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A Summers Freeze
Plots  (Crisis)   (Side-Quest)
Pariah's comment on 2014-11-07 07:35 PM
Ah, the irrational phobia of dismembered bodies... Anyway, I want to apologize for taking so long to read this. Go to Comment
A Summers Freeze
Plots  (Crisis)   (Side-Quest)
Murometz's comment on 2014-11-07 08:14 PM


Well that's one way to tackle the Old School Quest. Write an actual "module" which is not so easy to do by the way. Kudos



It's a little clinical and dry in places I won't lie, but it seems a solid adventure with several points of interest. It could use some jazzing up, but I know, "Old School" :)



Blobs, altars, sacrifice, flesh golems and a great Maggot Mother. All seems in order there.



I think it would look pretty cool if you formatted this with some box-texts and stuff for "gm info" vs "read this to players" texts and such to make it visually resemble an actual module read-through.

Go to Comment
A Summers Freeze
Plots  (Crisis)   (Side-Quest)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-11-07 10:06 PM
Update: Added in some formatting changes as per Muro's suggestion. Go to Comment
A Summers Freeze
Plots  (Crisis)   (Side-Quest)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-11-07 10:13 PM
excellent idea, and formatted thusly Now all the read to player text is boxed, should make it easier if someone actually wanted to run this adventure. Go to Comment
A Summers Freeze
Plots  (Crisis)   (Side-Quest)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-11-19 08:30 PM
Thanks,

I appreciate you breaking down how you determined the over all rating, it's neat to see the thought process behind it. :) Go to Comment
A Summers Freeze
Plots  (Crisis)   (Side-Quest)
Aramax's comment on 2014-11-21 08:08 AM
5/5 Old School perfection! Go to Comment
A Summers Freeze
Plots  (Crisis)   (Side-Quest)
Longspeak's comment on 2014-11-19 06:50 PM
It's hard to rate subs in this Old School contest. My personal dislike of Old School tells me to rate everything low, but my rational side tells me to reward people who embrace the concepts. Let's see how I did...

Art - Full point - A good idea here, nicely presented.
Craft - Half Point - Needs some editing, but overall well-written & clear. Verbose in places, but that feels in line with my memory of modules from the old school era.
Style - Full Point - I'd ordinarily ding you here, but you're trying to be true to the old school feel. I don't like that feel, but I do appreciate how well you've hit the mark.
Substance - Full Point - Plenty here, even if I don't want to use the entire plot. I could use this is a game easily.
Extra Mile - Full Point - I thought a lot of work went into this, and you've made great efforts to color within the lines for a true old school feel. Excellent work.

While this sub doesn't hit all my buttons, I do think it's hit all the right buttons to make a great old school piece. Nice.

4.5 out of 5.0 Go to Comment
Kassy's comment on 2014-05-13 11:12 AM
The best part of Evie's story yet! Could the Nano-machine 'infection' be part of some anti-delta "vaccine"? Go to Comment
Kassy's comment on 2014-05-02 07:33 AM
5.0/5 + fav'd

I love the way the story is progressing, in a good way if you know what I mean.

Can't wait to see Evie figure out Jennifer's Delta ability, as she seems rather reluctant to reveal it herself. Go to Comment
Longspeak's comment on 2014-05-02 01:03 PM
I also can't wait to see Evie figure out Jennifer's abilities. :P Go to Comment
Silveressa's comment on 2014-04-28 06:32 PM
Aye, that it tis. Go to Comment
Kassy's comment on 2014-04-29 06:20 AM
4.5/5 + fav'd (to the now set up list)

Whilst I don't find it depressing like Longspeak, it does have a much darker note to it. It's interesting to see her transformation from Human into animal, and how that affects her, you really bring that across to the reader.

Well done. I really enjoy your writing. Go to Comment
Longspeak's comment on 2014-04-28 12:07 PM
Still depressing. Well done. But depressing.

Go to Comment
Darkness and Shadows, Part 1 of 126
Articles  (Fiction)   (Gaming - Genre)
Murometz's comment on 2014-11-13 09:53 PM
Yeah, wow. That's downright publishable I think. Go to Comment
Darkness and Shadows, Part 1 of 126
Articles  (Fiction)   (Gaming - Genre)
Kassy's comment on 2014-04-29 06:27 AM
5.0/5

Dark. Connecting. Powerful stuff Sil, you were right to put the R rating in the summary.

It's very good, hooking the reader in with the way they might identify with the character. I look forward to reading more of her story. Go to Comment
Darkness and Shadows, Part 1 of 126
Articles  (Fiction)   (Gaming - Genre)
Dakeyras's comment on 2014-04-26 10:18 AM
Only voted Go to Comment
Darkness and Shadows, Part 1 of 126
Articles  (Fiction)   (Gaming - Genre)
Gossamer's comment on 2014-10-23 09:08 AM
I didn't even know we had a fiction sub type. While this was darker than what I usually prefer, it was really gripping and sucked me in, even though it was in a bad way. =P So yeah, a 5 from me too. Go to Comment
Darkness and Shadows, Part 1 of 126
Articles  (Fiction)   (Gaming - Genre)
Tusserk's comment on 2014-11-18 03:55 AM
Tusserk the Monk likes this... do more, the monks demand it. :D Go to Comment
Silveressa's comment on 2014-04-24 08:18 PM


Compared to Sarah's background of parental death, nano infusion, being knee capped by a trusted friend, Evie's history is down right cheerful. :P (Okay maybe not the stuff that happens in Russia, but that's full of so much action you don't notice the depressing bits much.)

Go to Comment
Kassy's comment on 2014-04-24 07:22 AM
5.0/5 + fav'd (still need to make that list)

Africa, love it, and that we get to see more of Evie in her animal forms.

I wish I had more to say, but I'm feeling unable to express what it is that I feel and/or want to say.

I love your writing Sil, you're truly amazing! :) Go to Comment
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