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Sanguis Isles
Locations  (Country/ State)   (Water)
Murometz's comment on 2012-09-28 12:35 PM

I'm torn. On one hand I agree with Dossta and Strolen's take (i even just up-voted the comment), yet I feel i have to add my 2 cents as well here, and stick up for caesar. This is a location in his world. He is describing a place, travel log style. It is geography with cultural, day-in-the-life bits, and it is as useful for gms perusing the site, as any other submission may be that features 68 plot hooks, and 900 ways to use a sub from a pc's perspective. I can actually prove my point by linking DOZENS of submissions here as examples of locations, tales, etc that feature NO plot hooks or any OVERT pc interest whatsoever, that strolenites loved and voted highly on. Why am I so sure? because *I* am a gm who peruses this site for locations (among other things) and find myself not caring at all whether or not a place has pc plot hooks or not. I can add those ,i mean, its my job to make up the evening's "adventure". But in the case of this sub, I can choose to use this geography and the cultural notes as a base, if for example, i don't feel like wracking my brains for a detailed location, where all the action happens. THEN, i can put whatever i want in these islands, and come up with 1 million different ways to hook pcs. I guess my point is i personally don't mind reading location subs that don't cry out to pcs. I can also steal the little things...like the "shit ships" coming in full of manure. Very flavorful tid-bit (seriously) Or the ghost rumors on Pravus, etc... Having said that, I do agree this place can use a bit more "oomph" :-)

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Sanguis Isles
Locations  (Country/ State)   (Water)
axlerowes's comment on 2012-09-30 08:44 AM
Ceasar I agree with your sentiment regarding this place completely, most writing for role-playing games doesn't have a narrative, but is piece of a narrative and the story of a character could certainly use a peaceful island. You we only have some many temples of doom. But you could add a few things that might focus on character interaction with setting a bit, for example what is the weather like. are their latent conflicts between the natives and the conquerors, who is the King and from who is he descended. If I visit the island what should I use for money, where should I stay, will I be able to stable a horse and then there are visuals. We don't have many. I am not saying you need all of this but I suggest you a pick a direct goal for what this piece is trying to communicate. Here some options to consider

Is this piece for strangers who have never visited the island, perhaps you could do it as a travel log entry, (steal the format from one the lonely planet books and go with that).

If this is a meta-piece for GMs then give the GMs a few sample scenes or something least they pull this location out their binder and watch the players eyes glaze over when you list off continuing fractions and imports. Obviously a GM will have to make up somethings, but you can fill a lot of gaps with suggestions of depth.

Is this piece designed to give you world some cultural vocabulary as you suggested, could this be where a character is from or place the characters have heard off. If that is the goal, what is the cultural baggage that they carry by being raised here. Obviously the will instinctively view water as more valuable then other players and they might in their heart the beach is always just right over that next rise, but that could be any island nation. What are Sanguisinites like how does their independant, stubborn, and resilient nature manifest in day to day life on the islands?

Overall I like the piece Go to Comment
Sanguis Isles
Locations  (Country/ State)   (Water)
Dossta's comment on 2012-09-27 03:33 PM
Where to start with this one? The islands are believable enough, I suppose. It is obvious that you put some thought into each island's economy and resources. However, they are just a tad bit . . . dry. I can't think of any reason to send a party here, and that likely means that my players won't either.

You could mitigate this by adding plot hooks, perhaps, but I would honestly go over the islands again and look at them from a game perspective. What makes these islands unique? Why would anyone want to go here? Do they hold something of significance (prison colony, rebel base, prominent school, precious resource, etc), or are they host to an important event of some sort (major battle, site of prophecy being fulfilled)? What are some major problems for the locals that the PCs could potentially help solve?

If you take the time to inject a little more color here, this could become something great. Keep at it!

P.S. The paragraph on Potens Island continually references Poena instead. Go to Comment
Sanguis Isles
Locations  (Country/ State)   (Water)
Dossta's comment on 2012-09-28 12:01 AM
I agree with you in sentiment, caesar, I really do. The entire world doesn't have to revolve around the PCs -- in fact it shouldn't, in order to preserve a certain versimilitude within the setting.

That said, I believe that most submissions on Strolen's are judged for their usefulness within a game. If there's no reason to send the PCs here, then the islands *might* make a footnote on a map somewhere, or might be mentioned in passing by a random NPC, grumbling about shipping costs. But that's it, really.

When it comes right down to it, as a GM we must cater to the party and to our players if we want to have a good game. No matter how detailed or realistic a place is, it will never see the time of day in someone's game otherwise. It's not that this location is *bad* -- your writing is rather good, and I like it's internal consistency -- it's just not very useful. Just my 2c, man. Go to Comment
Sanguis Isles
Locations  (Country/ State)   (Water)
Dossta's comment on 2012-09-28 12:44 PM
The added plot hooks do help to increase the value for this location. I'm bumping my vote up to reflect this. Go to Comment
Sanguis Isles
Locations  (Country/ State)   (Water)
caesar193's comment on 2012-09-27 08:04 PM
Yeah, when I wrote up potens, I had originally named it poena. I must have forgotten to change the name in the paragraph. I'll do that now. As for the use... I'll admit, I didn't write up Sanguis with a pack of PCs in mind. Sanguis Isles can be used as a hometown for the pcs, or as a place they gotshwrecked on while traveling by boat. You could use Pravus Isle as a way to get them there, but other than that, I wrote this with no intention of forcing pcs to it. If you want, send the pcs villain to a particularly storm cursed rock Sanguis, but it isn't necessary. Use Sanguis as a footnote, or a place the pcs sail by on some quest.

