Can't say I like it. Sketchy, not too well described (how can they have organs like humans when they are an invertebrate tentacled ball?). No description of culture, social order, tech...
This needs a lot of work on your part. Go to Comment
Interesting, interesting. It has a lot of potential, and I like the bizarre description of the creatures themselves and their justifications for their actions. However, it reads very awkwardly and some parts are confusing. Also, why do they call themselves the "Dark Crusaders"? Do they culturally associate darkness with good or law or whatever? Go to Comment
Well, pretty much what Cap said. There are some very interesting concepts in here and I like the format you used, but yes, some parts are somwehat confusing. Go to Comment
To me, not so much haunting, but definitely bizarre! (in a good way)
The Keerg are a pretty fascinating species. Lots of interesting details. I think maybe you could have shortened this a bit. While the 2 seperate primers, one for fantasy and one for guns/ships game is kinda cool, from an aesthetic standpoint, I'd squeeze that into a more general primer, allowing people to populate their distinctive worlds with these beings, by adapting them as they see fit.
After rereading this though, I do find that I like it better the second time around. Lots of good work put in here. Good job, hrofgar.
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Lifeforms (Intelligent Species) (Space)
This needs a lot of work on your part. Go to Comment