Strolen\s Citadel content. 
The Crowns of Glory
Items  (Jewelry)   (Campaign Defining)
Dossta's comment on 2012-12-06 01:03 PM
The whole concept is brilliant, and can be approached from so many different angles. I think that the story of the original crown -- the mad king and his descendants -- should probably be left as part of the world history, just because it's so vast in scope. So in answer . . . I would like to read a series in which these crowns are coming back into play, and the heroes have to deal with the aftermath. Will they hide the crowns, destroy them, or try to claim them for "the greater good"? Seriously, please write this book! Go to Comment
The Crowns of Glory
Items  (Jewelry)   (Campaign Defining)
Dossta's comment on 2012-12-06 01:08 PM

Plot Hook -- Campaign Starter:

Everyone in the party has been forced to give up a part of their power to one of the Crowned.  Perhaps the evil king has been "recruiting" recently, and the PCs were just in the wrong place at the wrong time.  Not only do the players potentially lose something vital from their character sheets, their characters' health and vitality may also be continually sapped as they adventure.  Will they be able to bring the bastard down with a key part of their abilities missing?  Or will their biological clocks run out first?

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The Crowns of Glory
Items  (Jewelry)   (Campaign Defining)
MysticMoon's comment on 2011-04-17 05:11 AM


Most excellent and an enthralling read. 5/5


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The Tree of Bone
Lifeforms  (Unique)   (Mountains)
Pieh's comment on 2011-04-24 05:13 AM


I like a lot about this submission, particularly that it was such a captivating read. Though I'm not quite sure how I would use it. It feels like it should be a focal point for a campaign, as the BBEG, but there isn't a whole lot to support a long running game (long enough to become strong enough to "defeat" the tree). It feels like you've given us enough for an encounter with the tree, but not enough to really use it.



I also think I am confused on one part: Some sections seem to imply that the tree would only call and accept females of a particular bloodline, while other parts make it sound like an epidemic of dead rising and journeying to the tree. I'm not sure how it could possibly take more than a few days to take in all of the women, or how you could fail to mention a plot hook involving undead rising and going on a pilgrimage, if that was the case.



I like it, but the style in which it is pieced together is confusing and seemingly not conductive to providing accurate information on using the submission.


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The Tree of Bone
Lifeforms  (Unique)   (Mountains)
EchoMirage's comment on 2011-03-15 01:53 AM
Yeah, the "ewww" was sort of intended. A success, then! Go to Comment
The Tree of Bone
Lifeforms  (Unique)   (Mountains)
EchoMirage's comment on 2011-04-12 03:12 AM
I do not think the Emperor is evil, actually. He is alien - and knows little of human morals, perchance can't even understand them.
Whether his love for his wives/people was honest, I leave up to the reader, but in my opinion it was.

As for the "power level" it is an undead god. Undead Old One. Starspawn. Clad in corpses. He has collected them for at least a thousand years. It's going to be huge. It's not something to be brought down through swinging a sword at it, but through role-play and smarts.

His location was described to be in the middle of a barely inhabitable mountain chain, as unclaimed. Sure, it will be inside the territory of one of the mentioned realms, Aberlia or New Ebernesse - at least on maps. But a fantasy kingdom has usually better things to conquer that an inhospitable mountaintop where you need a dwarven apparatus to breathe.

As for the minions and powers, I'll add a paragraph. Go to Comment
The Tree of Bone
Lifeforms  (Unique)   (Mountains)
EchoMirage's comment on 2011-04-18 02:14 PM


The minions of the Tree



Who keeps the dead god-emperor company besides his deceased children? It is the men of Valersund, forever bent by his sorcery, their flesh sustained by his will and their minds sundered by his presence.



They are hulking creatures, with exaggerated muscles bordering on the grotesque, and elongated arms ending often in rending claws. Some possess more than two, with extra appendages of murderous intent growing from their hunched backs, now useless mouths or as tails.



Though hideously deformed, they still are less horrid than their larger brethren, who consist of several fused bodies, walking on six legs and wielding weapons in all directions, or the jumbled amalgams of man and beast.



Each will also have a female face growing somewhere, disturbingly beautiful amidst his misshapen features; it is the face of the female who once commanded him, and forever it whispers to him the will of the god-emperor. The link, though, can be severed with magic or a weapon capable of harming ghosts, leading to confusion on the beast's part.



