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Author Topic: Favorite Game Quotes  (Read 45257 times)

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Offline Kassil

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« on: March 11, 2003, 03:57:12 AM »
From in game, that is. My own, obviously, is in my .sig...

...The story behind it is convulted, by suffice that the players had managed to anger the God of Violent Death, War, Cruelty, and Pain. After managing to heroically drive the god off the mortal plane to his own realm once again, the players notice that he left his titanic two-handed bastard sword made of blacksteel and etched with blood-red runes embedded in the middle of the battlefield...

...So one player goes and announces that he's going to grab it. And gets fried by the god's raw anger, funnelled through the sword via a divine connection.

Needless to say, the player in question is more cautious about seizing random battlefield items left behind by powerful enemies.
"I grab the sword!"
"Mmkay, you're dead."
"What!?"
"You just grabbed the sword of the god you were just personally responsible for banishing from the world for the next ten thousand years. You just got zapped by around a billion volts of Angry Divine Power. You're dead."

Offline ephemeralstability

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« Reply #1 on: March 11, 2003, 06:16:36 AM »
"Now I'm inside the dragon I'm going to start hacking at the stomach walls."

The player succeeded in killing the dragon, but died shortly afterwards of oxygen deprivation.
"Happy is the tomb where no wizard hath lain, and happy the town at night whose wizards are all ashes" - H P Lovecraft, The Festival

Offline Ria Hawk

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« Reply #2 on: March 11, 2003, 03:19:59 PM »
"Oh... you're one of those..."
One of the members in a party I'm currently with is insane, and quite obviously so.  THis is because he is of a magical discipline that, while powerful, inevitably drives it's practitioners mad.  This is, of course, common knowledge.  So any NPC that meets this character eventually say this.
Sometimes angels fall from grace, and sometimes heroes die.

Regina Raptorum, Benevolent Mad Scientist, Writer of Psychos, Guild Mistress of Esoteric Lore, Losers' Club Alumna, and Authentic Wacko

Offline CaptainPenguin

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« Reply #3 on: March 11, 2003, 04:25:15 PM »
This comment needs some setting up. In my game, there is a rather random, very comical event that happens occasionally called the Dwarf Conspiracy. The dwarves of the Dwarf Conspiracy are trying to make five of every single being in the multiverse because they believe that the evil Other Ones are going to wipe it clean of all life. They have a magical cavern fortress that they think will protect them from the Other Ones.Unfortunately, the Dwarf Conspirators are ridiculously stupid and inept and always get it wrong. One of my player's characters got stump-drunk and was picked up by the Dwarf Conspirators and made to mate with a sandwich.

"You wake up with a splitting head-ache, water dripping in your face. You are in a dark cave, the only light coming from a tunnel in the wall. There's a smashed sandwich in front of you. You don't remember anything from the night before after your eleventh drink."
"I want to grab the sandwich and eat."
"No you don't."
"Yes I do."
"Allright, you eat the sandwich, but there's some mighty strange mayonnaise on it."
Currently Reading: "Kafka On The Shore" by Haruki Murakami

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Offline ephemeralstability

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« Reply #4 on: March 11, 2003, 06:47:22 PM »
Ew.

That kind of puts a yucky twist on the next one I was going to post which is a maxim my players now have when encountering something new, exciting or unusual. Bear in mind, this is ENTIRELY INNOCENT!

"Don't poke it!"
"Happy is the tomb where no wizard hath lain, and happy the town at night whose wizards are all ashes" - H P Lovecraft, The Festival

Offline CaptainPenguin

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« Reply #5 on: March 11, 2003, 08:48:13 PM »
Yeah...I apologize for that comment. It was kind of juvenile. But it was so funny at the time! (By the way, the unfortunate sandwich eater was our friend, PriatePenguin)
Currently Reading: "Kafka On The Shore" by Haruki Murakami

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Offline Ria Hawk

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« Reply #6 on: March 12, 2003, 06:30:11 PM »
"Aggh!  I am the godsd@mned Queen of Thieves, and I can't even untie my ow f-ing hands!"
This was a character that I had in high school.  She was the greatest living thief in the kingdom.  Locks meant nothing to her.  Knots, on the other hand, were a different matter entirely.

"I'm mad, not stupid."
Same character, who was also more or less insane.  In one of her more lucid moments, someone asked her to do something that would have been suicidal.

"See, no.  You don't get to play with time."
This was a character that was, for lack of a better description, an uber-mage.  Time and physics were his playthings.  The above was said to a doppelganger clone that had tried to pass himself off as the mage.  And later tried to go against him in a magic duel.  Which leads to the next:

"Awww... He's so stoopid."
This was a catch-all quote.  For some reason, enemies consistently underestimated us.

"Oog."
This is a personal favorite, and actually spans multiple characters.  This is said after waking up after being clonked on the head, or having a few too many.

