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Cloak of Sweet Devotion
Items  (Clothes)   (Magical)
Strolen's comment on 2006-01-12 02:49 AM
Unique and tragic. I like the tip that while wearing in battle keep away from arms as it tends to be 'clingy' that was great! Small change I would is make it itchy for anybody not in love instead of only for the killer.

Very fine item, well done! Go to Comment
Cloak of Sweet Devotion
Items  (Clothes)   (Magical)
manfred's comment on 2006-01-12 07:55 AM
I DO like magical items of this kind.

The cloak will find liking to those with a devoted heart, and little love for those not. Especially uncouth will it be to those that harmed its former favourite owner. I wonder, what would happen if a fitting wearer is killed by another fitting wearer (like in war)? Will the cloak hate the new owner, and gradually grow accustomed to it?


A great start. I am looking forward on other submissions from you. Go to Comment
Cloak of Sweet Devotion
Items  (Clothes)   (Magical)
MoonHunter's comment on 2006-01-11 01:59 PM
I was just typing in much of what Mourn just did, and he posted first.

I like the fairytale quality to the item. It is not your classic enchantment, it is an item of flux and passion.

Takes some paws up. Go to Comment
Cloak of Sweet Devotion
Items  (Clothes)   (Magical)
Nobody's comment on 2006-01-12 10:41 AM
I think that you dropped the ball there at the end. You had a pretty good story going, and then, when you get to Dovan actually wearing the cloak, you just hurried through it.

Also, I am not that impressed with the effects that were made for the cloak itself(mostly the shield). I think that you could have done better with this. It seems more characteristic that you might instead be aware of attacks from behind instead of just shielded from them.

Maybe when you wear it in cold weather, it keeps you from freezing like the warmth of a lover's embrace. And maybe you hear your lover's shout warning you of danger from behind.

This is the kind of descriptive detail that I would like to see with an item like this.

Despite my criticism, it is a good idea, but it needs to be done more artistically, with the painter's touch.

It looks like I will be the bad man here and give it a three. But I would gladly give it higher if you would fill some of it out. Go to Comment
Cloak of Sweet Devotion
Items  (Clothes)   (Magical)
EchoMirage's comment on 2006-01-12 02:57 AM
I certainly like it.
As they say, love is a kind of magic, and moments of passion may seem enchanted.
A very pleasant item, especially for romantic fantasy.
"Are you not afraid, Dovan?" a fellow soldier asked. "No, for my love keeps me safe." Go to Comment
Cloak of Sweet Devotion
Items  (Clothes)   (Magical)
Cheka Man's comment on 2006-01-11 02:31 PM
I like the way the magic comes from the love of the owner. Go to Comment
Cloak of Sweet Devotion
Items  (Clothes)   (Magical)
Michael Jotne Slayer's comment on 2006-01-12 07:01 AM
Indeed, this is a splendid item for a first try. Very good.
I like the way it was enchanted, I think everybody is growing tired of "the wizard who meddled with potions/curses/whatever".

Congratulations on a very fine first post Virlorin. Go to Comment
Cloak of Sweet Devotion
Items  (Clothes)   (Magical)
Ancient Gamer's comment on 2006-01-11 03:17 PM
This is a very good first post! I am impressed Virlorin! Go to Comment
Cloak of Sweet Devotion
Items  (Clothes)   (Magical)
Mourngrymn's comment on 2006-01-11 01:57 PM
A great first time submission. I am impressed. It is a relatively common tale of love lost. An interesting item with believable effects due to the reasoning behind it's production.

Love is a powerful thing and can outlast, outshine, and over power anything if given the right conditions.

Good job! Go to Comment
Cloak of Sweet Devotion
Items  (Clothes)   (Magical)
Mourngrymn's comment on 2006-01-12 01:54 PM
I dont think you are to far off base Nobody. By what your sayign I can see your reasoning behind it and it is definately a sound comment. Your not being the odd man out, you have just looked at it differently than I did, and apparently the others.

My saying always stands, there is no such thing as a bad comment or vote, only ones that are never given. Even a three has merit and sure it could use work, but we all have submissions that get good reviews yet still need much work. Go to Comment
Cloak of Sweet Devotion
Items  (Clothes)   (Magical)
Chaosmark's comment on 2007-04-23 07:49 PM
I like it. Items with this sort of origin lend a believability to their powers that just doesn't quite come with a spell-based enchantment. Go to Comment
Cloak of Sweet Devotion
Items  (Clothes)   (Magical)
Virlorin's comment on 2006-01-13 09:21 AM
Updated: fleshed out the ending per Nobody's suggestion ;) Go to Comment
Cloak of Sweet Devotion
Items  (Clothes)   (Magical)
Murometz's comment on 2009-01-23 09:54 AM
BUMP. what CM said. Plus, what a great name for an item!! Go to Comment
Cloak of Sweet Devotion
Items  (Clothes)   (Magical)
Murometz's comment on 2011-03-10 07:17 PM


Bump again, two years later. I like the way this ends. The murderer casts off the cloak for fear of what it will do next, and so it goes, another magic item "lost"...waiting again to be found, so it can "embrace" once more.

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