Forty-Three days early, the world had come to a sudden end. I had a dream, a prophetic dream, the night before so I was well aware that I was living the last day well in advance. I got out some lost scrolls (well, found scrolls now) and did some crazy ass chants and was able to put the world in a state of Groundhog (in homage to movie Groundhog Day) so you wouldn't notice what was going on. In the Found Scrolls version of Groundhog I was able to subtley inhibit your grasp of reality to the point that whenever you were about to realize that the end of the world has come, that thought would be replaced by the memory of a failed attempt to access
www.strolen.com. Through this brilliant use of ancient triassic and jurassic metabolizing of grapefruit I extended the power to actually reverse the flow of time and reset the end of the world. This portion only ended an hour ago, so the continued forced memories of a failed attempts were no longer necessary since there was no worry about your conscienceness comprehending the end of the world since, as I have mentioned, it has been reversed. Many think you can go back in time by flying quickly around the world ala Superman, but the trick truly is in the grapefruit. So, now you can see the website again, lickety-split.
Subnote: As some may know, I have a few other websites on the host. In my attempt to get one of them working I tweaked the session location to allow it to work. It did work, because I am brilliant. Where my Einstonian brilliance did fail me was the in the Socratic method of asking revealing questions. Mainly, "Will this change adversly affect other said webpages." Through experimentation, I found that three page loads were no problem so I went to bed not understanding that 5 page loads later the site would come to a cataclysmic halt. Through further quantum ignorance, I had no idea that the website was down, ergo, I left it, it was working, therefore, it is working until I view it then it may be working or not and my viewing of it will solidify the truth, yet by viewing it I completely alter the truth. So, I finally viewed it at work and observed it in the action of being inactive yet didn't know if I could trust my vision or if it was simply Plato's shadows on the wall twisting reality.
Then came the path less traveled through the alternate reality of 'the terminal' and trying to retrace my faint inept steps through the caverns of a tired and demented mind in search of a grain of truth amidst the dunes of madness. Behold, I have the Golden Ticket and ate the candy and added it to my daily intake of anti-health food and was able to fix something somewhere. Later, I was in such a uncomprehensive mood that I started spouting and typing in a spout of ignorant philosophical untrue metaphors.
