By shear volume and size this is fantastic and can easily be printed out and thrown into my towns/ villages folder for use on a random day.
1) Is there a town watch? Militia? Gaurds of some sort? I see where they are mentioned but a short detail would be nice.
2) This was stated prevously about the "bad". What bad has happened here? A riot perhaps in the Cracked Mug Tavern?
3) A few important or personal nps's would be nice, other than just the owner of this store, etc. A short description of a few of them that any players may come into contact with would be nice.
4) Also a few plot hooks would be well worth the effort.
Just a few basic ideas. I realize this is an older sub, and for a first sub this was grand indeed. Wish I would have caught it back when it was first put up.
Locations (City) (Any)
The description is good, implying details and explaing just enough.
There are nice pieces of chrome in all the places of note.
There is good use of format and divisions. Headers were extra useful.
I would like to see more submissions, the Tree, a few NPCs, linked to this location. Check out our taverns The Tired Traveler's Tavern Guide and our tavern extras Those Characters in Inns and Taverns, and other locations. Linking things is always good, as it use easier. Learning all the available linking takes time. So now worries about anything at this point.
I am looking forward to reading your next few submissions.
Now, to paraphrase the Dread Pirate Robert. Good Job. Nicely done. Bask in the glory today. Tommorow you can post something new. You write well enough that can we treat you like a native Strolenite. (This is both a compliment and a burden.) So.
I would of liked to know what the environment is like. That is one area that is too implied. There are lots of different kinds of forest out there. This is a quibble for me, not required.
The piece does leaves me with some questions however:
1) How traveled is the road to/ from/ along this place? There can't be that many adventurers going into the mountain. And if they are, are they really dropping enough coin to support the town?
So we should find out a bit more about travel to and from the town. Is it easy? Is it hard? Is this the end of the road? Inquiring minds need to know.
2) Snowflake Inn expresses that there are traders moving in and out of the area (the special goods he can get). Are these lone traders making a special trip or merchants stopping on their way elsewhere?
3) Blacksmith and leatherworkers get their raw goods from? Just need to know if it is comming in from traders, there is a local mine/ ranch, or the adventurers are bringing it back. This dictates the prices and quantity of stock.
4) ... is a small community of only a scant couple hundred , especially a scant couple of hundred. That is awkward phrasing. Clarify this please. Small in reference to a town, city, other communities in the area?
I think these questions answered would take this well towards a 5, especially for a first sub.
PS: Say, you wouldn't happen to have any talented writing friends that you would want to bring here? Go to Comment