I also want to learn more, assuming your done posting what story you had.
What where the swords used for before? What makes them heirlooms? How did Hathil prove his fighting skills? If he's the head ranger, why doesn't he have some rangers under his command? Do both swords do the same thing or do they have seperate powers? Are the swords good? How can you tell and evil sword from a good one? Do swords that are good or evil have to be intelligent, have a soul, concience or otherwise; or can inanimate objects be good or evil? Will these swords scorch evil rocks or twigs? Go to Comment
I'm just happy these swords don't kill anything in one strike.
I just want to know more about the background of the item. Good submissions are thought out, they have stories surrounding them. They aren't something just smacked out on a keyboard in between classes. Take some time to develope ideas and the submissions will show how much better that time was spent. Go to Comment
Woah! Elfkin! Chill, man, chill! (Here comes my blanket metaphor again)
Think of it like this:
These swords are a blanket that you are weaving. It's a nice blanket, but there are some places where, maybe, you slipped up a little bit and left a hole, allright? When we give you criticisms on the item, we're helping you to patch up your blanket to make it even better! Go to Comment
Look, my writing skills need no improving though I was in a rush, I apologise myself for my lack of details but I shall do my best to correct my faults.
The staff is harmful as a stick when hit repeatitely on the target. The target will get hurt.
Um, have you ever had your liver burnt to a crisp inside your own living body? I doubt it's pleasant. Go to Comment
And the dragons and griffins are aware of their controle though they are like puppets and are helpless. They will be veangefull to the one who put controle over them when the controle reaches it's end. But most times, the wielder is running far away before the end of the enchantement. Go to Comment
I think the poisoning of the father line needs strengthening though.
What poison were the orcs using?
Where did they get it?
Stuff along that line.
Could develop into a good villian behind the scenes if set up well and ensure that it makes more sense why behing poisoned by orcs requires an epic quest. Might be a quest to find out what poison was used in the first place by capturing the person behind the orcs...etc. Go to Comment
While setting up camp for the night, the PC's are aproached by another group of adventurers who seem nice enough. The road is somewhat dangerous and the other group suggests camping together. The two bands split watches, one adventurer from each group watching at once. The night goes by without incident, the next day the PC's travel with the other group as they are going the same way.
The group consists of Hordel the ranger, who is skilled with the bow. Hordel is a quiet man who speaks little but appears quite skilled. Dremar is a barbarian who is a little excentric, he seems to be an excasive drinker and thiunk that battle is the solution to everything. He appears to be a stout and powerful fighter with his greataxe. Ferrin is the leader of the group, a rouge by trade. He is daft and witty, speaking with the PCs often and asking many questions. He fights with finesse with his rapier. Preminitat as a cleric but he will not say which god he worships. He uses his spells to empower and heal his party and fights with a club. He sticks close to Ferrin. Ferrin is a great talker and tells much of himself and his party, but asks even more about the history and capabilities of the PCs. He tells of some adventures his party has had, and they seem like an interesting group of mercenaries. Hordel is quite and has little interest in speaking with the PCs, he ignores most questions. He spends a lot of time with Dremar and sometimes Ferrin. Dremar seems to not care about any questions ansked to him, nor does he seem to know the answers. He seems battle hardened and is a simple man. Preminitat rarely starts conversations but will speak with the PCs. However, some of his accounts of the party's history seem to condradict those of Ferrin.
The Party spends another night and day with Ferrin's group. One of four things can happen on the third night.
1: While eating dinner around the fire, Ferrin gets into an argument with one of the PCs when he/she mentions the discepincies between Ferrin's stories and Preminitat's.
2: Hordel gets mad after repeated questioning about his life from the PCs.
3. Preminitat gets mad after repeated questioning from the PCs about what god he worships.
4: One of the PCs rejects the offer of a drink from Dremar and he takes it as an insult.
All of these scenarios result in a battle between the parties. If Ferrin's party is defeated and still lives he swears vengance. His party may then cross paths with the adventurers again.