You're right, Betsy does need a slight downsize, which I'll take care of momentarily.
As for the questions about the tourists and the national guard, (both of which have answers) like the narrator says, a bottlo o' scotch and some honey word and ye may get the answer ye seek. ;)Go to Comment
(I remember seeing a group of these things once take up residence on old Fethick's garage roof, seeing him trying to haul a law mower up there a few months later to keep the grass in check made for a good afternoons entertainment I can tell ye that much!)Go to Comment
Honey words a plenty, but no scotch? Ye sure know how ta tease a gal I tell ye!
But on ta yer questions, How do the blimpy tourists deal with Chasers?
Well if ye'd ever seen a tourist tear in ta something they thought was edible ye wouldn't be askin' that laddie!
A tourist seems ta be able ta eat just about anythin' they can fit in their fat mouths, be it a table spread o' Thanksgiving feast or the table itself, if they can get their jaws around it they can take a bite outta it.
Against Chasers they take the same approach, grab an chew; an once a pack o' chaser see four of these fatties gnaw the legs off one or two o' their brethren they look elsewhere for a late night meal.
Now yer second question, the National Guard, where are they?
Picture yourself for a moment as a the governor, or commander of a Guard Detachment, the integrity of the nation partially resting on your shoulders, and the threat of terrorist attacks by unknown forces or a natural disaster a reality you might need to deal with at any given moment.
Now picture receiving a phone call from some random civilian claiming their town is a gateway for otherworldly creatures and their dog house just got eaten by three fat women right before a bunch of beret wearin angry flamingo lawn ornaments saved them from a cave man attack.
Aye exactly, ye'd call'em a nutter and hang up, and likely ignore any future such claims from attention seeking delinquents after their four minutes of TV fame; orchestrating some big hoax that'll make you look like a grade A lummox for believing it.
Hope that answered yer questions laddie, keep 'em coming ye knowledge seekers, and I'll keep replying, as long as this bottle o' scotch holds out anyway.Go to Comment