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Flowers Of Innocence And The Killer Of Undertown
Plots  (Crisis)   (Single-Storyline)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2013-05-10 09:26 PM
An interesting take on the flowers. The most interesting part of this, I thought, was having prostitutes wear the flowers of innocence. That's just... wrong. I mean, if the flowers affect them, then what's the point where they become children? Go to Comment
Flowers Of Innocence And The Killer Of Undertown
Plots  (Crisis)   (Single-Storyline)
axlerowes's comment on 2013-05-07 06:51 AM
fixed some typos, no new content Go to Comment
Flowers Of Innocence And The Killer Of Undertown
Plots  (Crisis)   (Single-Storyline)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-12-03 10:32 PM


I reject the idea of innocence=childhood or innocence=asexuality. Children are asexual, and children may be innocent but this does not mean that a sexually mature adult can not be innocent or loose innocence. You should agree with me.

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Flowers Of Innocence And The Killer Of Undertown
Plots  (Crisis)   (Single-Storyline)
Moonlake's comment on 2013-05-06 10:53 PM
It's great as a short story and a sub for the Oekaki challenge. I got slightly confused when the write-up switches from third-person perspective to first-person bu then I realise the whole thing is written from the killer's point of perspective. A great job! btw, you might want to link back to the original sub on Flowers of Innocence. Go to Comment
Flowers Of Innocence And The Killer Of Undertown
Plots  (Crisis)   (Single-Storyline)
Forganthus's comment on 2013-05-07 03:44 AM
I like this! There are some really good bits of prose in here (buildings holding on like ticks, masons and whores needed to wet their business). There's about a dozen typos, though (and I know it's an Oekaki), and in a few places the story sort of becomes difficult to follow. Go to Comment
Flowers Of Innocence And The Killer Of Undertown
Plots  (Crisis)   (Single-Storyline)
Forganthus's comment on 2013-05-07 06:26 PM
Revoted because of spelling corrections. Go to Comment
Flowers Of Innocence And The Killer Of Undertown
Plots  (Crisis)   (Single-Storyline)
caesar193's comment on 2013-05-07 09:07 AM
Nice take on the Flowers. I liked how they were used to help Kensu, and how the monsters in this case was a killer. Though I think you should mention how both Kensu and the little girl (and as many other people as you feel necessary) worship the great god caesar193, I won't detract points for this omission. But still, bonus points for twisting the Flowers into an escape aid. Go to Comment
Flowers Of Innocence And The Killer Of Undertown
Plots  (Crisis)   (Single-Storyline)
Gossamer's comment on 2013-05-07 02:19 PM

Interesting. Here are some typos and grammatical errors;



Kensu became used to feelings of guilt and shame

Kensu's handling of the dowry could not have come as a surprise.


his mind kept up a steady train of conversation


If Jua-awl was going to be so high and mighty about this he shouldn't have accepted the wager. If he cared so much about my fiance's family, why did he collect on the Wager,

what sort of a man, what sort of a bookkeeper takes a wager, collects it and then grows self conscious about how this bet will affect a family, and a wealthy family no less. I bet Jua-awl doesn't contact the brother-in-laws of the white washer men or stone masons he collects from.

row canyon between the two ridges held Undertown

An accomplished patron of vice like Kensu knew the glade

would force an innocence upon his pursuers, and hoped that this would spare his life. .

 

Sorry for taking a few creative liberties, some of it couldn't merely be corrected with a single word.



(Haven't checked the rest).

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Plots  (Crisis)   (Single-Storyline)
Strolen's comment on 2013-04-20 06:46 AM
Update: Updated formatting. Go to Comment
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Plots  (Crisis)   (Single-Storyline)
Scrasamax's comment on 2013-04-19 01:58 AM
Interesting group you have here, Some of them certainly have me itching to know more about them, especially Priest 2, some of the others seem a bit mundane, such as the Lifer or Sicko, whom I imagine as the head convict from Chronicles of Riddick and Comic Book Guy respectively.

I am curious to know what the intent is behind this group, because I assume it is something akin to M. Night Shamallamadingdong (or whatever his name is) movie Devil (drawn out, tedious in places, but overall good and interesting character study) Go to Comment
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Plots  (Crisis)   (Single-Storyline)
Dozus's comment on 2013-04-19 08:50 AM
Sort of feels like the setup of one of those cerebral Twilight Zone episodes that stay in a single shot until the final scene when something crazy happens. I'm curious as to how they all ended up in jail, particularly the clergy (harboring criminals in sanctuary? religion persecuted?). Go to Comment
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Plots  (Crisis)   (Single-Storyline)
axlerowes's comment on 2013-04-19 09:58 AM
These were/are character concepts for my friends one shot All Flesh Must Be Eaten Game, it takes place in a prison. I haven't seen walking dead (which I have learned through cultural osmosis takes place in a prison), and I only played AFMBE once. All I know about his plot set up is A: Takes place in a prison B: There are zombies.

