I think everyone says the same thing about this, it is a fine story, that in the right context could be useful or interesting. I guess whether you like it or not depends whether or not you find that context interesting. As it is, I found little novel in this story, although it was a nice read and an easy diversion. Go to Comment
Should have posted it to Flesh it Out so we could help strengthen it some and fixed all your spelling to make it a more rounded submission. Great increase in useability though elfkin, great job. Go to Comment
It could use some editing, but the idea is really not bad. It would be even more useful, if, after throwing it, its wielder was still able to see it, and the light it produces. Go to Comment
hmmm, I would say this item could be borrowed from the ultimate equipment guide.....
There black light is considered to be invisible to people with only normal vision, but excelent for people with darkvision. Go to Comment
Definitely in need of some editing for clarity. The item itself is interesting, but not overpowering. Might be great for assassins, if it's not too awkward to hold. A few questions:
1. Does a user have any depth perception while using this?
2. Can the torch be quenched by water, blown out by a strong gust of wind, etc?
3. Is it self-replenishing, or is it consumed like a normal torch?
4. Will it burn something that is held directly within the flame? Go to Comment
Now what? What do you use it for? Elves use it for a decoration so why would they even think to use it in battle in the first place? You give no plot points to it, no special uses, only the vaguest of history that sounds like any other battle ever heard of.
The thing is we are looking for unique items with unique history. Need something special to make it stand out. They are too generic with little or nothing to use in it. Please read through some 5 stars and get a feel for what is a good submission. Look at the depth, detail, descriptions, and uniqueness of the submissions and then try and rewrite this one to add some things.
Wonder where the 5 vote on this one came from? Go to Comment
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