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Unknown XX
Locations  (World)   (Space)
Maggot's comment on 2007-06-19 08:13 AM
I apologise for the lack of bold headings. It seems that whenever I try to highlight a few words in bold or italics, the entire text turns out that way as well. And as Muro observed, I do not own a reliable spell-checker either, meaning that my editing resources at this point are somewhat limited and rudimentary.

As for the odd name, it was meant to highlight the planet's seeming irrelevance. yes,xx is most commonly employed as a place-holder. This is an entity so unworthy of humanity's attention, that it has not even been given a real name.

I should probably have taken more time over this submission, but my schedule is so tight that I had less than a day to get the whole thing together. Again, my apologies for making this such a trying read. Go to Comment
Unknown XX
Locations  (World)   (Space)
Scrasamax's comment on 2007-06-18 11:59 AM
While the idea of the planet eater isn't new (Unicron, Galactus come to mind) it is the execution and imagry that make this submission shine. Of course it requires the core concept of living planets, and by extension other celestial bodies being alive. Though the bit about waning celestials expending their lives in a blaze of fire and glory before craching into her was a lovely image.

On the other hand there are some really bad typos in this submission and It feels like it was rushed. I would recommend running the spell check and possibly breaking up the text with some bolded headers and turning some of the example dialogs into italic text. Go to Comment
Unknown XX
Locations  (World)   (Space)
Cheka Man's comment on 2007-06-18 11:13 AM
Poor thing, a vampire planet. Go to Comment
Unknown XX
Locations  (World)   (Space)
Chaosmark's comment on 2008-11-20 04:18 PM
Trying read or not, this was a very nicely done submission. Indeed, planet eaters aren't entirely new, but they're not often done either, so this holds the distinction of being very, very unique. Go to Comment
Unknown XX
Locations  (World)   (Space)
Murometz's comment on 2007-06-18 04:03 PM
holy cow! yeah, the imagery and the details elevate this from being one of Galactus' relatives :)

basically, what Scras said! Great work, Maggot!

Hmm, you dont have access to a Spell Checker, do you? All your subs, even the great ones, seem to have that slight "un-edited" feel.

Anyhoo, memorable planet! Go to Comment
Unknown XX
Locations  (World)   (Space)
valadaar's comment on 2007-06-18 05:10 PM
Nothing to add to what has been said other then to say Great Job! Go to Comment
The Pan-Kor
Society/ Organizations  (Ethnic/Cultural)   (Regional)
manfred's comment on 2007-05-20 03:08 PM
Not bad. Well written. At some point, though, I was lost in the coolness and power and seacraft. A little re-reading would be also in place, but that can be expected at a text this size.

One idea: it is known that freshly born babies can swim, loosing this ability later after birth (several months, I think). What if the Pan-Kor never loose this potential, and are their whole lives natural swimmers? Among other things, it would make for an interesting child-rearing, with toddlers that can't walk, but can well swim away. (So don't let them out on the sea!) Go to Comment
The Pan-Kor
Society/ Organizations  (Ethnic/Cultural)   (Regional)
manfred's comment on 2007-05-21 01:48 PM
Glad to be of service.

(Are you sure you are closing the tags correctly? There seems to be a little mess inside. You might want to remove them all, and start anew. If you want to, I can help out with the removal. ;) ) Go to Comment
The Pan-Kor
Society/ Organizations  (Ethnic/Cultural)   (Regional)
manfred's comment on 2007-05-22 02:43 PM
Man, you've just about beat me! At least I've removed the obsolete tags that remained. :) Go to Comment
The Pan-Kor
Society/ Organizations  (Ethnic/Cultural)   (Regional)
manfred's comment on 2007-05-27 02:00 PM
(Are you sure you close the tags correctly? I have seen several opening tags in the text, the closing ones only on the end, likely added by the parser.) Go to Comment
The Pan-Kor
Society/ Organizations  (Ethnic/Cultural)   (Regional)
Maggot's comment on 2007-05-21 09:08 AM
I'm not sure what's up with that. I kept removing the bold tags each time I edited it, but they kept coming back for some reason..

By the way manfred, thanks for that nifty little idea. I've added that in, seeing as how it would be a must for a people as aquatic as the Pan-Kor. Go to Comment
The Pan-Kor
Society/ Organizations  (Ethnic/Cultural)   (Regional)
Maggot's comment on 2007-05-22 07:37 AM
Ahh,yes, some help would be greatly appreciated. :)Thank you for offering! Go to Comment
The Pan-Kor
Society/ Organizations  (Ethnic/Cultural)   (Regional)
Maggot's comment on 2007-05-27 03:08 AM
It was my intention to have simply enclosed the preceding creation myth in italics, not the entire text. Every time I try to enclose a certain portion with bold or italics tags, it's the whole thing that gets affected for some reason. Go to Comment
The Pan-Kor
Society/ Organizations  (Ethnic/Cultural)   (Regional)
Scrasamax's comment on 2007-05-20 09:17 AM
You might need to check your tags, Bold is out of control! Go to Comment
The Pan-Kor
Society/ Organizations  (Ethnic/Cultural)   (Regional)
Cheka Man's comment on 2007-05-20 12:47 PM
This was well worth waiting for. 5/5 Go to Comment
The Pan-Kor
Society/ Organizations  (Ethnic/Cultural)   (Regional)
Murometz's comment on 2007-05-22 02:20 PM
bolding fixed. Now I just have to figure out where you want italics and where you dont :) Go to Comment
The Pan-Kor
Society/ Organizations  (Ethnic/Cultural)   (Regional)
Murometz's comment on 2007-05-22 02:48 PM
woot. the obsolete tags were the exact things that confused me, as I was trying to edit this juggernaut :D Go to Comment
Hounds Of War
Lifeforms  (Fauna)   (Any)
Maggot's comment on 2007-04-01 07:17 AM
Ahh, that is good advice. Go to Comment
Hounds Of War
Lifeforms  (Fauna)   (Any)
Cheka Man's comment on 2007-03-30 01:20 PM
Only voted Go to Comment
Hounds Of War
Lifeforms  (Fauna)   (Any)
Ancient Gamer's comment on 2007-04-02 05:39 PM
Use headings too Maggot! I recommend it for subs of this size! Go to Comment
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