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Author Topic: The Maggot says bye. For now..  (Read 2674 times)

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Offline Maggot

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The Maggot says bye. For now..
« on: October 19, 2005, 06:40:15 AM »
Well,for all those of you who have come to like and enjoy the company of this wee little fly larvae,unlikely as that sounds :wink: ,I have come to announce my temporary retirement from the wondrous hub of creation that is the Citadel.  

On the Friday of this week,I enter the service of the military,and take the first step on the path to becoming a mean,lean killing machine in the service of the nation.  :lol:

It would be nice if running around with a loaded M-16 was all there was to enlistment in the Army,but that is sadly not the case. The ardrous training that will soon commence for me,will keep me from my beloved Citadel for quite a long stretch of time. How long exactly,I have yet to know. But I do not need extensive information to know that it will be long enough for me to begin pining for the creative lunacy found in surfeit here.  :wink:

Wish me luck,Strolenites. This little Maggot is going to need it,if he's to become one of the best among house flies that there are.
“I'm yet another resource-consuming kid in an overpopulated planet, raised to an alarming extent by Hollywood and Madison Avenue, poised with my cynical and alienated peers to take over the world when you're old and weak.” -Bill Watterson

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The Maggot says bye. For now..
« Reply #1 on: October 19, 2005, 08:10:05 AM »
Good luck Maggot!!

Not sure how your military will do it but...

Use a ruler inside your creases to make them sharp!

Keep minimum folded stuff where they inspect and never touch it. Hide everything else.

Bring spray deodorant, easier to keep clean.

Treat it like a game and enjoy watching everybody else get all worked up about it. It _can_ be very fun!

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Offline Maggot

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The Maggot says bye. For now..
« Reply #2 on: October 19, 2005, 08:51:52 AM »
Thanks for the tips,Milord Strolen. My instincts tell me that the one which touches on the best way of escaping routine military inspections unscathed,will come in very useful indeed. Clothes usually look neater when I don't subject them to the rough handling I call ''folding''.


Quote
Treat it like a game and enjoy watching everybody else get all worked up about it. It _can_ be very fun!


I'd better hope my mad fits of giggling don't give me away,eh?   :lol:
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The Maggot says bye. For now..
« Reply #3 on: October 19, 2005, 09:57:50 AM »
Oh, yes, do try not to giggle. May gain you untoward attention.

We kept all of our daily use clothes in the dirty laundry bag. Used a clean shirt to seperate the dirty from the useable. We made our drawers up and didn't touch them again.

Short story.

I was on the bottom cot of the bunk beds, the cot above me was empty and so they didn't inspect it. It made perfect sense to me then to make my cot perfect, and sleep in the top one. Then making the top bed would take minimal effort since they don't inspect it and mine would always be shiny.

So, along with the cot, on the end you would tie your laundry bag, hang your towel, and set up your shoes. There were stringent requirements how each were to be positioned.

So, one night there was a midnight inspection. They come to me sleeping in the empty cot. Now, the inspector saw the bottom bunk with the laundry bag, shoes, etc., all set up nice but no body sleeping in the cot. The top cot had a body sleeping in it and was missing the laundry bag, shoes, etc., so there was a slight hole in my plan.

They didn't wake me up but I failed that inspection and got humiliated the next morning when they pointed out my little ruse. It saved me 3 weeks of bed making so it was worth it, but was pretty darn funny anyway.

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Offline Roack

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The Maggot says bye. For now..
« Reply #4 on: October 19, 2005, 04:48:07 PM »
Okay, They'll probably teach you this, and you may already know.

FOUR PRINCIPALS OF GUN SAFETY:
FOLLOW ALL WITHOUT EXCEPTION!

1. Treat a gun as if it is loaded at ALL times.
Did you look inside the barrel? Remove the magazine? Feel and look inside just to be sure? Good! IT'S STILL LOADED

2. NEVER point a gun at anything you are willing to see be shot or otherwise destroyed. You may also not point the gun the gun at your instructor. If you're going to shoot someone, go for the enemy.

3. DO NOT put your finger on the trigger unless your target is lined up with your sight. Always choose the safest possible direction and point to it. but remember THERE IS NO SAFE DIRECTION, only the SAFEST.

4. Be aware of your target, in addition to what is behind and beyond it. bullets rarely hit someone and stop, and there is ALWAYS a chance it will ricochet when aiming slightly downward (Rocks do that!)

Have fun and goodluck, Maggot! The Citadel salutes you!

P.S. I'm not sure about elsewhere, but in America they refer to trainees as "Maggots," (Or do so in hollywood) I guess it'll just be literally this time  :D

Offline CaptainPenguin

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The Maggot says bye. For now..
« Reply #5 on: October 19, 2005, 08:39:31 PM »
Le sad.
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Offline Wogden

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The Maggot says bye. For now..
« Reply #6 on: October 19, 2005, 08:50:05 PM »
There is in fact a fifth principle, but it has been lost to the mists of time. I believe it had something to do with not shooting yourself, but I may be mistaken.

Fare thee well, Maggot. I hardly know you, but hey.
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Offline Roack

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The Maggot says bye. For now..
« Reply #7 on: October 19, 2005, 10:45:29 PM »
Yeah, I guess that would suck too, though it's not as bad as losing a valued family member. And by "Family Member" I mean fellow Strolenite. And by "Fellow Strolenite" I mean Maggot.

We'll miss you man, just come back soon, or atleast sometime.

Offline manfred

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The Maggot says bye. For now..
« Reply #8 on: October 20, 2005, 06:15:34 AM »
May you dodge all the bullets and angry instructors that may fly your way. And have some fun, if at all possible.

We'll see you later then.
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Offline Ancient Gamer

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The Maggot says bye. For now..
« Reply #9 on: October 20, 2005, 06:54:03 AM »
I hope the military of Singapore has lots and lots of networked computers available to you. Then we might keep in touch after all :D

Good luck man! If you can get any education from the army: Grab it!

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Offline Cheka Man

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The Maggot says bye. For now..
« Reply #10 on: October 20, 2005, 04:38:47 PM »
You will be missed Maggot.I hope you manage to wriggle yourself back to Strolen one day.

Offline KingOfChaos

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Re: The Maggot says bye. For now..
« Reply #11 on: November 03, 2005, 10:27:08 AM »
Sweet :)

I joined the Navy last July myself...I ship to boot in April.
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Offline Bloodredblade

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Re: The Maggot says bye. For now..
« Reply #12 on: November 03, 2005, 05:00:37 PM »
 :'( Hey man, I don't know you that well, and even i'm going to miss the citadel's main insect larvae. good luck man.
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Online Strolen

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Re: The Maggot says bye. For now..
« Reply #13 on: November 03, 2005, 05:41:12 PM »
Cool, that is like hidden text. It is a spoiler post so we don't read it on accident. :)

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Offline Roack

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Re: The Maggot says bye. For now..
« Reply #14 on: November 27, 2005, 05:53:00 AM »
Mayhaps we should send Maggot a care package. It would be difficult, but He's family.