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The Three Cities of Dusk, Dawn, and Luna
Locations  (City)   (Mountains)
Murometz's comment on 2011-04-13 10:57 PM


Reminiscent of Tanelorn for some reason (in a good way)! I'm going to use this as a legend in an upcoming campaign. The Three Ghost Cities. Except I'm renaming them Dawn, Dusk, and Noon (Ha! You thought I'd say Midnight).



Anyway, the idea piques (is that a word?) the imagination, but I wish to know more. More! Especially the esoteric bits.



As is, great stub or in-work, on its way to more.

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The Three Cities of Dusk, Dawn, and Luna
Locations  (City)   (Mountains)
valadaar's comment on 2013-11-22 12:53 PM
My comments are the same as Strolen's. Good job! Go to Comment
The Three Cities of Dusk, Dawn, and Luna
Locations  (City)   (Mountains)
MysticMoon's comment on 2011-04-16 06:56 PM
I didn't actually want to write this one but it kept pestering me while I was working on The Lost Imperial City. I finally promised that I would at least do a short writeup if it would leave me alone until I was finished. So, I'm not really sure where to go with it. Any ideas are welcome.

I'm not familiar with Tanelorn. I was inspired by Ultima III (oh, maybe just a few years ago...) Go to Comment
The Lost Imperial City
Dungeons  (Plains)   (Rooms/ Halls)
Pieh's comment on 2011-04-25 02:51 AM


Very interesting follow-up post. I can totally understand the struggles of pushing out an adventure and the want to just be done with it, but I still have to agree with Scras that it falls a little short of the original. I guess it feels a little too hopeless at times (such as the snakes) and too ... Can't think of a word for it, but the problem being that it relies of NPCs surviving, and ones that don't have a very good chance of it at that, to complete the adventure. All of the information to be gained is presented in NPC-reliant format, with Godfrey's visions, then the wizard's knowledge that they won't pass on. I wouldn't want to be a player in this adventure, as I would feel lacking compared to the NPCs.


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The Lost Imperial City
Dungeons  (Plains)   (Rooms/ Halls)
Scrasamax's comment on 2011-04-16 04:52 PM


Interesting, but somehow it falls short of its companion submission. Still, well done.


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The Lost Imperial City
Dungeons  (Plains)   (Rooms/ Halls)
Michael Jotne Slayer's comment on 2011-04-12 12:03 PM


Really good indeed. I love your atmospheric descriptions, I love the 5 room set-up(have never attempted it myself though) and I enjoyed the plot. 



Good job MysticMoon!


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The Lost Imperial City
Dungeons  (Plains)   (Rooms/ Halls)
valadaar's comment on 2011-04-11 07:56 PM


Really good - it seems to have been overlooked somehow.

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The Lost Imperial City
Dungeons  (Plains)   (Rooms/ Halls)
Old Dreamer's comment on 2011-03-29 07:17 PM


Excellent follow up to the original post! If I had votes left, I'd give you a 5/5!


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The Lost Imperial City
Dungeons  (Plains)   (Rooms/ Halls)
Dossta's comment on 2011-04-26 10:59 AM


I enjoyed this adventure, and can appreciate the work that went into the atmospheric descriptions.  It nicely complements your other quest submission.  I will, however, agree with Pieh about the hopelessness for the PCs at certain parts.  The snakes, especially, are a difficult conundrum, and I would probably omit them if I were going to run this.


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The Lost Imperial City
Dungeons  (Plains)   (Rooms/ Halls)
MysticMoon's comment on 2011-03-29 07:48 PM
Thanks. I appreciate the feedback. Go to Comment
The Lost Imperial City
Dungeons  (Plains)   (Rooms/ Halls)
MysticMoon's comment on 2011-04-16 07:26 PM
Is there anything specific you feel could be improved upon? I really struggled with this one and only posted it when I felt I'd done as well as I could (plus I could barely stand to look at the thing by then.)

Adventure design is not one of my strengths and I'm open to any feedback that could help me to improve. Go to Comment
The Lost Imperial City
Dungeons  (Plains)   (Rooms/ Halls)
MysticMoon's comment on 2011-04-25 10:04 AM
Some good food for thought. I will go back through this from the perspective of the PCs and see if I can make improvements. Go to Comment
The Lost Empire
Locations  (World)   (Any)
Pieh's comment on 2011-04-25 02:32 AM


An excellent submission, I echo the praise of the others. I don't really have any questions after reading this. It seems like any of the pocket realms would be easy enough to devise of your own, but I do look forward to reading more of this setting.


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The Lost Empire
Locations  (World)   (Any)
Scrasamax's comment on 2011-04-16 04:51 PM


Only Voted


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The Lost Empire
Locations  (World)   (Any)
EchoMirage's comment on 2011-03-24 05:09 AM


This one's good. Echo likes.



You might want to flesh out the plot hooks a little.


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The Lost Empire
Locations  (World)   (Any)
Cheka Man's comment on 2011-03-23 11:34 PM


Thank you. Those wizards have certainly suffered for their greed. Maybe I should make a 30 Pocket Realms submission.


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The Lost Empire
Locations  (World)   (Any)
Mourngrymn's comment on 2011-03-24 11:13 AM


Oddly enough I read this two days ago and seemed to not have voted or commented on it at all. I like it, the backstory is quirky and detailed enough from a single perspective it reminds me of why I love backstory. Even though it might not be a story that the players will ever find out it is still a much needed bit of context to any sub I think. Kudos to you.


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The Lost Empire
Locations  (World)   (Any)
Mourngrymn's comment on 2011-03-25 01:02 AM
That would be a great addon to this... tie it all together in a huge back story and actual working dungeon. Go to Comment
The Lost Empire
Locations  (World)   (Any)
Old Dreamer's comment on 2011-03-24 10:29 PM


Interesting. Liked the idea of the Tower creation leading to the city's end and the quest  by the Wizard-Lichs to free their torment.



Question though, would this mean that there are towers in every pocketworld? In my mind the tower(s) act as gates from one world/dimension to another.  As I followed the plot I expected the characters to end up at one of these towers, not a hill. Or, is the tallest hill that dimensions version of the tower?


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The Lost Empire
Locations  (World)   (Any)
Dossta's comment on 2011-04-26 10:44 AM


Pretty much everything has been said already; it's an interesting premise and a solid submission.  I especially liked the writing for the internal dialogs of each character, because they really make it come alive.  I actually feel bad for the wizards, though my normal inclination would be to dismiss them entirely as arrogant fools.  Well done!


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