In response to the repeated acts of sabotage against the Computer's Utopic society, there was a requirement for better means to ferret out the despicable Commie Mutant Traitors. This finely crafted multi-purpose helmet was designed to allow troubleshooters to more easily pick out these insects and deliver the Computer's justice.
The helmet is the rodent's posterior of todays fashion, being a gleaming cone 23.73cm in height. It is painted a stylish paisley and topped with a gleaming white eyeball crafted from the finest white plastisteel. Ergometric studies have settled on an optimal size that will comfortably fit any and all troubleshooters. Substantial savings have been incurred by omitting any capability of adjusting its fit, and any required adjustments are highly unlikely.
The helmet allows the wearer to see through the top-placed eyeball which continually rotates while activated. This will induce motion sickness for all but the strongest wearers
Any persons spotted will be surrounded by a pink aura indicating that they are CMT's.
To prevent it's unauthorized use by any Commie Mutant Traitors, various defences are built into the helment, including the Autotrepanator, HCL Dispensor, and the mechanical Imploder.
Authors note: In the Paranoia game, ALL pcs were Commie Mutant Traitors..... So it is quite effective at finding them...Go to Comment
This huge, wide-brimmed felt hat is fantastically decorated with intricate, multicolored patterns. Small crystalline jewels hang from the brim of the hat and when they catch the sunlight send rainbow light on the floor.
Apart from its fantastic appearance, the hat also keeps the area beneath its brim comfortable regardless of natural weather. Snow and rain, even driven by hurricane force will not enter the sanctuary under the hat.It will not stop thrown objects, prevent lifting by a tornado, or any volcanic phenomena.
The Spiffy Sorcerer’s Stovepipe of Serpent Summoning
First devised by a sharply-dressed mage who wanted to ensure that his well-groomed apprentices would not fall asleep while on duty, this elegant headgear resembles a tall hat appropriate for evening wear. In good light, one can make out the traditional stars, moons, and astrological signs associated with magician’s headgear.
These elegant hats have two enchantments placed upon them: The first prevents the wearer from removing it for more than a few moments. While the hat’s wearer is able to easily remove it to bow to a passing gentlewoman, for instance, he will find it magically leaps back onto his head a few seconds later. A convoluted phrase in ancient Sallvian will temporarily disable this curse, enabling the wearer to take the hat off.
The more powerful ability of these strange hats is the power to summon serpents. Whenever someone wearing one of these hats begins to fall asleep, an annoyed snake is summoned within the hat. These snakes may linger for several minutes, which generally brings the wearer to full alertness. The snake’s size and species appear to be randomly chosen, but poisonous specimens appear to be rare. Go to Comment
Several decades ago, an unusual form of headgear became briefly popular among students at several of the continent’s universities. Crafted from the skins of the vicious black-furred “Troll Rats” that infest the cities every summer, these stuffed hats resemble nothing more that a heap of rats perched haphazardly upon the students’ heads. Worn with long, striped scarves, they soon became symbols for the arrogant and unscholarly students that attended the land’s great centres of learning. While no self-respecting student would normally be caught dead in such an unfashionable item today, they have become iconic among players and entertainers portraying dissolute students. Go to Comment
This warm hat of brightly-colored striped wool is knitted with fuzzy ear flaps, several small, dangling pom-poms, and sturdy cords for tying it under the wearer’s chin. It also has a pair of solid moose antlers firmly attached to it. The antlers are not particularly large for their kind, weighing only 8 pounds, and are covered with downy fuzz.
Those donning the Antlered Adornment of Anglerune (and tying the cords under their chin) will activate its unusual enchantment: The hat’s cumbersome antlers will attach themselves to the wearer’s head and his (or her) skull and neck will thicken and reshape itself to handle the shock of using the antlers in combat. While the hat grants no special skill at using the antlers in combat, regular practice quickly brings proficiency, even as the constant shocks to the brain shave off IQ points.
According to legends about the hat and its antlered creator, Anglerune Elkskull, continual use will eventually cause the changes to become permanent, causing the wearer’s head to grow antlers of his own. Few wearers have been so enamored of the hat that they wanted to test the theory, but such antlers are supposedly needed if one hopes to craft another such magical item. Go to Comment
No, make it subtly addictive... Even away from the desert, the denizens of the Tunis wastes wear their hats, dripping coolant wherever they go. They feel strangely ill and uncomfortable without them, but couldn't exactly say why. Go to Comment
In a few of the more conservative cities of the continent, professional courtesans or other women of ill-repute are required by the local sumptuary laws to wear hennin-styled hats while in public. These pointed hats are similar to the classic “princess” hats of medieval paintings. While the statute is widely flouted by those courtesans whose noble patrons shelter them from the attentions of the authorities, the more common prostitutes will never be seen without the required hat.
Unfortunately, these hats bear a distinct resemblance to the hats traditionally worn by wizards, witches, and some dwarves and gnomes. Visitors that wear such headgear may find themselves the subject of some extremely strange rumors. Go to Comment
The Tunis desert is an unforgiving place, large and flat, with the occasional sand dune, but absolutely no cover, no large plants, no rocky outcroppings, and no human habitation besides the last chance towns that lay on the borders. But traveling through the desert is often unavoidable because of how far it stretches. A solution to the harsh temperatures is the use of an ether-like liquid, a natural coolant that many desert travelers soak into their clothes to make their travel through slightly more bearable. It is no replacement for water, but in a place like the Tunis Desert, no liquid should ever be wasted.
The caps sold in the border towns are very unassuming, usually white or tan, cylindrical with no brim but from the back a long piece of fabric drapes down which can be wrapped around the face in case of sandstorms and to protect the skin from the harsh rays of the sun. Under the cap is sewn a pocket, which holds another piece of fabric. Folded and dipped in the coolant the fabric is slightly cooler and will remain so for at least a days journey, the liquid is also sold separately for emergency soakings. Go to Comment
Extensive, a well written theocracy. I would comment more, but so many words...so many words.... (I'm in the process of assimilating the bulk of the Sectarian subs in a sitting so bear with me.) Go to Comment
Hit me with a gavel and pronounce me guilty. The only thing I was expected and didn't find is what I have termed Axiophilia, or Love of Law and Rules. I half expected this to be a cult of semi-delusional obsessive-compulsive axiophiles so in love with the letter of the law that they began to worship it. Thank you for not being what I expected. Go to Comment