Congratulations! If you ever enter the Porn Industry, you now have a professional name! (although Kinslayer already spilled the beans)
If you ask me, they all fit! (thats the inherent beauty of this nonsensical exercise). With out further ado, I give you:
1-Calico Kirkmont (you will never guess who this is, and I wont tell)

2-Shnapsi Syrbekksvingen!- AG (Classic!...sounds like Cervex Swingin')

3-Boo Boo Park- Strolen (WOW! thats a porn director's name if I've ever heard one!)
4-Sandy Devon- Appy (need I say more? thats perfect!!)

5-"Prince" Albert Gwyndale- Nobody (get it?)
6- 'Hansome' Magnus!!!- MJS :

7- Mouse Rapid River- Ria (hmmm..this might be the funniest one, but my lips are sealed

, Besides, there arent enough native american porn stars anyway!)
8- Benny MarXXX- Manfred (he only does the really hard-core stuff)
9- Sammy Johnson- Roack (get it?)
10- Gabriel 43 Terrace- hmm...I was stumped, until I removed the Terrace. Gabriel 43, the latest super-greatest inflatable man-doll for the ladies! *OR* Gabriel Terrace works too I guess

11- Casey St. Charles- Catalyst (very sophisticated!)
12- Eddy Tablerock- Captain penguin (if thats legit, its beautiful!)
13- Crappy Camella- Rei (dominatrix of course)

14- Samantha "Wolf" Neimitz (a german import, and quite the up-n-comer!)
15- Tasha White Plains (pale, skinny, but popular actress)
16- Scrasamax had a funny one, but I forgot it, and he didnt post it. (I do remember that he was our representative from the Far East)