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The Whitebone Tomes
Items  (Books and Scrolls)   (Sentient)
MysticMoon's comment on 2013-09-02 09:19 AM
Only voted Go to Comment
The Whitebone Tomes
Items  (Books and Scrolls)   (Sentient)
Gossamer's comment on 2013-07-10 05:08 AM

Very nice, I especially liked the raven book and this part; "Ahlgru made a great hullabaloo!" That made me smile. When you made your library sub I was hoping you would make the books as well.

As for typos, I really shouldn't even bother in a text that contains words like "dids't". :P
But there were two that broke the pace of the text;

whoever you touch fall alseep instantly (depending on saving rolls).

If you speak this to the doorman he will let you though, but if you try to force or trick your way in

I assume the one in the flavour poem was intentional.

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Skezemos Library
Locations  (Establishment)   (Any)
Shadoweagle's comment on 2013-06-12 05:51 AM
Like most of my subs, I start with a single idea and let it naturally expand from there. The idea I had was 'Wouldn't it be cool if there were books that were gibberish, but if you brought them together you could summon nasties!'. From there I decided i'd make it a location, because I needed that for the Occult guild. A library seemed natural for books, and then because there was demon summoning involved i figured a backstory about some secret demonologist kinda guy seemed appropriate. After that, i figured i'd better give the place itself a bit of flair, so i made the 'haunted' kind of idea. Then I figured a good way for it to be haunted was if I linked it to Skezemo's demise.
That's about how it came to be. Go to Comment
Skezemos Library
Locations  (Establishment)   (Any)
Shadoweagle's comment on 2013-06-16 08:13 PM
Update: Remade from an early draft after being lost to the void! Formatting is shot, and some content may be missing because I can't remember it all, bit the bones of it are there! Go to Comment
Skezemos Library
Locations  (Establishment)   (Any)
Mourngrymn's comment on 2013-06-12 08:48 PM
I agree with Val on this one having the PCs interact with him prior to his actions toward the end that cursed the library. Possibly a player who was seeking his help/advice/knowledge/etc on a particular matter that he said the answer was among his many tomes... then disaster struck before said help could be given. Just a thought. Gives the players a reason for wanting to get involved instead of just breaking and entering a cursed library of some deranged evil demonologist. Go to Comment
Skezemos Library
Locations  (Establishment)   (Any)
valadaar's comment on 2013-06-12 06:48 PM
I agree with Forganthus - this is very usable. In fact, you could have described the middle of the story with the PCs having interacted with Skezemo prior to this fall.

A link to 30 imps I think is in order :)


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Skezemos Library
Locations  (Establishment)   (Any)
Kassy's comment on 2013-06-12 05:35 AM
4.0/5 plus an extra +0.5 because I like Libraries, so 4.5/5

If I might ask, what inspired you to write this? Go to Comment
Skezemos Library
Locations  (Establishment)   (Any)
Moonlake's comment on 2013-06-12 07:07 PM
A good quality sub that seamlessly combines the story on Skezemo and the library itself. Go to Comment
Skezemos Library
Locations  (Establishment)   (Any)
Forganthus's comment on 2013-06-12 10:19 AM
This is well done stuff. Immediately useful and powerfully stylish. Why hasn't the city torn down this place yet? Send in some exorcists and demolition dwarves.

Maybe there's some bureaucratic hold, since some of the books aren't Skezemo's, and must be recovered, but no one wants to actually go through all the books of a cursed library one by one.

I can't think of a reason for not locking the doors, though.

Another thought: having the party all lose consciousness is definitely the scariest thing on this list. What if they woke up in different positions? Or what if they woke up and one of their members was trapped in the wall somehow? Or what if, whenever they left a book unattended, it was back on the shelf the next time they looked for it?

4.5/5 Go to Comment
Skezemos Library
Locations  (Establishment)   (Any)
Gossamer's comment on 2013-06-13 06:07 AM
Skezemo sounds a bit too jazzy for a wizard's name, but at least it's memorable.
All in all, a good sub. Go to Comment
Lazarus Lightward
NPCs  (Major)   (Religious)
Shadoweagle's comment on 2013-06-07 04:21 AM
Update: Updated some typos. Thanks Gossamer! Go to Comment
Lazarus Lightward
NPCs  (Major)   (Religious)
Shadoweagle's comment on 2013-06-07 04:23 AM
Thanks for the feedback - and that goes double since you don't read long subs, plus I know demon/devil related subs aren't really your cup of tea. Go to Comment
Lazarus Lightward
NPCs  (Major)   (Religious)
Shadoweagle's comment on 2013-06-18 11:10 AM
Update: Hooray! The delayed google Cache let me find this, and even copy over the formatting it had! Go to Comment
Lazarus Lightward
NPCs  (Major)   (Religious)
Murometz's comment on 2013-06-07 12:50 PM
A worthy Occult Guild leader! Great progression and character arc.

"One with the devil" was fun reading, with him carving symbols into his own chest to outwit the demon.

I also really like this spell... "able to cast a crimson haze in the sky which bathes the land a bloody red in a two kilometre radius. Any abilities associated with the moon or moonlight are nullified while under this haze. This includes the Lycanthrope curse."

Powerful, yet somehow subtle, and reminds me of "old sorcery." Go to Comment
Lazarus Lightward
NPCs  (Major)   (Religious)
valadaar's comment on 2013-06-09 09:23 AM
Hellpriest indeed. A very dark gray indeed, for there is reason behind his evil.

Very nicely done. Go to Comment
Lazarus Lightward
NPCs  (Major)   (Religious)
MysticMoon's comment on 2013-09-08 06:30 PM
An intriguing character with a lot of good details, like the white suit with the tiny drops of blood and wearing symbols of his old faith. Excellent work. Go to Comment
Lazarus Lightward
NPCs  (Major)   (Religious)
Gossamer's comment on 2013-06-06 11:35 AM
Phew, I usually don't read through such long subs. But this was nice, I like the added intrigue and the fact that you seamlessly connected this sub with the deadleech sub.

Typos:

I had no idea the burden of my charge back then - so young and niave

At first it was only inintelligable whispers within his mind, but they quickly grew

demon language necessary to bind his form to the priests body and soul. Go to Comment
Deadleech
Plots  (Crisis)   (Single-Storyline)
Shadoweagle's comment on 2013-06-03 12:16 AM
Update: The Deadleech was created as a severance fee for abandoning my pledge to the Divine Synod. My punishment was to bestow on the Synod a holy force which was capable of thwarting the undead. Consider the pact sealed. Consider the debt repaid. Go to Comment
Deadleech
Plots  (Crisis)   (Single-Storyline)
Cheka Man's comment on 2013-06-03 09:28 AM
A good zombie killer. Or as a torture device for a bound Greater Undead. Go to Comment
Deadleech
Plots  (Crisis)   (Single-Storyline)
valadaar's comment on 2013-06-04 09:01 PM
Great payment for your crime. A great submission. I have an appreciation for enchanted invertebrates :)
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