word is, 'You never know.'"
-Pitcher Joaquin Andujar

"Tom."
-Tom Nissalke, New coach of the NBA's Houston Rockets, when asked how he pronounced his name, 1966

"Better teams win more often than the teams that are not so good."
-Tom Watt, ex-Maple Leaves coach (his team was not so good)

"It's basically the same, just darker."
-Alan Kulwicki, stock car racer, on racing Saturday nights as opposed to Sunday afternoons, 1991

 "He (Julio Cesar Chavez) speaks English, Spanish, and he's bilingual, too."
-Don King, boxing promoter.

"This is really a lovely horse, I once rode her mother."
-Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator



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Triumph of the Dungeon Master!

Ah, how I have come to love that sense of accomplishment and victory that I get when I pull the wool over the eyes of a clever player character. What DM Triumphs have you had?

Some of mine:
1. Finally killing an incredibly powerful, lucky, annoying player's character.
2. Finally achieving a TPK (Total Party Kill)
3. Finally achieving a TPK using only traps
4. Finally working out how to make it so that d**n wizard doesn't steal the spotlight all the d**n time.

-Captain Penguin

Offline Catalyst

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Re: Funny Soundbites!
« Reply #1 on: May 30, 2006, 03:23:21 AM »
My initial response was to sue her for defamation of character, but then I realized that I had no character.
- Charles Barkley
"To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women!" -Conan

Offline Rei

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Re: Funny Soundbites!
« Reply #2 on: June 07, 2006, 11:10:06 PM »
Yep! some sounds funny (even though I dont get it)
"Mostly... Mothers have the best mood destroying ability"

Offline Murometz

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Re: Funny Soundbites!
« Reply #3 on: June 07, 2006, 11:23:42 PM »
New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers when asked about the upcoming season:"I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first."

Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh: "I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes." Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach: "You guys line up alphabetically by height." and "You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle."

Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan training regime of heavyweight Andrew Golota: "He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning regardless of what time it is."

Tommy Lasorda , Dodger manager, when asked what terms Mexican-born pitching sensation Fernando Valenzuela might settle for in his upcoming contract negotiations: "He wants Texas back." (1981)

Shelby Metcalf, basketball coach at Texas A&M, recounting what he told a player who received four F's and one D: "Son, looks to me like you're spending too much time on one subject." (1987)

Frank Layden, Utah Jazz president, on a former player: "I told him, 'Son, what is it with you. Is it ignorance or apathy?' He said, 'Coach, I don't know and I don't care.' " (1991)

Torrin Polk, University of Houston receiver, on his coach, John Jenkins: "He treats us like men. He lets us wear earrings." (1991)



Authentic Strolenite™©®

Triumph of the Dungeon Master!

Ah, how I have come to love that sense of accomplishment and victory that I get when I pull the wool over the eyes of a clever player character. What DM Triumphs have you had?

Some of mine:
1. Finally killing an incredibly powerful, lucky, annoying player's character.
2. Finally achieving a TPK (Total Party Kill)
3. Finally achieving a TPK using only traps
4. Finally working out how to make it so that d**n wizard doesn't steal the spotlight all the d**n time.

-Captain Penguin

Offline Mourngrymn

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Re: Funny Soundbites!
« Reply #4 on: June 09, 2006, 11:58:07 AM »
Joe Rogan UFC 52 when speaking about UFC Fighter Jason Miller "That boy has heart and skill. Look he has that retard stregnth."
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Offline Catalyst

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Re: Funny Soundbites!
« Reply #5 on: June 10, 2006, 02:44:19 PM »
"When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself."
Peter O'Toole.

"To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women!" -Conan

Offline Murometz

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Re: Funny Soundbites!
« Reply #6 on: June 10, 2006, 02:57:53 PM »
That is BEAUTIFUL Catalyst!  :up: (but not from sports). There is however a forum thread for regular quotes as well. I believe its one of Moon Hunter's personal canvases. If you find it, you'll see what I mean. :D This quote would be a great fit there.
Authentic Strolenite™©®

Triumph of the Dungeon Master!

Ah, how I have come to love that sense of accomplishment and victory that I get when I pull the wool over the eyes of a clever player character. What DM Triumphs have you had?

Some of mine:
1. Finally killing an incredibly powerful, lucky, annoying player's character.
2. Finally achieving a TPK (Total Party Kill)
3. Finally achieving a TPK using only traps
4. Finally working out how to make it so that d**n wizard doesn't steal the spotlight all the d**n time.

-Captain Penguin

Offline Catalyst

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Re: Funny Soundbites!
« Reply #7 on: June 10, 2006, 03:04:03 PM »
Sorry! Didn't realize it was sports exclusive.

How 'bout...

Shaquille O'Neal on whether he had visited the Parthenon during his visit to Greece: "I can't really remember the names of the clubs that we went to."
"To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women!" -Conan

Offline Murometz

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Re: Funny Soundbites!
« Reply #8 on: June 10, 2006, 03:08:08 PM »
BINGO!  :lol:
Authentic Strolenite™©®

Triumph of the Dungeon Master!

Ah, how I have come to love that sense of accomplishment and victory that I get when I pull the wool over the eyes of a clever player character. What DM Triumphs have you had?

Some of mine:
1. Finally killing an incredibly powerful, lucky, annoying player's character.
2. Finally achieving a TPK (Total Party Kill)
3. Finally achieving a TPK using only traps
4. Finally working out how to make it so that d**n wizard doesn't steal the spotlight all the d**n time.

-Captain Penguin

Offline Catalyst

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Re: Funny Soundbites!
« Reply #9 on: June 12, 2006, 09:18:13 AM »
"It's amazing that fans want to see me play. It's kind of scary. I guess that's what is wrong with our society." - John Kruk (Philadelphia Phillies 1B), on being chosen an All-Star starter in 1993

I found out that it’s not good to talk about my troubles. Eighty percent of the people who hear them don’t care and the other twenty percent are glad you’re having trouble.
-Tommy Lasorda
"To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women!" -Conan