Dozus: Please look at the post again, and let me know if it is still not clear why the Priests are in the prison. I Go to Comment
Npc Generator Pirates
NPCs  (Extras)   (Mercantile)
Strolen's comment on 2013-04-20 06:57 AM
Update: Updated some formatting. Go to Comment
Npc Generator Pirates
NPCs  (Extras)   (Mercantile)
Strolen's comment on 2013-04-23 02:35 PM
I don't like the path this conversation is taking.

I didn't take axle's comments to be too accusatory. More that he fixed the issue and was requesting a comment on the actual content vs. his spelling. (From my recollection, he admitted posting this while joining the Drunk Guild). Don't correct me if I am wrong axle. ;)

The interwebs does not transfer context or the intention of the comments very well. Go to Comment
Npc Generator Pirates
NPCs  (Extras)   (Mercantile)
Strolen's comment on 2013-04-23 07:16 PM
Now THAT is funny! Go to Comment
Npc Generator Pirates
NPCs  (Extras)   (Mercantile)
Scrasamax's comment on 2014-04-03 11:21 AM
I love this, and I wanted it printed out so I can use it to make pirates. Likewise, some of the terminology can be changed, like swapping pirate for mercenary, and you have a generator to create a rogue's gallery to fill out a wretched hive of scum and villainy.

I like the division into chapters, so you can create fresh pirates, salty old pirates, and everything in between. Go to Comment
Npc Generator Pirates
NPCs  (Extras)   (Mercantile)
Dozus's comment on 2014-09-08 04:49 PM
So cool. And useful. And rad. And pirates! Go to Comment
Npc Generator Pirates
NPCs  (Extras)   (Mercantile)
Murometz's comment on 2013-04-23 12:43 AM
Wow. I would add a press-gang element in there somewhere, unless i missed it, but holy crap this is useful. Go to Comment
Npc Generator Pirates
NPCs  (Extras)   (Mercantile)
Murometz's comment on 2014-09-08 10:55 PM
Only voted Go to Comment
Npc Generator Pirates
NPCs  (Extras)   (Mercantile)
axlerowes's comment on 2013-04-19 12:47 AM

Table 1: Courtiers and Courtesans:

Gain One Social Skill and Gain 5% standing for every chapter


0) Your pirate gets accused of stealing from the Lord and spends the rest of this chapter in the dungeon: (Minus 5% physical attributes, Minus 50% Wealth, Minus 50% Standing, Gain 5% reputation): Next Roll CC-3, SD, SS or LL+3 

1) Wrong side of the Coup, your pirate back the wrong horse in courtly power struggle and is forced out of court (Minus 50% standing, Minus 75% Wealth, 

2) Pirate is implicated in a plot against the King and is forced to flee the court (Minus 100% Standing): Next Roll SD or SW 

3) Your pirate gets a position as a man servant to a member of court, spend time pouring wine and moving chamber pots about: Next Roll CC or LL 

4) Your Pirate’s doomed affair with the spouse of powerful member of court is exposed (Gain one Enemy from courtier’s list, Minus 10% Standing): Next Roll CC-2, SD, SS or LL+3 

5) Your pirate gets involved in courtly rivalry and is forced to take sides (Minus 5% standing, Gain One Contact from Courtier table, Gain Two enemies from Coutrier’s table) 

6) Insult a peer get a challenged to duel: 1d12+1 for every combat skill
a. 1-8 loss duel received grevious injury: (Minus 10% reputation, Minus 5% physical attributes): Next Roll CC, SD or SS
b. 9: Draw: Next Roll CC
c. 10-12: Win the Duel (Gain 10 Reputation, Gain one combat skill, Gain One Enemy from Courtiers): Next Roll CC 

7) Get wrapped up in the court’s culture of gambling: Roll 1d12
a. 1-9: Lose 100% Wealth: Next Roll LL or SD
b. 10-11: Lose 50% Wealth: Next Roll CC, SS, or LL
c. 12: Gain 150% Wealth: Next Roll CC 

8) Work the Season at Court (Gain One Contact from Coutiers List, Gain an additional 5% Standing): Next Roll CC 

9) Your pirate has passionate but secret love affair with a member of the court (Gain one social skill, Gain only ally among Courtiers): Next Roll CC 

10) Get Appointed Diplomat! (Gain One Contact form Courtiers with a different Nationality, Gain One Language): Next Roll CC 

11) Advantageous Family Marriage: You or a member of your family marries an established member of the court. (Plus an additional 20% Standing, Plus 10% Wealth): Next Roll CC 

12) Gain a title! The king has bestowed favor upon you (Plus and additional 50% Standing, Plus 10% Wealth, Next Roll: CC+3 and at least +1 on all subsequent rolls on all charts except SW 

13) Access to the inner circle, your proto-pirate becomes an advisor to the King and is given a title land and influence: (Gain an additional 100% Standing, Gain two Allies from Courtiers, Gain 100% Wealth, Gain two Social Skills): Next Roll CC+3 and at least +1 on all subsequent rolls on all charts except SW

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