As a matter of fact, the Maoist Communist who terrorised large swathes of the world during the Cold War, were actually the inspiration for this NPC. I wanted to channel revolutionaries who weren't stereotypical ''good guys'', so to speak. Go to Comment
Would you like me to add those details? I could expand the Roleplaying notes section quite a bit if you think that doing that would result in a more well-rounded NPC. Go to Comment
Not bad, it was a long read that drug on in a few places, and some of the scenes seemed a bit gratuitous. I don't mean that the rape, immolation of a baby, and beheading of a baron was excessive, that is the sort of thing that people do, I just dont know that it provided anything more than some shock value. Charles is a well developed revolutionary/infiltraitor, but aside from that and his bloody past there is not actually that much we know about the man. Aside from his obvious fanaticism, and killer's ethos, he is somewhat one-sided. I would like to see behind the facade and know, what does he like to do besides killing, plotting assassination, and if he has no friends among the other guards, does he have any friends at all? does he socialize any? Drink? Wench? These are just some questions that I pondered when I was reading this submission. Go to Comment
This sub is a consistent piece, well-written and usable.
I can see the picture, with Charles standing triumphant over a dead monarch's body, calling out to all the oppressed, say, during a grand festival, to kill their masters... the paranoia, violence, and change that occurs. Go to Comment
My opinions of this is somewhere in between Echo and Scras. I would like have some more landmarks to follow. My major brownie point for this one is that it's quite usable. Go to Comment
A very nice history for this character. It is well written with lots of details about his youth and the trials of growing up. The single minded fanatacism to bring about equality among everyone is like Cheka Man says, a true communist. 5/5 Go to Comment
The Ragori Lifeforms (Intelligent Species)
(Swamp)
They could stand some editing - there are some contradictions in the writeup, such as the role of the female being unclear; as it is written it means all women would be shamen - which would make little sense.
I do like their communication, though.
It needs to be smoothed out still, spelling and content. Go to Comment
The Ragori Lifeforms (Intelligent Species)
(Swamp)
I was trying to figure out as i was reading whether these were crocodilian lizard-men, or something else entirely, but then finally settled on them being eel-men, yes? Sugada being the clincher.
I like these folk, its a ready-made, detail-oriented swamp race, and i love anything tha lives in a swamp. My favorite terrain for adventure! Physiology (nice touch on the tentacles and egg-sex variances) and 'dwellings' (banyan tree, panels to Sugada, etc...) were hi-lites for me.
That's true, now that you mention it. I guess that as long as he has the good sense to stay away from the transcendants, he would have a very fulfilling career as the personal chef of some noble who would allow him to butcher and cook pretty much anything he wanted. And on the subject of Rephatia, have I ever mentioned that it's easily the most disturbing fictional culture that I've ever had the pleasure of reading about? Go to Comment
Val, I imagine that Jimmy would be thrilled to find himself in the country of the Rephatians where there would be so many different varities of humanoids for him to cook and feast on. However, if he allowed temptation to get the better of him and tried to murder and eat a member of the soldier or elite caste, I have no doubt that he would meet with a swift and savage end. Go to Comment
Bizarre yet believable. As a wannabe gourmet, i can appreciate Jimmy's tastes and curiousities. Remember, taboos aside, human flesh tastes remarkably like pork. Heck, even cat testicle stew is not all that unbelievable. Testicles of bulls, sheep, etc are considered delicacies in many countries. Jimmy is kind of a Sweeney Todd of the kitchens, without the revenge angle. I kind of like the fact that Jimmy seems aware and yet ignorant of his own brand of evil.
I'm a big fan of the MEAT LOVING KNIFE (include a link!!) Nice way to use it with an NPC.
Also, fix up this sentence.....Born with highly sensitive taste bus, he could perceive the differences that existed bet wend different types of meat
Oh, and why would he get rid of offal? A man like Jimmy Stout can certainly appreciate some sweet meats, livers, kidneys, hearts... Go to Comment
Lifeforms (Unique) (Water)
Very well written and thought out!
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