Well it could that this is not that great a quest. I have been thinking about this since I typed it up the other day, and I have never been really happy with the way it ran in gameplay. I always chalked that up to the fact that it was run as early "go to" adventure with a new group, but I have noticed so general short comings of the adevnture.
First the PCs take a long journey that ends where they started. This is rather anti-climatic in nature, because the middle part of the quest is essentially a trip the hardware store.
The primary villian is muddled. The Shadow as a villian doesn't have enough personality to make defeating him a real joy.
The moral ambiguity of final conflict can divide the players rather than unite them. The last time I ran this some the PCs killed a number of peasants to stop the undead sheriff. This really pissed off some of the other players, and served to divide the party.
Finally very little is gained at the end of the quest. An old woman gets her house back, but the PCs get very little. Go to Comment
Well I don't mean to say it is bad or useless. But I have run it a few times, and it is a really simple idea stretched out with a lot of filler. There are ideas I may want to transplant into other things, but I still think the long journey in a circle is weak. Go to Comment
Update: This is one of my least favorite things I have ever written. I wonder that in 7 years time if I will look back at my writings I enjoy now and be as embarrassed. I tried to fix it up, but I think it is just a week idea. Go to Comment
Lots of game have first rank or first degree or first level spells. So it could be an endurance or manna battery with enough for two first rank spells. It could negate the penalities for the casting of one or two spells. Sure the example was system specific, but not so much so that it would not be as easy as breathing to adapt them to other systems. Go to Comment
I thought about the title a bit more than I should have, and I decided "Nomar Bracers" wouldn't be specific enough, any bracer worn by a Nomar citizen would be a Nomar Bracer. But if it something someone is inspired to correct, I am open to another title.
As to putting game mechanics first, this is entirely true. Go to Comment
My main issue with this is stylistic, it is the names. They are, frankly, in my opinion, terrible.
But I somewhat enjoy the social status quirk (given that social status is a big part of my settings), and the sun connection is interesting, though not revolutionary. Go to Comment
There are a few typos that spellcheck didnt find, mainly instances of the wrong word being used, done instead of down being the first that comes to mind. The power of the weapon is a bit hard to understand, that it removes someone from consensual memory, but ony for a little while, and said power is tied to the swordbearer's social status. I think that is a bit to inconsistant for my tastes. I did like how the sun would always find the sword so long as it was in the sky.
I liked the names at first, Applelonia (though I might have spelled it Appelonia), Sontecan, Fredomahat these had this great kind of mesoamerican feel followed by...Miguel? I didn't like that part of the name, and I know I shouldn't complain about that, but it really sticks out. Go to Comment