It feels a little under-developed, but it's basically solid. A false eye with the essence of a god implanted in it becomes a pale reflection of the eye of that god, especially since it must be a small, and thus 'weak' shard - But what inspires a person to put a sword-tip in an eye? Go to Comment
Bleh. Underdeveloped is right. I think I might've thought of this about 1130 to 12 at night, and typed it up then. No notes on this sucker anywhere, which means it got developed for a total of 10, maybe 15 seconds. Okay, I'm guessing that it would be because he could feel the power emenating off of it, figured out the it was a piece of one of Her swords, and figured that this would help his brother, maybe even allow him to 'see' out of the glass eye. Go to Comment
I love the name! Eye of the Pig invokes horror/terror, before you even begin reading it. I wish the details were a bit expanded on as others have mentioned. Also, I realize and understand that this is part of the Shards of the Storm Quest, but I feel that if it was a stand alone item, and its powers were radically different, leaning towards something more sinister, this would have been AWESOME! Go to Comment
FUN.
I can't wait to do something like this to my heroes. They'll be real happy when their flintlocks and crossbows get sopping wet from being flung into the mud. In fact, I don't even know if they'll be able to escape. Go to Comment
If such punishment as this prison system is common enough to be accepted by the peasantry and middleclass of a kingdom, it is likely that this land will be rife with power hungry corruption at the top of the systems structure. Informants might be pretty common as well, "better them than you." A criminal might rat out just anyone to not be caged in that bog.
I like this. A lot.
It's easy to adapt to a special setting or world. A good base for adding details.
Okay, Zy. a bog is not nessacarily warm in winter. This would be further north if you're going to be getting at the -5 at midday. A bog would only be a 'bog' about half the year then. In the winter you'd have frost going down into the ground a good ways, and probably permafrost a bit deeper. On the digging during summer, when it is wet and soggy. You ever try to dig a hole in a lake bottom? The water will fill it in, and a bog is a lot of standing water. The farthest down you could probably dig before you hit the water level would be 6 in. Then your pulling more water out of the hole than substrate.
Ill work on the penal system and pos it. As well as fix stuff to this sucker. Go to Comment
Who is in charge of administering this justice? Who does sentencing, who guards people while they build their own prison? Can people not dig out? (If my choices were try to dig out of earth or stand still in swamp I know which I would choose. And by nature a swamp should be easy to dig through. And the worst that could happen is you die trying... oh well!) Why is it so cold in winter? Swamps are usually pretty warm, and especially buried in a bioactive pit it should be quite 'comfortable', if wet, in winter unless there is a special weather system. I like the general idea, but wish it were fleshed out more. Go to Comment
Here's an oubliette if I ever saw one. I actually LOVE this P! A somewhat mundane, but morbid addition to any world! Love the feel of cold, misty bog prisons!
Creepy good. I always tend to find enchanted/cursed chess sets appealing for some reason. I like the way that it has to be stolen, and that violence must ensue. Couple of questions. I understand that if the chess set is given away or sold, things get worse for the poor sap. Does this also apply to their afterlife, as well? As in, they might die in a mad house, but do they have a shot at heaven? And does the curse affect whoever it was given or sold to? Also, if someone is hired to steal this on behalf of another party, does the curse treat the thief or the employer as the owner? Go to Comment
I have seen this idea bounced around in fiction a great deal. (The Seventh, most recently). I still like it. I am sure there are many variations we could have.
Now, if Pariah would spell check and put in extra returns between paragraphs, I would of given him a 4.5 Go to Comment
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