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The Nexus
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Cheka Man's comment on 2012-06-16 01:05 PM
Only voted Go to Comment
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Mourngrymn's comment on 2012-06-10 07:59 AM
It's like a weird yet delightful xfiles meets a doctor who episode. I agree with Val that it needs a bad guy or possible group of antagonists. If a villain is added I can see this in a modern day Cthulhu if added right. Possibly even a modern era supers where a new group comes through that have similar powers of our comic book heroes. Go to Comment
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chilled's comment on 2012-06-10 07:57 AM
After reading this I now need to take a deep breath, phew!

A particularly enjoyable read, it made me feel as if I was actually there, strolling through.

5 out of 5 from me, and my first ever favourite.

I would like to take part in a game that uses this place. Go to Comment
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valadaar's comment on 2012-06-10 06:40 AM
I love the delightful madness of this place! I think it needs a villian of some type more focused then what seem to be more environmental hazards.

I enjoyed reading it and hope for more.
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Silveressa's comment on 2012-06-10 03:41 AM

You're right, Betsy does need a slight downsize, which I'll take care of momentarily.


As for the questions about the tourists and the national guard, (both of which have answers) like the narrator says, a bottlo o' scotch and some honey word and ye may get the answer ye seek. ;)

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Silveressa's comment on 2012-06-10 03:45 AM
Update: Reworked Betsy to make her less outstanding then the rest of the detail townsfolk. Go to Comment
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Silveressa's comment on 2012-06-10 03:56 AM

Not quite a bottle o' scotch but it'll do :P (update incoming!)


 


(Oh and you got some +5 comment votes coming your way when my votes refresh, love the flamingoes!) 

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Silveressa's comment on 2012-06-10 04:01 AM

(I remember seeing a group of these things once take up residence on old Fethick's garage roof, seeing him trying to haul a law mower up there a few months later to keep the grass in check made for a good afternoons entertainment I can tell ye that much!)

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Silveressa's comment on 2012-06-10 04:15 AM

Honey words a plenty, but no scotch? Ye sure know how ta tease a gal I tell ye!


But on ta yer questions, How do the blimpy tourists deal with Chasers?


Well if ye'd ever seen a tourist tear in ta something they thought was edible ye wouldn't be askin' that laddie!


A tourist seems ta be able ta eat just about anythin' they can fit in their fat mouths, be it a table spread o' Thanksgiving feast or the table itself, if they can get their jaws around it they can take a bite outta it.


Against Chasers they take the same approach, grab an chew; an once a pack o' chaser see four of these fatties gnaw the legs off one or two o' their brethren they look elsewhere for a late night meal.


 


 


Now yer second question, the National Guard, where are they?


Picture yourself for a moment as a the governor, or commander of a Guard Detachment, the integrity of the nation partially resting on your shoulders, and the threat of terrorist attacks by unknown forces or a natural disaster a reality you might need to deal with at any given moment.


Now picture receiving a phone call from some random civilian claiming their town is a gateway for otherworldly creatures and their dog house just got eaten by three fat women right before a bunch of beret wearin angry flamingo lawn ornaments saved them from a cave man attack.


Aye exactly, ye'd call'em a nutter and hang up, and likely ignore any future such claims from attention seeking delinquents after their four minutes of TV fame; orchestrating some big hoax that'll make you look like a grade A lummox for believing it.


 


Hope that answered yer questions laddie, keep 'em coming ye knowledge seekers, and I'll keep replying, as long as this bottle o' scotch holds out anyway.

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Silveressa's comment on 2012-06-10 04:23 AM
lol Indeed, and a update tis yer reward ;) Go to Comment
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Kassy's comment on 2012-06-10 02:22 PM
I think valadaar hit the nail on the head with "delightful madness".

Great sub Sil.

5/5 Go to Comment
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Kassy's comment on 2012-06-10 02:48 PM
I'd like to see a separate submission on the Overcoat Men, their ways, beliefs, the builder.

I particularly enjoyed the section on them. Go to Comment
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Kassy's comment on 2012-06-20 04:00 PM
Now I can HoH this too, such excellence deserves no less! Go to Comment
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sverigesson's comment on 2012-06-15 06:23 PM
There are a few awkward spots in this sub, but then I remember "We are being narrated to by a small town girl who has seen her share of strange things," and I realize that it works. This is equal parts silly, interesting and creepy. Way to go! Go to Comment
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Forganthus's comment on 2012-06-10 03:33 AM
I actually like this a lot. It's a small-town microcosm of weird. I don't need to know why the national guard hasn't been called in or why the townsfolk aren't more up-in-arms. This is their hometown. This is the way it is. And the idea is internally consistent.

The friendlies are very interesting (especially the Overcoat Men). The formula might be something like: serious thing + silly strange thing + strange thing. I also really like all the questions that are unanswered, and the imperfect knowledge of the narrator.

The NPCs are okay, (although Betsy stands out as a mold-breaker). And the modular idea of this piece makes it seem like a collection of separate entries, rather than a single place. How does a tourist handle a chaser, anyway? Go to Comment
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Forganthus's comment on 2012-06-10 03:51 AM
Flamingos

Flamingos arrive in flocks of 10-20 individuals. They show up in the spring months are gone as soon as summer ends.

Flamingos look almost exactly like lawn flamingos. They run around in quick, darting flocks and accost anyone they come across. They will crowd around a person and jostle against them until they are given a gift. If they are not given a gift, they may even grow hostile. Giving them food is the worst thing you can do, and causes them to fly into some sort of rage. They seem to especially enjoy hats, and may even follow you around and protect you for a short while if they are given a crisp, new fedora (for example).

Flamingos wear the gifts that they are given, whether it's a shamrock sticker, red lipstick, a chain of postcards, or a leather belt. Older flocks are often a motley assortment of knick-knacks and cheap jewelry. Once every bird in the flock has an ornament, the flock will settle down by rooting themselves in a quiet place. Oddly enough, the area around these rooted birds will grow grass, no matter where it is. Cul-de-sacs will erupt into grassy lawns in a few days if the flamingos are not chased away with loud noises. Once, they even got into the high school's gymnasium. The basketball court was filled with wildflowers by the time school started up again.

Lawn ornaments are rare in the Nexus, as the flocks of roaming flamingos will steal them and bury them. This is true even for lawn ornaments such as lawn gnomes. Flamingos seem to have an instinctive hatred for Cavemen, and will attack them on sight, perhaps because of the cavemen's habit of using lawn ornaments as weapons. Their greatest enemy is Hot Wind, which can (and has) instantly reduce a flock of flamingos to puddles of melted plastic and steaming cowboy hats. Go to Comment
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Forganthus's comment on 2012-06-10 03:52 AM
I'm changing my vote. This is just such an awesome THEME for a game. Dark, silly Americana. I haven't seen it before. 5/5. Go to Comment
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Forganthus's comment on 2012-06-10 03:55 AM
I've got the scotch. I propose that it be drank on the porch, during sunset, and while cleaning the guns. Go to Comment
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Forganthus's comment on 2012-06-10 03:56 AM
Maybe in Zombies Ate My Neighbors? Go to Comment
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Forganthus's comment on 2012-06-10 03:59 AM
It dips pretty close to honeyed words, though. Go to Comment
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