Strolen\s Citadel content. 
Divine One Chrysani
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Specific)
valadaar's comment on 2013-11-06 12:13 PM
Only voted Go to Comment
Divine One Chrysani
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Specific)
chaoticwaffle's comment on 2012-08-27 01:07 PM
Hmm. I actually hadn't thought of that inverse idea. That's quite intersting. Though a mortal would first have to find some way to get to the Gods' plane. Go to Comment
Divine One Hizeel
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Specific)
Scrasamax's comment on 2012-08-27 07:25 AM
Only voted Go to Comment
Divine One Hizeel
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Specific)
valadaar's comment on 2013-06-07 08:53 PM
Only voted Go to Comment
The 9 Divine Ones and 3 Exalted Ones
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Defining)
valadaar's comment on 2012-08-24 01:01 PM
Update: I put it into Draft Viewable for you. Go to Comment
The 9 Divine Ones and 3 Exalted Ones
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Defining)
Moonlake's comment on 2012-08-22 06:24 PM
Hi, Chaoticwaffle:
I know this is not your first sub but since you are still relatively new to the site, I don't know whether you are aware that when you input a submission, there is an option to choose the 'visibility' of a submission (this is the top drop-down menu located at the bottommost textbox on the RHS of the submission inputting page). To me, this sub seems more like a work-in-progress that would be more suited to being put into the In Work-Hidden/Private category rather than as a Normal submission (which is the default selection)

Also, to me, this sub seems more suited to the Systems-Divine and Spirits category rather than as an Article of the same sub-category but then this is a relatively minor thing and you can change the submission type easily via the drop-down menu.

Moonlake Go to Comment
The 9 Divine Ones and 3 Exalted Ones
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Defining)
Moonlake's comment on 2012-08-23 06:10 PM
First, you need to edit this sub so that you get back to the submission input page. When you say you can't edit the sub, does this mean you can't see the Edit link (in square brackets) at the bottom left corner of the text block when you access this particular sub? This might be a browser issue as I had trouble with replying to comments on my sub when I was using a out-dated version of IE and everything works fine when I downloaded Google Chrome. However, if this doesn't apply to you, then submit a bug report on the forum so that Strolen can investigate this issue. Go to Comment
The 9 Divine Ones and 3 Exalted Ones
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Defining)
chaoticwaffle's comment on 2012-08-22 03:16 PM
It isn't letting me edit this sub so I'm going to "add an idea".
I actually made this for a solely human world, however it can be switched over to a multi-racial world. Most of the subs coming with it will not speak of other races only humans. Go to Comment
The 9 Divine Ones and 3 Exalted Ones
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Defining)
chaoticwaffle's comment on 2012-08-23 05:57 PM
I did not see that. Thank you very much. Umm is there a way to get this off main page and into that category?
Go to Comment
The 9 Divine Ones and 3 Exalted Ones
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Defining)
chaoticwaffle's comment on 2012-08-23 06:18 PM
I will try a bug report. Thank you. Go to Comment
The 9 Divine Ones and 3 Exalted Ones
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Defining)
Vagoasdf's comment on 2014-10-23 02:58 PM
"The 3 Exalted Ones everything except for Earth and its inhabitants."

I think there is an error typo on this sentence. besides that, it looks really good. Go to Comment
Divine One Kolou
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Specific)
EchoMirage's comment on 2012-08-23 02:08 AM
Take a glance at the usual extent and detail of submissions posted on Strolen's.
Look at the Hall of Honour / Golden submissions, and consult one of the elder authors.

To get a good reception and provide something of value to the GMs who frequent the site, a submission should be more than an idea - a full write-up with useful original detail. Don't go below an A4, in general. Go to Comment
Divine One Kolou
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Specific)
valadaar's comment on 2014-04-03 10:54 AM
Only voted Go to Comment
Divine One Kolou
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Specific)
Ted's comment on 2012-08-22 03:36 PM
So, Kolou. Does he have a priesthood, sects, cults? How and why is he worshiped? How is he depicted, and what would someone see upon seeing his divine form? Is he opposed to any of the other 9 Divines, and what behaviors does he reward or punish?

I guess what I'm trying to get at is this submission is very sparse, and you have a lot of room to develop and expand your idea (which at current is a generic blurb that needs your personal polish to make it shiny).

Please, expand on your idea, give those bones some meat. Heavens know I'm not one for flowery language or Tolkien-like descriptions, but give us some intellectual fat to chew on :) Go to Comment
Divine One Kolou
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Specific)
Ted's comment on 2012-08-23 03:48 AM
I don't give out low votes (anything under a 3) that I don't check later for improvement. If I see improvement, my vote gets changed, usually upwards. Go to Comment
Divine One Kolou
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Specific)
chaoticwaffle's comment on 2012-08-24 01:46 PM
Some of your questions are explained in The 9 Divine Ones and 3 Exalted Ones sub.
I also added more detail of Kolou personally.
Go to Comment
Divine One Kolou
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Specific)
caesar193's comment on 2012-08-22 09:42 PM
What Ted said. Describing a god's (or Divine One, whatever) personality is fine, but I too would like more. I'll restrain on voting till I see whether or not you decided to add more, and flesh out the idea. Go to Comment
Divine One Kolou
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Specific)
caesar193's comment on 2012-08-23 07:48 PM
Me too. But since this one seemed the bare bones of something, I decided to wait. Till now. Go to Comment
Divine One Kolou
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Specific)
caesar193's comment on 2012-08-23 07:49 PM
only voted Go to Comment
Peripheral Beasts
Lifeforms  (Unique)   (Plains)
MoonHunter's comment on 2012-08-04 10:06 PM

Love the initial quote. The text is akward to read in spots. (I have only seen it since the wall of text has been broken).


Conceptually it is good. This post seems to be missing the answers to some basic questions and some immediate ones.


Where abouts do these monsters live? Do they attack other things than people? (I mean then why aren't the cities full of these things?)


How do we know about them killing things?  Perhaps description of the wounds? (and the result of an implied large claw)


The pack size means a lot of food that can hear them.


Sonar? They are stealthy, but can be heard.


They also seem to possess some form of intelligence as they appear to communicate with each other,  (replace the comma with a period).


If we can't percieve them, how do we know there are others (or groups)? How do we know they seem to be intelligent? How do we know they communicate with each other?


 


Good concept.  Execution just needs some umph

Go to Comment
Total Comments:
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