Always remember: the optimal way to kill something is the way which presents least danger to you.
"I was born close to the ground and I will stay close to the ground. Thank you very much." - Doublelock, gnomish rogue and kleptomaniac. Hated heights.
"I like shiny things." - Doublelock
"Keep your hands the hell off of my clothes." - Delia Siannodel, half-elven bard. She was in the same party as Doublelock, and had silver buttons on her clothes. No more explanation required, I should hope.
"Don't make me call a lightning bolt down on your ass." - Merrinjal, Vah Shir shaman (Vah Shir are cat people, if you didn't know) She didn't have much patience, and the enchanter annoyed her more than he did everyone else.
"What's this barrel full of? Oh, it's beer. I guess I could pour it out..."
"BLASPHEMY!" - Monk and Alex the Dwarven cleric
"It says ouch."
"I'm thinking we should run away now." - Dwarf paladin and GM
"I'll have one of those!"
"Uh, Cinnamon, that just put two dwarves on the floor." - Cinnameron the gnomish enchanter and Merrinjal. Cinnameron was overfond of alcohol. Upon reaching a tavern, the dwarves ordered the strongest thing available, and after one drink, they passed out. And, added note, we could never remember his name, so we always called him Cinnamon.
"I eat it." - Levi, the Ixxar monk (Ixxar are lizard people) If it was organic and not moving, he'd eat it. Sometimes he wasn't that picky.
"You is an ugly." - a very, very stupid orc, who mistook a human rogue for an orc
"I throw the gnome." - Willa Killsmash, barbarian warrior/shaman. She said that more often than you would expect.
"It's not that big of a deal. If we run into something that'll stomp us, we just gate the hell out of here, and come back later."
"I can't gate."
"... Sucks to be you, then." - Gnome enchanter and Sasha the human thief
"Hey, if we're in a publicly accessible prison, my dad's a freaking pirate." - Sasha
"I fail to see why you need a thief."
"We wanted your father, not you."
"Take it up with the Freeport City Gaurd." - Sasha and the mayor of a halfling town
"Oh lovely. Here we are, trying to stop someone that the gods themselves fear." - Sasha