They are clad in remnants of armor, often of excellent make, and wrapped in shreds of dead flesh, skin and bone of those who sought to desecrate the Emperor's resting place. All over their skin, a strange slimy membrane is spread, exuded by the dead deity, to allow them to exist in the cold and thin air of the mountain summit, keeping them forever just beyond the grasp of death.



For weapons, the Servant Sons use their monstrous bodies, or man-made weapons, some of them even objects of power.



Most are hopelessly insane, driven but by the dead god-thing's will, though a select few embraced their monarch's influence and gave themselves to it, keeping reasoning and cunning largely intact, and their madness subtle.


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The Tree of Bone
Lifeforms  (Unique)   (Mountains)
Cheka Man's comment on 2011-03-14 05:25 PM


Interesting, but a bit ewww.


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The Tree of Bone
Lifeforms  (Unique)   (Mountains)
Cheka Man's comment on 2011-03-15 04:41 PM


With an HOH waiting for it.


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The Tree of Bone
Lifeforms  (Unique)   (Mountains)
Mourngrymn's comment on 2011-03-24 09:51 AM
The Tree of Bone
Lifeforms  (Unique)   (Mountains)
valadaar's comment on 2011-03-18 06:08 PM


An excellent addition to the quest - nicely done EM!


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The Tree of Bone
Lifeforms  (Unique)   (Mountains)
Aramax's comment on 2014-10-13 11:39 AM
Very nice, a tad on the wordy side for me,but just a tad.I'm a sucker for anything vagoely Lovcraftian. For me right between a 5 and an HOH, so solid 5/5 Go to Comment
The Tree of Bone
Lifeforms  (Unique)   (Mountains)
sverigesson's comment on 2011-03-15 08:27 PM
This is one of the best submissions in quite a while, I think. Great blend of epic and creepy. Go to Comment
The Tree of Bone
Lifeforms  (Unique)   (Mountains)
RGTraynor's comment on 2011-04-02 04:47 AM


It's absolutely evocative prose, and were I to read it in a fiction work, it'd fit magnificently.  It's just a bit much for the exigencies of a tabletop gaming campaign, where the amount of storytelling and flavor text with which you can batter the players is limited.  There's a lot a GM has to invent here: what are the powers of the Tree?  Is it a deity in of itself, a servitor/avatar of one, or simply an uber-Undead?  Is there a nation near to hand or claiming this territory?  What are these minions the Emperor has?  Who are the cultists that serve/oppose him? I'd be happy to see more of these particulars fleshed out. 



The flavor text doesn't say, and I'd wager the average player would raise eyebrows at several pages worth of it that boiled down to "Evil last emperor of destroyed empire / nasty undead tree / and here's the location."

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The Tree of Bone
Lifeforms  (Unique)   (Mountains)
MysticMoon's comment on 2011-03-15 08:30 PM


"ewww", yes.



I am in awe of the quality of the prose. A whole lot more showing than telling, for sure.

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The Tree of Bone
Lifeforms  (Unique)   (Mountains)
caesar193's comment on 2012-12-14 09:42 PM
I love this thing. An undead tree made of thousands of corpses because of a fallen emperor's love? You sir get a HoH. And the caesar193 seal of approval. Go to Comment
The Keeper of Dark Dreaming
NPCs  (Campaign)   (Mystical)
Strolen's comment on 2011-02-27 05:00 AM
Update: Update Freetext Go to Comment
The Keeper of Dark Dreaming
NPCs  (Campaign)   (Mystical)
EchoMirage's comment on 2011-01-01 03:18 PM


Hm, intended this for the last quest, but did not post it in time.

 


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The Keeper of Dark Dreaming
NPCs  (Campaign)   (Mystical)
valadaar's comment on 2013-04-24 12:55 PM
Wow, EM, this is really damn good. The visuals of the hair and stuff extending as vast extraplanar tendrils is just awesome. Go to Comment
The Keeper of Dark Dreaming
NPCs  (Campaign)   (Mystical)
Silveressa's comment on 2011-01-13 11:09 AM


Wow in depth, with enough info to base an entire campaign around. It's nice to see an unusual enemy that has a fresh approach to achieving their goals, and really make players struggle to get a grasp on their capability and motivations.



A couple quick ideas to improve the appearance/presentation:



Putting the headers such as appearance, confrontation etc.. in bold would help a bit  to highlight the different sections of the article and make it easier to find a particular area when skimming during a game session.



Also, putting a line break in between each plot hook and bolding their titles would make the last text area a bit easier to read/navigate. (as it is it's a bit of a wall of text towards the end)

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