"That which does not kill you makes you stronger.  Having an outlaw for a friend will certainly do one or the other."
The outlaw in question was a very much wanted assassin with demon wannabes on her tail.

"Come, my trusted friend.  Let us go turn the bad guy's hideout into a parking lot."
I honestly don't remember the situation, except that it was a very annoyed Shadowrunner who said it.
Sometimes angels fall from grace, and sometimes heroes die.

Regina Raptorum, Benevolent Mad Scientist, Writer of Psychos, Guild Mistress of Esoteric Lore, Losers' Club Alumna, and Authentic Wacko

Offline Karad'as

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« Reply #7 on: March 12, 2003, 07:56:00 PM »
This phrase i saw it in a movie from Athilla the Hun and i have remembered it ever since. A roman comes to ones of Atthilla's cities and said:
"This city is very beautiful, but civilization is for for the civilized".
« Last Edit: July 01, 2007, 09:03:19 PM by Ria Hawk »
There are only two unlimited things:
The universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not so sure about the universe.

Offline Fiokar_Dracolas

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« Reply #8 on: March 13, 2003, 12:29:27 PM »
I need to explain a little about the situation.

I'm currently a part of a dragonstar game. With the exception of the PCs, everyone on the flagship is either incompetnent of stupid(something of a reflection of the DM's personality). Our Captain will say this after the exceptionally stupid events.
 
"Riiight. I'm going to punch you now."

My favorite quote of all time belong to Monty Python:
"NO ONE  expects the SPANISH INQUISITION!!!" :mrgreen:
Anything is possible. Anything at all. However, probability is another matter....

Offline forgottengods

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some quotes
« Reply #9 on: March 14, 2003, 02:56:47 AM »
ok here are some of my favorites:

" I can't hear them scream , but at least i don't have to listem to them beg " - Phage the untouchable

"Those who live by the sword will die by the sword."

"We have ways to make you talk , but you have nothing interesting to say"
« Last Edit: July 01, 2007, 09:05:32 PM by Ria Hawk »
the new gods of palladium have arrive  you can run and hide but soon you willl die.

Offline Karad'as

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« Reply #10 on: March 14, 2003, 07:23:05 PM »
This is a phrase that i heard not long ago:
Light a man a fire and he will be warm for hours,
Light a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
There are only two unlimited things:
The universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not so sure about the universe.

Offline Ria Hawk

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« Reply #11 on: April 02, 2003, 05:21:22 PM »
"I would very much like to blow before the cops show up.  Again."
This was said by a Shadowrunner I play.  She's wanted in two states for murder (which she didn't commit), and the group she with just annhilated a death-robot.  Of course it had a failsafe which reduced a city block to cinders.  The previous encounter involved a shootout, more explosions, and the destruction of a tavern.  

A little later, with the same character:
"Okay. Having established that everyone's alive, I suggest that we run like hell now.  My desire to meet the cops is only slightly greater than my desire to swallow flaming rats. In other words, less than zero."

A different character, same game:
"Can I please shoot her now?"

Ah, the smell of death and destruction in the wee hours of the morning...
Sometimes angels fall from grace, and sometimes heroes die.

Regina Raptorum, Benevolent Mad Scientist, Writer of Psychos, Guild Mistress of Esoteric Lore, Losers' Club Alumna, and Authentic Wacko

Offline Siren no Orakio

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« Reply #12 on: April 02, 2003, 06:52:45 PM »
"Congrats. You have demon-babies."
-- Said by the party theif to a horror possesed Earthdawn character of mine. Little explanation required, I hope.

Perhaps one of the more memorable campaigns I've been in, however, was a Shadowrun game in which my character was a Catholic Priest... with hermetic magic and, unknown to the party, a left cyber arm, complete with internal shotgun. In one particularly nasty situation, we had the party trog stand in the middle of a doorway, SMG in each hand, going full auto. It turned out that the best way for my character to add to the fight was to kneel down, and fire his cyber-gun between the troll's legs. While he was able to connect the muzzle flash and barrel report about six inches beneath his crotch with 'Father Max', he wasn't able to connect it with anything he knew about his priestly friend. Therefore, he looked down, and asked simply, "What spell that?"
My reply was to grin upwards, and reply, "Leadbolt."
"Trog like Leadbolt."

Later in that same campaign, after an incident with an oriental fire-mage and a fryer, came the line, "I grab the deepfried werewolf and run."

Offline CaptainPenguin

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« Reply #13 on: April 03, 2003, 04:38:57 PM »
"All Your base Are belong to Us"

"SomeBody set us up the Bomb"
Currently Reading: "Kafka On The Shore" by Haruki Murakami

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Offline Ria Hawk

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« Reply #14 on: April 11, 2003, 08:24:01 PM »
Now, this requires a little explanation.  I once had the misfortune to run a game with a player who turned out to be a bloodthirsty and semi-homicidal loon.  The party (at level 1, mind you) had just set out to see if they could find some bandits.  As they left town, they ran into an old man.  This is the following conversation.