If you really feel that I need plot hooks I'll add them, but does every single country need to be pc-oriented? Can we not have one place that doesn't need a group of homicidal maniacs to fix there problems? Go to Comment
Sanguis Isles
Locations  (Country/ State)   (Water)
caesar193's comment on 2012-09-27 08:14 PM
Update: Fixed the Potens thing, and added demographics Go to Comment
Sanguis Isles
Locations  (Country/ State)   (Water)
caesar193's comment on 2012-09-28 10:02 AM
Okay, fine. I'll give in to the pressure and add some plot hooks. Happy? Go to Comment
Bloodmaw
Locations  (Area)   (Water)
Cheka Man's comment on 2012-09-18 04:30 PM
I like the magic war idea. Go to Comment
Bloodmaw
Locations  (Area)   (Water)
Mourngrymn's comment on 2012-09-20 11:36 AM
I had reservations about this prior to reading it, but was surprised to enjoy it. I like it. As Mystic states it is similar in vein to other stories of malicious seas in many stories, books, etc but I don't see a reason why its not interesting. I wish it was longer but I also realize it doesn't need to be longer. It is the perfect size for what it is, a myth or story overheard in a seaside tavern right before the players get shanked on a ship by being shanghaied or a simple trip across the sea. Go to Comment
Bloodmaw
Locations  (Area)   (Water)
Murometz's comment on 2012-09-15 11:47 AM

Interesting. Every major body of water needs one or more such mysterious spots. I'm a little confused by this line though... "The Bloodmaw's purpose is the add decoration, strategic depth, etc. to a map, not to provide a quest, though" Aside from that, if one goes with the twin giant sharks option, maybe the "red sea" around the maelstrom is not from the dirt at the sea's bottom, but from the various sea-creatures the sharks herd and devour, while chasing each other in circles. A sort of frenzied feeding. "Aye, Jimbo, the seas be red around the maelstrom. The Sons-of-the-Seagod be feeding again!"

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Bloodmaw
Locations  (Area)   (Water)
valadaar's comment on 2014-07-02 02:17 PM
Interestingly enough, unless this is some very tight waters, a 1 mile wide navigation hazard is unlikely to mess up a trade route, as reefs and shoals can do the very same thing, and are often easier to miss than blood-red waters.

It would be something ships occasionally would run into, perhaps after years of sailing the same waters, perhaps blown there by an unrelated storm.




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Bloodmaw
Locations  (Area)   (Water)
valadaar's comment on 2014-07-02 02:34 PM
Also, linkage is very easy - just surround the proper name of the target with square brackets.

In this case { Shnickels } with square brackets yields Shnickels


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Bloodmaw
Locations  (Area)   (Water)
MysticMoon's comment on 2012-09-18 09:58 PM
The core idea sounds a little too much like the Blood Sea of Istar from Dragonlance for my comfort. I would possibly vote higher if you put a spin on it and made it your own. The myths surrounding it could use some fleshing out as well. Go to Comment
Bloodmaw
Locations  (Area)   (Water)
caesar193's comment on 2012-09-15 04:25 PM
By the line, I meant that the Bloodmaw isn't a thing to be solved. There are no special McGuffins to end it, and save a couple of sailors. Its purpose is just what you said- a mysterious spot. That kills people. Go to Comment
Adam Smith
NPCs  (Major)   (Criminal/Espionage)
Strolen's comment on 2012-09-20 02:12 PM
I loved the intro story but then the actual person kinda fell flat for me. He is insanely difficult to use and the plot suggestions are very specific and require a lot of set-up. I like the mood it sets up A LOT and would enjoy it much more as fiction in its current state and would love to read a bit more about the crimes. Go to Comment
Adam Smith
NPCs  (Major)   (Criminal/Espionage)
Scrasamax's comment on 2012-09-22 07:06 PM
Well there's that isn't there. I'm going to go watch some Ponies now. Go to Comment
Adam Smith
NPCs  (Major)   (Criminal/Espionage)
Mourngrymn's comment on 2012-09-21 10:57 PM
I agree with Muro on the similarities of the character in Se7en. The story itself intrigued me more than it probably should have I think but I still enjoy the character as a villain.

On a side note, can someone translate what axle said? I went back and read the sub three times thinking I missed something. Go to Comment
Adam Smith
NPCs  (Major)   (Criminal/Espionage)
Mourngrymn's comment on 2012-09-22 11:53 AM
Adding in more of his background and history of his fall into criminal behavior would help. Especially now that apparently he is wealthy which I didn't gather from reading it.
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Adam Smith
NPCs  (Major)   (Criminal/Espionage)
Mourngrymn's comment on 2012-09-22 02:32 PM
Fair enough, and having a one shot villain to throw at the players is required of having an in depth back story. However as stated by caesar himself, Smith was granted with a huge inheritance that made it possible for his crime spree to begin. I am curious as to why this big inheritance was given and if it was the push that made him a criminal or was he a murderer long before he became rich?

I get the mystery behind not knowing is one for an outside viewer but for one to run someone such as him I personally like to know why he became the way he is, his motivation for doing it, etc. Me I just like to know everything. Go to Comment
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