As a sub, this is a high quality and comprehensive one. However, as a character write-up, it seems to be somewhat lacking. Same as Forganthus, I'm currently seeing him as just another scholarly/wizardly character with an obsession and nothing much to set him apart from others belonging to this category (although, the fact that his life depends on this obsession of his is a far more credible reason for his obsession than him just having an obsession fullstop as often happen with other characters of this genre and I do like this bit of background that you put in) Go to Comment
Solid, well-written, and immediately usable. You can plop him down anywhere you want. I had to go back to another article to read about kheliaa, though, so it'd be nice if a sentence explaining kheliaa were inserted here, as well. I'm left wondering wondering about his history/character, of it he's just another greybeard wizard type researching an obsession.
And I really like the idea of his signs in the woods. The PCs could stumble across his signs long before they ever meet him. Go to Comment
Very, very thorough. I liked Pfloem's secret affliction, and appreciated the detailed description of his home and defenses. I wouldn't intend for him to be a combat encounter, but it's always good to have this stuff in advance (since PCs have a tendency to escalate things quickly).
In particular, I can imagine the party rogue trying to infiltrate the Master's study and becoming infected with Kheliaa. Then the Master has a great bargaining chip to use with the party later. Besides retrieving interesting mushrooms for him, do you think there is anything that the party could be asked to do for Pfloem, in exchange for a cure or a way to stop the Kheliaa from spreading? Go to Comment
An intriguing sub that blends in the 2 unrelated subs seamlessly. Good work on that part as usual. However, I need more time to think abt actual score to give- currently, I can't even pinpoint a score range (usually, I would give an indication that I'm torn b/w a score of x versus y). Maybe just a 'late at night" effect. Go to Comment
Well, yes, no actual 'blending' but then I would imagine it is very hard to blend these particular two together. The other possibility I could think of was maybe a story abt a particular flesh peddler's discovery of sth that could spark a change in magic/tech paradigm and how she dealt with it. What I meant by blend in the previous comment was just in more generic terms incorporate the 2 subs into a sub and not having it sound forced (which in the technical sense, is a bit 'inferior' to true blending but I still sound it a sound achievement). In this respect, I think this particular sub is successful. Go to Comment
Okay, vote decided. This sub is a notch below your usual standard and would be a 3 in my personal opinion. As previously mentioned, it does a good job of incorporating the 2 previous subs w/o making the link seem forced but does not really add value as your previous subs. However, considering the difficulty involved (and I'm not playing nice this time, it is part of my revised voting practice to take into account the difficulty involved in any Challenge subs eg. Oekaki, sth like this), bonus 0.5 points. So 3.5 it is. Go to Comment
I rather liked the world you set up in the beginning, and the implications later for the normal/paranormal matchmaking. Kinda had a muggle/non-muggle vibe to it, and it implies another coming paradigm shift within your setting. Perhaps Sigh inc. is opening the way for a specialized breeding program (or a possible eugenics phase, if you want to go darker).
The only point that confused me is that you specifically said that every human has the inner potential to use magic. Is "paranormal" just a word to describe someone who has gained some success harnessing this power, while "normal" is one who is having trouble? Go to Comment
Only changes the colour. The hair (or beard) may seem less greasy as it eats the fat but if you don't care about that enough you'll never know you have it until you look in a mirror. Or someone comments on your bright purple hairdo of course... Go to Comment
In this culture it is not wise to talk too much good things about anything - especially children,lest some evil spirit steals it. So it is customary to say it is ugly and weak and will surely not survive. Also:
"The man who boasts of his young woman is a fool,
The man who boasts of his wares will get rich."