It's absolutely evocative prose, and were I to read it in a fiction work, it'd fit magnificently. It's just a bit much for the exigencies of a tabletop gaming campaign, where the amount of storytelling and flavor text with which you can batter the players is limited. There's a lot a GM has to invent here: what are the powers of the Tree? Is it a deity in of itself, a servitor/avatar of one, or simply an uber-Undead? Is there a nation near to hand or claiming this territory? What are these minions the Emperor has? Who are the cultists that serve/oppose him? I'd be happy to see more of these particulars fleshed out.
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The flavor text doesn't say, and I'd wager the average player would raise eyebrows at several pages worth of it that boiled down to "Evil last emperor of destroyed empire / nasty undead tree / and here's the location."
Wow in depth, with enough info to base an entire campaign around. It's nice to see an unusual enemy that has a fresh approach to achieving their goals, and really make players struggle to get a grasp on their capability and motivations.
A couple quick ideas to improve the appearance/presentation:
Putting the headers such as appearance, confrontation etc.. in bold would help a bit to highlight the different sections of the article and make it easier to find a particular area when skimming during a game session.
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Also, putting a line break in between each plot hook and bolding their titles would make the last text area a bit easier to read/navigate. (as it is it's a bit of a wall of text towards the end)
There are so many aspects of this sub that I like. Being a big fan of mythology, I love the description on how the Reverie came to be. I like the idea of the Reverie being a shared reality and it gets my mind thinking of all the ways that it would influence Elven society. The progression of Vlari-Shion's story is riveting. The language is wonderfully evocative. Truly a different take on monsters and it would have worked well for the quest.
I have racked my brain to come up with something that could use improvement, but I got nothin'.
Excellent sub! It was a little confusing in places - I didn't realize at first that the sub was written from an opposing viewpoint, for instance - but it is full of ideas that could be taken and used even if the whole sub was not used in the campaign. I like it!
Very cool. I liked a lot of the descriptions of the victims and original demon. However, the form of floating body parts was fitting, just not satisfying. I feel like this could benefit from more detail. I want more of this. It's very good, but leaves me begging for more.