Me: You see an old man on the path.  He looks tired and a little worse for wear.
Player: Is he armed?
Me: Um, not that you can see.
Player: I attack him.
Me: Uh... You don't want to do that.
Player: Yes I do.  I attack.
Me: I'm telling you, you don't want to do that.
Player: Well, I'm going to.
Me: *sigh*  You lunge at the old man.  He moves out of the way much faster than it seems like he should be able to.
(Now, that should have tipped off the player.  But no.)
Player: I attack again!
Me: Again the old man dodges.  He says, "I wouldn't do that again, if I were you.  You'll make me lose my patience."
Player: I insult his family and attack again.
Me: This time, he doesn't dodge.  But before you reach him, a swirling, sparkling mist seems to surround him.  It only lasts a moment, then there's a flash of light.  Your sword bounces off of dragonscale.
Player: ... What?
Me: You look up, and where the old man was is now a very large gold dragon.
Player: Uh huh.

To make a long story short, the dragon stepped on the offending party member.  The group had to spend most of the advance cash they had gotten to heal the character.  Now, the thing is, the old man/dragon was a character I had created weeks before the game started.  He was an ancient gold dragon who routinely polymorphed himself into human form.  However, I have never been able to convince the player of that.  He thought I did it because he was trying to kill an NPC.  He eventually stopped playing with me.  I think that's a good thing.
Sometimes angels fall from grace, and sometimes heroes die.

Regina Raptorum, Benevolent Mad Scientist, Writer of Psychos, Guild Mistress of Esoteric Lore, Losers' Club Alumna, and Authentic Wacko

Offline Duilwen Dairuin

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« Reply #15 on: April 11, 2003, 08:31:55 PM »
"The Authors name is I.P. Winkleman, and he has written other such books as: "Running with Short Swords." & "The History of Ladders part 1" Obviously a nut-case... "
 :lol:
"The creatures outside looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which."
-George Orwell.

Offline Fiokar_Dracolas

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« Reply #16 on: April 12, 2003, 01:20:01 PM »
Bloodthristy players. I know that problem. One of my own players, also at level one, decided to kill and other one in the middle of a town square in broad daylight. Needless to say he was seen, as the villagers sent a different PC to hunt him down. When they did get him, his god got a message through to him first and hit him hard with blue lightning (literally) just before the Innkeeper praticed the theory of "an eye for an eye".

Let this be a lesson to all. Beware what you do when you worship colors, PARTICULARLY when your DM is an avid video game player.
Anything is possible. Anything at all. However, probability is another matter....

Offline CaptainPenguin

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« Reply #17 on: April 13, 2003, 03:39:41 PM »
Uh....Please explain that and it's relevance, Fiokar. I have no idea what that could mean, nor what it could be in reference to.
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Offline Fiokar_Dracolas

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« Reply #18 on: April 13, 2003, 04:04:14 PM »
See Ria Hawk's last post. I'll try to keep on topic from here on in.
Anything is possible. Anything at all. However, probability is another matter....

Offline CaptainPenguin

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« Reply #19 on: April 13, 2003, 04:10:05 PM »
Ok, but I still don't get the thing about color worship...
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Offline Fiokar_Dracolas

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« Reply #20 on: April 13, 2003, 05:00:09 PM »
Just to be different, two of the players decided that their deity would be the color blue. They didn't think that I would actually go as far as to create a real deity that would be watching their movements. I decided to base the deity off of the charater Blue from Saga Frontier (a playstation game), and made him a lawful goodish person. Blue, by the way, is out to kill his twin brother Rouge, and thus hates the color red.

When the charaters went chaotic evil,  that was the equivelent(sp?) of them becoming red in the god's eyes and the rest is history.

Does that help?
Anything is possible. Anything at all. However, probability is another matter....

Offline CaptainPenguin

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« Reply #21 on: April 13, 2003, 05:07:18 PM »
Yes. And I have played Saga Frontier. Interesting game, yes. Ever played Breath of Fire 3 or 4?
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Offline Duilwen Dairuin

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« Reply #22 on: April 13, 2003, 05:21:49 PM »
I was unaware of any after the 2nd...
**Runs off to look into these games**
"The creatures outside looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which."
-George Orwell.

Offline CaptainPenguin

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« Reply #23 on: April 13, 2003, 05:41:56 PM »
Duilwen, they've also released Breath of Fire 5: Dragon Quarter
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Offline Fiokar_Dracolas

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« Reply #24 on: April 14, 2003, 12:42:33 PM »
'Fraid I haven't had the pleasure just yet. Why?
Anything is possible. Anything at all. However, probability is another matter....